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Lorenzo Adams is in trouble. While working at a bill collection agency in Norfolk, VA an old debt of his own suddenly comes due when Frankie Gutierrez, an L.A. loan shark, shows up at his door. With less than three weeks to payback $100,000 and Frankie's enforcer, Omar, shadowing his every move, Lorenzo cooks up a plan to pay his debt by scamming the collection agency and an inner-city mission. Neither Omar or the people from the mission are what he expects and Lorenzo's scheme doesn't work quite as he plans. Written by
Seriously lame and pathetic! Should never make it to the Red Box
Friday night - kids are out on town for some fun and wife has gone to bed early and being bored I picked up a movie for myself.
Found "Mr.Machete" on the cover and expected some action and good relaxation to some snacks and a beer. Didn't expect much - but halfway through the movie I wondered why this movie was released in September 2010 and there was not more than one more review until today.
I found out pretty soon as I was dozing off and took breaks to the bathroom and loading up on some more beer.
Is this some covert promotion for what is a scam anyway? "Jesus". The movie had not even finished and I was typing these notes as it was ending. It was so boring and lame that I wanted a refund from Blockbuster! The actors are all B-actors and the owner of the company can not even fake a cry when he pretends that his wife is going to leave him, why he needs a 3 weeks vacation to turn his marriage around. The manager of the office who is doing well is hated by all the employees gets to run the office while the boss is away.
"Mr. Machete" - Mexican scarface B-actor comes along and wants "his money back" that the manager owes him from having skipped town years ago when he started a restaurant that failed.
Being the boss for 3 weeks - he fires all the regular crew and takes in a bunch of homeless people that he finds on the Jesus freak mission. They can not even read or write and magically they learn that over some days and turns into a success! Collects the $150,000 in pennies to the dollar collections and takes the cash to the gangster who he owes the money. He gets killed by a drive by shooting and . . . .
What is wrong with this director? Are they smoking crack in Hollywood and then make a movie of some fantasies? Or is this what America is heading for? "Rebuilding America with homeless people who runs Wallstreet when it has all crashed"? I didn't expect anything out of this movie but it just really got me upset thinking that some fake Jesus activity is going to set everything straight. The first review person needs to wake up and not be so lame. The movie was "released" 6 months ago and first now it was out on DVD? Oh boy! It should NEVER been have released and those actors should PAY for letting us sit through such meaningless Jesus brainwashing crap! This flick wasted 90 minutes of my life!
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