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The Expendables
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The Expendables More at IMDbPro »

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7 out of 13 people found the following review useful:

See Stallone. See Stallone run. See Stallone kill everything and save everyone.

1/10
Author: from Australia
4 June 2011

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

This had the potential to be a great movie. Every big name action star was in it - Bruce Willis, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Jet Li, Sylvester Stallone... the list goes on. Packed full of explosive action scenes, how could this be anything but a winning formula? The answer: an egocentric director.

This movie is written by, directed by, and starred in by Stallone. He is the main character and the only one to get more than a modicum of screen time. He's the hero who kills everything, saves everyone, and gets the girl. His co-stars are delegated the back seat in all this and are atrociously underused.

The story doesn't even make sense. It's just action for the sake of action, with no real reason or plot development behind it. In one memorable scene an entire mansion/castle gets (intentionally) blown up. Why? The bad guys are outside - it doesn't achieve anything. Prior to this the main characters are laying the explosives which just get slapped around anywhere, and again you have to ask yourself, what for? That isn't a structural support, that doesn't destroy anything important. Why not put the explosives on, say, the munitions bunker? Or under the troop carriers? But no, then Stallone wouldn't have an excuse to blow up a building.

In short, the movie is just an excuse for Stallone to make himself look great on screen (it didn't work). The pyrotechnics is used in lieu of plot, and the co-stars barely get an opportunity to show off their talents. It's all about Stallone, Stallone, Stallone, and it's just an utter failure.

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8 out of 15 people found the following review useful:

cheesy action and macho stereotypes at its worst

1/10
Author: eternalstories from United States
25 January 2012

Admittedly I only watched about 30 minutes of this movie... but there is a reason. This movie is dialogue driven and the dialogue is unbelievably cheesy. Everything about this movie smacks of cookie cutter stereotypes. Big muscle guy with guns beer and a motorcycle. This can be expected in action movies however what makes it horrible is how easy it is to see through the props and actors and see how fake everything is. It's as if when they made this movie they had a check list of what makes a good action movie and were just checking off the boxes rather than developing believable characters. It may sound odd but it's as if these men were given guns, tattoos, motorcycles, and stereotypical macho man statements not because it is actually who the character is but because there's a formula to macho stereotype action movies. This movie is better served as a formulaic education to action movies. The whole thing screams of stereotypes and hardly believable characters.

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8 out of 15 people found the following review useful:

Lol! A film you can laugh at. Sheer Rubbish!

1/10
Author: Mariam from United Kingdom
19 November 2010

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

I'm not one to write reviews very often but in this case I really thought i have to. This film has considerably more prominent actors than most films. So that's quite rare. However for me this movie did not gel what-so-ever! There was so humour/comedy in it that just made me cringe. I had to fast forward parts because it was so embarrassing. Like when the generals daughter walks into the 'bar' and sees Sylvester (who by the way needs a voice transplant). I mean this movies lead roles are acting as though they are in there prime. When they clearly aren't. Eric Roberts was such a bad "baddy". lol. His acting made me laugh! Seriously couldn't they find someone to play the part at least half decent? Arnold Schwarzenegger and Bruce Willis shouldn't even have made an appearance! There was no point! or they should have got some 'not known' actors to do those roles!

Such bad Rubbish acting and most of the lines these people came up with are was just plain pathetic. Sylvester looked old and shrunken with his pecks up to his neck! Dolph was just an embarrassment! Enough said! Terry Crews was a disappointment but then again he wasn't meant to be one of the lead players, so can't say much.

The only thing I enjoyed was the two fights Jason Statham was in & one of Jet-Li's fights. The script was written for younger actors not actors that are past there 'sell by date'. There are many older actors out there playing respectable lead roles that suit them. I think these people need to start doing the same! 60 year old's acting as though they are tough kick-ass action guys made the whole film cringe worthy! & the whole concept of Sylvester seeing a girl old enough to be his grand daughter and within 10 minutes asking her to leave with him (forgetting the little children on the Island) just made me want to punch the TV! It was unrealistic and the actors were way too old for this kinda job!

A HUUUGGGE disappointment!

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9 out of 17 people found the following review useful:

Yawn, yawn, yawn!

3/10
Author: ozzy_in_uk from Australia
3 September 2010

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

Oh dear, where do I start? The ageing Sylvester Stallone assembles a very impressive cast for this unmitigated disaster of a movie. Whilst I wasn't expecting a collection of the greatest action films ever rolled into one epic blockbuster, I was hoping for something a little more substantial than this embarrassment.

The plot; a group of over-the-hill mercenaries do the business on a fictitious island, killing hundreds of baddies in the process, whilst miraculously not enduring any casualties themselves! Yawn.

Opening with an attack on a ship hijacked by Somali pirates, (and I doubt very much that any of them were actually Somali) stupid dialogue is sprouted off right before the baddies get massacred. With Dolph Lundgren about to hang the last one, his comrades protest by saying "that's not how we operate," before being attacked by Jet Li. Yawn.

Back in the world, the goodies all assemble at a tattoo parlour owned by the appropriately named Tool (Mikey Rourke). Spouting off some nonsense about a girl jumping off a bridge in Bosnia - yawn - he dishes out the jobs, lining up a meeting with Bruce and Arnie. The meeting takes all of 60 seconds, just long enough for a really pathetic joke about Arnie running for president. Yawn.

Visiting the island where a dodgy dictator needs sorting out, it becomes clear that a dodgy ex-CIA goon is the real target, which Sly manages to figure out all by himself. Yawn. The rest of the film is basically a yawn fest, with lots of fights, explosions, baddies being killed, and the pretty girl being saved. Yawn.

