Two and a Half Men (TV Series)

Above Exalted Cyclops (2009)

Charlie Sheen: Charlie Harper

Quotes 

• Chelsea : [the four are at a restaurant, where Chelsea sets up Alan with the "perfect date", Rose]  Charlie, Alan, this is my friend, Rose. Rose, this is Charlie and Alan.

  Rose : [pointing a handshake towards Charlie]  It's nice to meet you, Alan.

  Chelsea : No, that's Charlie.

  Rose : Ooh! Even better! Hi Alan!

  Alan Harper : [monotone]  Hi.

  Chelsea : Why don't we all sit down?

  Charlie Harper : So many reasons...

• Rose : [during blind date]  Alan, I understand you're a chiropractor?

  Alan Harper : Yes. I am a chiropractor. Charlie?

  Charlie Harper : Yes. He's a chiropractor.

  Rose : Oh, that's just terrific. And what do you do, Charlie?

  Charlie Harper : Um... I write... kids songs and... jingles. Alan?

  Alan Harper : Yes. He writes kids songs and jingles. And I am a chiropractor.

  Charlie Harper : Yes. He's a chiropractor.

• Charlie Harper : So, you actually want to be with him?

  Rose : I do.

  Charlie Harper : And you believe she has no ulterior motive whatsoever?

  Alan Harper : I do.

  Charlie Harper : Fine! I now pronounce you fruitbasket and nutcase. And God have mercy on your souls.