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*** This review may contain spoilers ***
Watching New Moon, the latest in the Twilight Saga, was for me, an
experience identical to reading the book:
Mistake #1 was the script. It was juvenile and contrived to the extent that I wondered if some misguided fool had allowed Stephenie Queen-of-the-Paedophiles Meyer to write it herself. Given the drastic amount of quotes from the book, they may as well have.
New Moon is significantly more introspective than its fellows: Bella mopes for most of the story, sans Edward. Introspection can work well on the page. However, it's much harder to transfer onto film. Montages of Bella screaming in her sleep would have been more at home in One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, and when her depression is drawn out for over two hours, it begins to feel gratuitous.
As for the acting, they try, they really do, but they fall short. Kristen Stewart is monotonous. She plays Bella in shades of grey, sounding exactly the same when she tells Edward she loves him as when she apologises to Charlie for her three day disappearance. Robert Pattinson equals her dullness, looking apathetic after Bella is attacked by Jasper not a shred of care or conflict in his expression. Taylor Lautner might have been good is he didn't find it necessary to pause between every other word, adding unnecessary screen time.
Props, however, must be given to Dakota Fanning and Anna Kendrickson. Kendrickson's comedic timing was superb. In fact, I enjoyed all the scenes with Bella's human 'friends' they provided much-needed comedic relief. And Dakota Fanning, with her first line, proved that at only fifteen-years-of-age she has more talent than the rest of the cast combined. If only she'd gotten more screen time.
The creators of New Moon seemed aware of the overall dreadfulness of the film, and attempted to make up for it with shirtless close-ups. Too bad it didn't work. One look at Jailbait Lautner's naked chest was enough, after that it felt like a cheap tease. Add to this Edward's entrance, which was so drawn out it was laughable.
Special congratulations to whoever chose the locations. If it hadn't been for the beautiful scenery, the film would have been even more unbearable than it already was. Also, whoever organised the soundtrack did a brilliant job Bon Iver and Death Cab for Cutie on one album is enough for me to buy it (although, I'll lie to the cashier and tell them that it's for my little sister).
Overall, New Moon was about as captivating as watching a slug crawl across the lawn, and just as slow. The precious few action scenes were sporadic and too short-lived to be interesting. Every boyfriend who let his girlfriend drag him there left with a pair of blue-balls thanks to the constant (and frustrating) sexual teasing between Bella and every other male character (which was achieved without a shred of genuine chemistry). And I wasn't the only audience member to exclaim "Finally!" with relief once the credits rolled.
Thankfully, the majority of cinema-goers aren't as dim as film executives seem to believe, and most people snickered at the ridiculousness of it all particularly the final line. I might have felt bad that I was talking during the film if it hadn't been for the fact that everybody else was, too.
As my friend Caroline so concisely put it, "One and a half stars would be too generous." Don't see it, or, if you do, do what I did, and go on Cheap Tuesday.
*** This review may contain spoilers ***
The MTV Movie Awards just ended and the worst movie that I've ever
seen, New Moon, won the main Awards: Best Movie, best actress (Kristen
Stewart) and best actor (Robert Pattinson). MTV is destroying young
people's brain all over the world but specially in America. I feel very
sorry for the new generation.
Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson performances in both Twilight movies are by far the worst that I've seen in my 3 decades of life.
Ahh, The couple with less chemistry in the whole World also won the Best Kiss award. Good Lord!!