I wish I could build a time machine, go back to the other night and stop myself from going in to see this drivel! For film fans from the 80's and 90's, stay at home and watch "Die Hard," "Under Siege," or "Speed," instead of putting yourself through 90 minutes of unadulterated nonsense.

"The Expendables" should sweep the Razzies next year. Definitely wait for this film to come out on DVD, and then use it as a drinks coaster!

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10 out of 19 people found the following review useful:

Worst action movie ever?

3/10
Author: Earl from Australia
1 December 2012

You expect a measure of unreality in action movies, that's what they're all about. But such unreality ought be leavened by a pinch of verisimilutude, a sharp line or a sympathetic character, otherwise it'll fall flat.

'The Expendables' expends all these leavenings. Oh, but it doesn't stop there, even the action sequences are, to say the least, unimpressive. The climactic fight scenes take place in a dark tunnel, so it's hard to see what's happening and there is no room for any choreographed balletic action.

To make an obvious comparison, the firehose fight sequence in 'Transporter 2' is beautifully managed, the action, the camera-work, the editing, all work together to make a cinematically impressive fight sequence, as ridiculous as it may be in realistic terms. Nothing in 'The Expendables' comes close.

The characters in this movie are little more than names. The dialogue is leaden (how could any screenwriter want to put their name to it?) and clunks around the movie like heavy chains around the actors necks. There is one woman in the movie, she's water-tortured. The final action sequences, when the castle collapses, the ammo dump explodes, are just plain stupid.

Evidence for the prosecution: Sly asks Terry to throw a shell into the air, Sly shoots it with his full auto 68 round handgun and it explodes, destroying a helicopter. Yeah, right… With Sly, Dolph and Mickey up there on the big screen, this almost comes across as an advertisement for ill-advised plastic surgery. The very attractive Giselle Itie can't help but make them look even worse.

All up, this is just about the worst 'action' movie I've seen in the last ten years.

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10 out of 19 people found the following review useful:

wow im very disappointed

1/10
Author: thekyles99 from Canada
6 September 2010

The most anticipated movie of this summer was a total let down. How can this be??? The script was trash. Non interesting dialogue between very cool stars. i shouldve known this would happen as it usually does with movies loaded to the brim with star power. Dolph lundgren makes Arnold Schwartzenegger look like an academy award winning actor. Hardly any martial arts with Jet Li and the main stars were Stallone and Stathum. Although i did enjoy the game at the end of knife darts between the always cool no matter what he does Mickey Rourke and Stathum. Stallone has directed and written very cool movies before such as Rocky Balboa and the newest Rambo so i don't know what the hell went wrong with this? Randy couture was surprisingly good for the short time he is on screen, i even chuckled about his ufc conditioned cauliflower ears as to which he explains comically in the film. Once again very very disappointed in this damn!!!

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10 out of 19 people found the following review useful:

Just skip it.

2/10
Author: vogonford (vogonford@yahoo.com) from Portland, Oregon, USA
1 September 2010

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

Please, do not get me wrong. I love action films. I have a soft spot for those 80's violence fests like Delta Force because they're fun. I also liked the new Rambo movie and Grindhouse.

This, however, was just crap. The only reason why this isn't rated 1 is because of the best performance of the movie, by the AA-12 shotgun.

Basically, the fight scenes are boring, the story beyond stupid to the point that even the 80's would have been disappointed, the characters uncompelling and the movie overall is just a waste of time. I was hoping for this to be a good shoot-em-up, but it just ended up failing.

If you haven't seen this movie, don't. Watch something like Delta Force, as that's actually entertaining.

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11 out of 21 people found the following review useful:

Awful.

1/10
Author: Zentralsachse (zentralsachse) from Germany
7 November 2010

Turns out, that Sylvester Stallone obviously did get serious brain damage when repeatedly hit by Dolph Lundgreen and other bad guys in the ROCKY movies!

This is the only explanation for the brain-hurting movie "The Expendables". It does start bad, then it get worse and then it still manages to dissolve in stupidity. From time to time, this failed wannabe-action kinda thing tries to be even funny, well, it is as funny as a North-Korean party leader.

What a waste of resources. How many good movies could have been made with the money spend for this piece of nonsense. It is hard to believe that people have read the script by Stallone and actually started to work on this childish and naive story.

If you really HAVE to watch it – under all circumstances try to avoid to spend money for this dumb flick (e.g. watch it over the shoulder of someone in an airplane)...

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13 out of 25 people found the following review useful:

Just sad

1/10
Author: OutOfTimeMan from Sweden
9 September 2010

This is just garbage. One of the worst films I've ever seen in my life. It's not even bad-good. The dialog doesn't exist, the lines are lame, the actors are crap, the story is uninteresting. For every action film that I see, I lose more respect for people who are impressed by the same old explosions that made this genre, but even with that, a lot of them are actually watchable and funny or interesting to some extent. And don't buy the "it's about the expectations"-argument for this one. Even if you expect a lousy and mindless Hollywood action flick, you will be disappointed by this. Anything else is self-delusion. A 7.1 average for this at the time of writing this is just sad.

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14 out of 27 people found the following review useful:

I Be A Moovey Revyewer

1/10
Author: Arisdoddle from Australia
31 August 2010

Poorly written, poorly directed, poorly edited, poorly acted. It's just a disjointed collection of silly action and comedy scenes that were cobbled together and eventually given the title of "movie".

Anyone who gave this pile of poop more than 2 stars is obviously an industry shill, because anyone who finds it anything less than an insult:

a) Can't count to three b) Can't form coherent sentences c) Can't pronounce "computer" let alone figure out how to work one well enough to submit an online review d) Is confined to an institution that doesn't allow access to the outside (or online) world.

Just....so very sad. Nothing to see here. Move along please.

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