Death at a Funeral (2010)
Elaine: You're going to be a father.
Oscar: I'm pregnant?
Elaine: No. I'm pregnant.
Oscar: You're pregnant too?
Aaron: Let me get this straight: our father was romantically involved with a guy that could fit in his pocket, and you're mad because he's white?
Uncle Russell: Hey, let me tell you something about women. Smarter than you think they are, but not nearly as smart as *they* think they are.
Cynthia: [to her childless daughter in law] You can't understand death until you've given life.
Ryan: Look at Martina, man the girl's all grown up.
Aaron: You mean little Martina? She's like in the 12th grade.
Ryan: Well she may be in 12th grade, but that ass is in grad school.
Jeff: He got in a fight with the table, and the table won.
Norman: You still smokin' that stuff?
Derek: No no no, I'm gonna stop, all right? *You* used to smoke, we used to smoke *together*.
Norman: I used to piss my pants and then I stopped!