Congratulations on the "awards"! LOL
*** This review may contain spoilers ***
In my comment I want and will try to answer on some questions which sticked in my head after watching Twilight and New moon. First, why twilight was not just popular but literally bursted teen world. What was so unbelievable magnetic in Twilight? Second, why New Moon turned out so tasteless with quite good and fresh ingredients? Well, Twilight, generally, it's not a story about vampire, it's about love and passion and what most important thing it's about inaccessible love and passion. My first association with Edward and Bella was Elisabeth Bennet and Mark Darcy. This plot of hate in public and love with first look inside and gradual opening true feelings always charmed. It's classic and there is nothing surprising in Twilight's success. Besides classical love story there is magic of vampire's immortally, reading minds, seeing future, longing girl's blood (and it affects more than usual sexual attraction in ordinary melodramas), beautiful music with right mood in right places, fantastic landscape from flying camera, silent and mystical atmosphere, and (don't worry, I didn't forget) Robert Pattinson. I reckon the combination of innocent young love and dark Edward's desire of killing Bella it's the cocktail almost everybody wants to drink. Catherine Hardwicke feels keenly what teens want and she gave them beautiful which they can understand. A million defects in Twilight you just dissemble because it doesn't matter. And what we seeing in New Moon? It's really boring and too long. I'm almost asleep, and that telling a person who loves Gerry of Gus Van Sant with no action at all. But New Moon have an action but there is no sense and nothing exciting. Everything what was so good in Twilight including logical acting and simple but pretty rich dialogs was so wrong in New Moon. I read the books but still didn't understand reasons of character's behavior in the film. Sentimental words repeating over and over again during two hours about how she loves or how she feels produced only irritation. In Twilight everything was obvious without much words. New Moon's music made a fairy impression what right if considering New Moon like a fairy tale, but this is most realistic book in saga. Hardwicke knows where highlight key points and she made Twilight romantic, but I didn't see promised gloomy in New Moon. No mysterious, no magnetic, no passion. It was bright and colored. Bella's skin was shiny white in Twilight but in the second part it's even pinkish. It has to be a story about despair and death of spirit and sinking deep in yourself and depression. It has to be a story about loosing The Biggest Love Ever. All of Bella's hopes and dreams disappears just like Edward did. And then she slowly wakes up, step by step after months of semi-life because of sunshine of her friend Jacob, but everything I can remember about this character it's his naked trunk. Actors looks absurdly wooden and not so handsome as in first part. Why all of this personages were so natural in the first film? I can give only one answer: because of director. And I'm sorry Chris Weitz, because I like him.
*** This review may contain spoilers ***
When this movie came out, I thought all the nasty comments were just
people hating on it without seeing it because it's a popular flick for
young, teenage girls, and they wanted to look cool by trashing it
before it came out.
And then I actually watched the movie, and... SWEET Jesus... It is actually one of the worst movies I've ever seen. It's not just people hating on it. It is actually a really bad movie. I mean I feel like I've been mooned watching "New Moon".
But, just to even things out, I'm a guy. So I'm not exactly unbiased when it comes to this movie. (I saw the movie because I work at a Drive-In theater, and it was a really slow night.)
That said, I've seen love stories and fantasy love stories that I've actually liked, or I can respect for being well made, even if they're not my thing. And that's what I was expecting with this. I was expecting it just to not be my thing, but it made me frigging ANGRY to try to sit through this. I say "try" because I couldn't sit through the whole thing!
Everyone else has commented on the movie, but I'll add my two-sense anyway.
ACTING - Mostly awful. The woman playing Bella is actually OK, but she's given horrible dialog, a horrible motivation, and a horrible story so it's impossible to get into her character.
STORY - It's stupid. That's the only way to describe it. It's like watching a two hour emo-trip.
Here's the story ***SPOILERS***
Edward breaks up with Bella. She goes through a long... long... long... LONG over-dramatic period of mourning where she meets another guy and basically acts completely emo and sees Edward everywhere. Not just for a few days or a few weeks, but MONTHS. Which the film MAKES A POINT TO SHOW US BECAUSE THEY PUT UP TITLES SHOWING US THE PASSING MONTHS AS SHE STARES OUT A WINDOW!!!!
And then she starts hurting herself and putting herself in dangerous situations because... life is meaningless. And you know, she's emo. Because her boyfriend broke up with her. And even though she's got other guys expressing an interest left and right... she just keeps crying over this one guy, who is kind of a dick. That's not romantic. That's a sign you need psychological help. And it is a terrible message for young women. "If your boyfriend breaks up with you... act like it's the end of the world... because it is. Don't try to move on. Dwell on it. And get into motorcycle accidents."
