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Royal Pains (TV Series 2009–2016) Poster

(2009–2016)

Quotes

[opening montage]

Dr. Hank Lawson: [voiceover] I'm Hank. I was your typical emergency room doctor... till I got fired.

Hospital Administrator: You let a billionaire hospital trustee die to save some kid off the street.

Dr. Hank Lawson: I made a judgment call.

Hospital Administrator: You made a mistake.

Dr. Hank Lawson: [voiceover] This is my brother.

Evan R. Lawson: I'm Evan R. Lawson, C.P.A.

Dr. Hank Lawson: [voiceover] He took me away from my troubles and to the Hamptons, and suddenly I had a chance to become a whole new kind of doctor. It turns out the wealthy and not-so-wealthy out here could use a guy who makes house calls, so I got a second chance to do what I do best.

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Sam Axe: ["Characters Welcome" crossover ad with "Burn Notice": Sam Axe is drinking a mojito when Evan calls him on his cellphone] Evan! How's HankMed?

Evan R. Lawson: Forget HankMed. One word: "Spyami."

Sam Axe: "Spyami?"

Evan R. Lawson: The future #1 spy-for-hire agency in all of South Florida.

Sam Axe: [incredulous] Uh-huh?

Evan R. Lawson: Just imagine benches and T-shirts and coffee mugs! We're going to be rich but it's going to be amazing!

Sam Axe: Oh no, I'm going into a canyon here in Miami.

[makes garbled noises]

Evan R. Lawson: I'm going to call you right back. You stay right there. I'm going to call you right back.

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Divya Katdare: ["Characters Welcome" crossover ad with "Burn Notice": Divya is diagnosing Sam Axe in a bar] It could be excessive blood loss or hypoglycemia. Are you on a diuretic?

Sam Axe: No.

Divya Katdare: Perhaps it's even psychogenic polydipsia.

Sam Axe: Oh?

Divya Katdare: Any one of those could be causing your excessive thirst.

Waiter: [gives Sam a beer bottle] Here you go, sir.

Sam Axe: Thank you.

[he takes a drink from it]

Sam Axe: Hey! What do you know? It's gone! It's like a miracle cure!

Divya Katdare: Miraculous.

Sam Axe: Doesn't mean it's stopped. Sammy's very sick.

Divya Katdare: Is this how you usually pick up women?

Sam Axe: No, usually I just get 'em drunk. Waiter!

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Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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