- Agent Baldwin P. 'Bulletproof' Vess: [opening narration] Empire City was in its greatest danger. C.O.P.S., the Central Organization of Police Specialists, was just being formed, and The Big Boss had recruited the scientific genius, Dr. Badvibes, to invent the Ultimate Crime Machine. And now, Dr. Badvibes was about to use his evil device. Here's how the caper continues...
- Hugh S. 'Bullseye' Forward: Big job for our first one? Think we can handle it?
- Suzy 'Mirage' Young: We're C.O.P.S. aren't we? We can handle it.
- Sgt. P.J. 'Longarm' O'Malley: Hey! What are you rookies doing here! Vess told you to stay put!
- Officer Donny 'Hardtop' Brooks: And miss all the fun?
- Sgt. P.J. 'Longarm' O'Malley: What about you, B.P.? What's your codename going to be?
- Hugh S. 'Bullseye' Forward: Yeah. What's B.P. stand for anyway?
- Sgt. P.J. 'Longarm' O'Malley: I don't know what it used to stand for, but from now on, I'd say it stands for Bulletproof!
- Agent Baldwin P. 'Bulletproof' Vess: Then that's my codename from now on. You all performed splendidly today. I'm proud of you. But as you know, Big Boss and the others got away. And they'll be back. There are many more battles to be fought. But together, one day I promise you, we're going to put the Big Boss behind bars!
- Hugh S. 'Bullseye' Forward: [spotting the Ultimate Crime Machine on radar] Now that's what I call a serious bogey!
- Hugh S. 'Bullseye' Forward: [after crash landing the Ultimate Crime Machine in the C.O.P.S. parking lot] Gee, good thing there was a free parking space!
- Agent Baldwin P. 'Bulletproof' Vess: [silence]
- Hugh S. 'Bullseye' Forward: No sense of humour.
- Sgt. P.J. 'Longarm' O'Malley: [in a building being flown over Empire City] Now I've seen everything!
- Sgt. P.J. 'Longarm' O'Malley: [looks up and sees the Ultimate Crime Machine] Let me change that. Now I've seen everything!