DIALOGUE - Bad. SPECIAL EFFECTS - Bad. PACING - Bad. LOVE SCENES - Unbelievably bad. CHARACTER MOTIVATIONS - Ridiculous.
Well... I will say the cinematography is nice. Some of the editing is nice. The girl playing Bella can act, but she's given bad material. And some of the scenery is kind of nice.
But in all... the movie is really crappy. I didn't see the first one, and I don't intend to. Hell, I didn't intend to watch this one. I only tried to because it was a slow night at the drive-in movie theater where I work. But if you want to watch a good fantasy love story, there's better stuff out there. There's more well-made stuff out there.
And fans of "Twilight," I'm not hating on you. If you like it, hey, everyone's got their own preferences. Watch what you want to. But I didn't care for the movie, and I, personally, didn't find enough good to give it a higher rating.
1/10 - Only watch it if you're a fan of "Twilight" or you're really into this kind of thing. To anyone else... I wouldn't even bother with it.
This is definitely one of the most hyped up movie ever...
The whole Twilight saga is just another example of how boring people nowadays are. A teenage girl falling in love with a vampire, and has a werewolf friend. What's so new and creative about this whole thing? I mean, why do people think movies such as Underworld sucks and yet this one great? One reason: Because this one involves teenage love.
Yes. A girl who has no emotion, no character, never smiles... gives her first love to a vampire... and when he dumps her, begin to act suicidal just to see him... at the same time ignore the wolf-boy who at least is kind and not selfish and seems to have a heart... is just plain stupid and boring... yet this gets a lot of young people high... I don't get it.
To make things worst, this movie could not have delivered it more boring and dull... there were hardly any exciting dialog, no action (all the action are already in the trailer)... and most of the male characters in the film are half naked most of the time... you know, just so they can get more teenage girls to watch it.
Plain dumb and boring.
*** This review may contain spoilers ***
This movie is one of the worst movies out there, even a low budget
B-movie is better, much better than this one. Or is it really a low
budget movie ? Cause most of the scenes are in the forest, anyway..
I couldn't even laugh at its stupidity. It made me sad and disgusted. They should pay us to see it, not we.
It has very bad acting. Some scenes don't have logics. Has cheesy romance. The special effects a 10 year old can make them better and the list goes on..
Here is the summary: Bella talks, talks, talks and does nothing, then Edward talks, talks, talks and then they go in the forest and they talk some more. Then he leaves and she starts crying. Jacob shows off his pecs and the girls start screaming, then he transforms into a giant wolf and goes all horny for Bella. Edward meanwhile thinks Bella is dead for some reason, whatever and wants to die, but Bella of course arrives just in time and saves him. They kiss and he asks to marry him. Suddenly the end.
Stay away from it! it will hurt, believe me.
Whilst I do not begrudge Stephanie Meyer on her success with the
Twilight series and the untold pots of money she's amassed; she's no
J.K Rowling either. To quote one of her critics, Stephen King: "while
both authors spoke to young readers, the real difference is that Jo
Rowling is a terrific writer and Stephenie Meyer can't write worth a
darn. She's not very good." I get the feeling Steph was a stay-at-home
soccer mum, whose only boredom was to reinvent a genre. Don't get me
wrong, it's nice to bring something different into Vampire folklore (as
Joss Whedon did with Angel and Ron Koslow with Moonlight. Both vamps
walked around in the day,whilst avoiding the sun; and displaying their
fangs-for-all menace at night). Angel was in love with Buffy Summers,
but their love was not cringe-inducing and much can be said for Mick
"Moonlight" St.John and his passion for Beth Turner. Sadly, if Twilight
was written in the 80s and turned into a movie in that period, we could
have had a different story in the Romeo & Juliet vein (which was sadly
alluded to in New Moon and possibly insulting to Shakespeare himself!)
Bram Stoker said the inspiration for Dracula came to him after
contracting VD, a BLOOD related disease. Does this mean that Steph
Meyers happened to get inspiration from her menstrual cycle? So, what's
wrong with the Twilight movies? First of all, why doesn't Edward Cullen
possess fangs? Can a Twilight reader explain this to me? The notion of
a veggie vampire isn't new and was seen in Supernatural's season two
episode "Bloodlust" - (featuring Buffy Alumni, Amber Benson) as a
vegetarian vampire with an impressive set of retractable fangs and a
new craving for Cow blood. She was a badass girl and yet, you liked her
nobility too. A very convincing storyline, thanks to the writers and
actors of the show (Eric Kripke, you're God! Jensen & Jared, you two
make Pattinson & Lautner look like real amateurs!)Steph Meyer has said
on Oprah recently that she avoided horror stories and it seems she
should have stayed away!
If you want decent, hardcore horror by a female author, look to Charlaine Harris and her Sookie Stackhouse girl, that inspired HBO's "True Blood", a sick, shocking and very funny vampire show with attitude. Tonight, I sat through New Moon, in a sea of giggling girls who just didn't know when to STFU! In fact, if Twilight was made as a comedy, it would actually work! Upon seeing Robert Pattinson as Edward, one girl shouted out: "Is that him? He's not all that!" I have to admit that was almost the highlight of sitting through the torture. I wanted to leave; but also remained seated to see if New Moon would conjure a surprise or two. Well, it did, most laughably that werewolves transformed in the daytime (the cute, cuddly, ferocious kind; not the tear-your-heart out muthas, mind you)and vampires going for long swims (WTF??)It even tries to be pop-culture clever in the form of Victoria, but the attempt was poor and looked smug and painful at the same time. Also, is Bella supposed to be a poor-girl's suppressed Goth? Watch Katie Holmes do a far better job in Disturbing Behaviour.
If you want wiseass remarks, look to Dean Winchester in Supernatural, the King as far as I'm concerned. Sadly, today's generation has no clue about anything, and the demographic for Twilight, clearly proves that. I miss the glory days of the 1980s, when films WERE films, and not concerned about "original" ways of enticing an audience. And how does someone like Chris Weitz go from directing American Pie to this???
If there are any redeeming qualities to Twilight, it's really underused actors like Billy Burke as Charlie Swan; Michael Sheen as Aro and Dakota Fanning as Jane. Michael's no stranger to the horror genre and cuts a convincing Lycan in the Underworld series. They could've given him fangs here, but guess they didn't want their audience to have nightmares (please!) Kristen Stewart is a good actress but struggles with the dialogue at times. Rob Pattinson (whose career will only last 2 more years)does a good American accent but is no Brad Pitt (who incidentally, played a great romantic fanged lead in Interview With The Vampire). The real horror here, is that Hollywood has been running out of ideas for years and this is the best source material they could find? Sit through and watch at your peril - and get the hell out while the screaming of prepubescent girls rings in your ears! You have been warned.
*** This review may contain spoilers ***
Firstly, I should point out that I am not someone who hates the
Twilight franchise, and I have read the books; neither am I a 15 year
old girl who has fallen hopelessly in love with one of the two male
The film had several problems with it that became increasingly obvious as the film progressed.
The acting, and not all the acting either. The really sad thing is that there were some strong performances here (more on these later), but Kristen Stewart dear God she can't act. In Twilight she was annoying, in New Moon she is indescribably annoying, but nevertheless, I'll try to describe it. For one, she blinks a lot and she twitches a lot, I don't know why she does this. Also, she only ever wears one of two expressions: slightly shocked, or utterly disinterested. She just looks bored to be there, I'd rather fill out tax returns for the rest of my life than watch another minute of Bella moping about, looking depressed. I know she does this in the book, but the film isn't the book. The director took liberties elsewhere; he could have found a better way to portray this.
Moreover, even before Edward breaks up with Bella she's a complete cipher. In the book Bella is interesting, compassionate and full of life; someone you could fall in love with. In the film she is a boring, boring, boring kill-joy who can't even accept gifts on her birthday without kicking up a fuss. Why does Edward like her? Yes, she's quite hot, but that's about it. She has nothing else, no personality at all.
Next, the music. It wasn't that I didn't like it (I love Paramore), it just wasn't even remotely appropriate most of time. Film music is film music: it compliments a scene, it shouldn't dominate it. The one exception to this was the scene in which Harry Clearwater has a heart-attack; I felt the music here actually worked quite well.
Oh, and the colouring/lighting I don't even know where to begin. It was awful. Really, really awful, in fact, it was almost as annoying as watching Kristen Stewart. The colouring was alternately too dark, too washed out, or too bright. Also, did anyone else notice the camera constantly flicking between people's faces, as well as the totally unnecessary close-ups? Apparently Kristen Stewart wasn't the only one feeling twitchy. The camera-work alone made the break-up scene in the woods between Edward and Bella a complete joke. And that's before you include Kristen's total inability to act; Patterson kept cringing every time Bella delivered another terrible line, by the end he was starting to look embarrassed to be involved in scene more wooden than the trees surrounding them.
That said, the film did have some redeeming features. The CGI on the wolves, which I know some people didn't like, I thought was pretty good. The wolves looked a little bit cuddlier than I imagined, but that's fair enough. Also, was it really necessary for the Quileutes to be quite so topless? It just felt a bit cheap and exploitative.
Some of the supporting acting I quite liked too. Most of the Cullen's (especially Alice) were good, Bella's friends were good, Dakota Fanning pulled off menacing quite well too, even Robert Patterson and Taylor Lautner were OK, if unexceptional. Michael Sheen was also decent (although I didn't buy into him quite as much as I did in the Underworld series, in which he was immense), and added a little bit of genuine class to the cast list. The problem is that all of these little performances are overshadowed by Kristen Stewart's monstrous tribute to bad acting.
In short, don't watch this film. It's immensely frustrating and self-involved. After about an hour of watching it, I really wanted to kill Bella, and by the end of the film I would have settled for killing just about any of the cast. If the film had lasted another 10 minutes, no one would have been safe. I did, however, get some free popcorn and a hug from my flatmate, so not all bad. But seriously train wreck.
If this is going to be the new norm in Hollywood, I'm going to stop going to the theater. I went and saw this movie with my wife, we just recently saw "Twilight" and have not read the books, so we were at a disadvantage next to the million's of other kids in line with us. The only good mark I can give this film is that it's a new spin on the old Vampire tale. Plus, it's a new spin on the "i'm a girl being chased by two boys, who will fight over me." This formula has been done thousands of times, and it won't be too long before there's another silly teen-craze movie that draws in the current generation of movie goers. The negative marks on this film are too numerous to mention. It's plain and simply bad. It rates up there with Manos: hands of fate, and From Justin to Kelly. This is an example of the junk movies that are made in today's age, and just like the recent Transformer's movie it's made a boat-load of money based on hype. If anyone actually watches this movie more than once needs to be screened for psychological problems.
So, I'm not going to insult the people who liked this movie but I have
to ask: What in the world do you like about this movie? OK i get it,
the books are good, I've read them but the movies are just awful. The
actors are really bad, the lines, everything. Kristen Stewart is a bad
actress. And Robert Pattison a horrible actor. I know you all are going
to say " go to hell you don't know what you're talking about" but this
comment is just my opinion. just like others wrote. I have some friends
that loved this movie and i still try to understand why? I thought i
was going to fall asleep at the cinema. It was SO boring. The actors
have no charisma. nothing. no facial expression. The lines are horrible
and I better stop here. So, I've learned my lesson,I'm not going to the
cinema to see the next movie. I've wasted good money on this one. I'm
not making the same mistake again next year or whenever it will be. So
people sorry if anyone got mad with this comment, not my intention,
just wanted to express my feeling towards this movie ( if you can call
it that ).
With respect, Raluca from Romania :)
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