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"NCIS" Hide and Seek (TV Episode 2009) Poster

(TV Series)

(2009)

Quotes

Ziva David, Mossad Liaison: Why is it always the case that when two people struggle over a gun, one person never shoots the other? The gun miraculously just goes off.

NCIS Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Abby said it was an evil gun.

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NCIS Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Why did you take the gun?

Noah Taffet: I guess... I thought it was cool.

NCIS Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Would you still think it was cool if I told you this gun was used to kill somebody?

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Abby Sciuto: [Looking at some maggots recovered from a dead body] Aren't they just the cutest things?

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Ziva David, Mossad Liaison: Speaking of snipers, has anyone seen Gibbs?

[Abby enters with a cup of coffee]

Abby Sciuto: Gear up!

NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: You're not Gibbs.

Abby Sciuto: There's a gun found, Navy Base Housing.

NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: Abby, that doesn't warrant a team call-out. A, there are thousands of guns on a Navy Base...

NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: And B, you're not Gibbs.

Abby Sciuto: Okay, what if I told you the base MPs gave me the gun to test?

NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: Doesn't warrant a team call-out.

Abby Sciuto: And the gun was found under a kid's bed, and it was loaded.

Ziva David, Mossad Liaison: Still does not warrant a call-out.

Abby Sciuto: [takes a sip of Gibbs's coffee, and grimaces] Ugh! And it was recently fired.

NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzoNCIS Special Agent Timothy McGeeZiva David, Mossad Liaison: It's not a call-out.

NCIS Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: [entering] You heard the lady, Gear up!

[the team gears up]

Abby Sciuto: They only listen to their master, Gibbs. Only you can crack the whip...

[hands him the coffee]

Abby Sciuto: Only you can drink the swill.

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NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: [Speaking of a magazine] You know what my father would've done to me if he found this in my room?

NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Stolen it back?

NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: Slap me in the side of the head with it.

NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: That sounds vaguely familiar.

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Ziva David, Mossad Liaison: This reminds me of the forest I used to have fun in as a child.

NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: I find that hard to believe.

Ziva David, Mossad Liaison: What? That Israel had forests?

NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: No, that you had fun as a child.

Ziva David, Mossad Liaison: [chuckles] Oh, sure. My father used to blindfold us, and take us into the middle of the forest. And then we had to find our way out, by ourselves.

NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: I stand corrected.

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NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Their moms are going to help us find the body?

NCIS Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: They're not coming to help us find the body. They're coming to be with them when they do.

NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Oh, right.

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NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Oh yeah, I forgot. Old man McGee was Navy, wasn't he?

NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: That's right... Yep. This was my childhood. It's just like these kids.

NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Which one were you: the skinny one, the quiet one, or the one with the hot mom?

[Realizes the mothers are behind him within earshot]

NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Boys!

[DiNozzo runs after the boys]

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Ziva David, Mossad Liaison: Somehow the gun got out of evidence, and into the hands of a 12-year old.

NCIS Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Who held the evidence?

Abby Sciuto: ...We did. It was an NCIS case.

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Abby Sciuto: [Imitating Gibbs] Ziva, pull case files from Norfolk PD. Find out who bought that gun.

[Ziva snickers]

NCIS Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: You heard her.

[Ziva looks at Gibbs, then at Abby and goes to her desk]

Abby Sciuto: I could get used to this.

NCIS Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: [as he passes her] Don't.

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NCIS Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Something on fire?

Abby Sciuto: No. I'm just burning sage to take the hex off the gun. It's got some bad mojo. And I want to get rid of it before the babies are born.

[Abby sighs]

Abby Sciuto: It's an evil gun, Gibbs. This gun... kills people.

NCIS Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Abs...

Abby Sciuto: I know what you're going to say, guns don't kill people, people kill people. But this gun kills people!

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NCIS Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Ziva, tough time at the Pawn Shop?

Ziva David, Mossad Liaison: [Ziva sighs] I ran into a stone wall.

NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Brick wall.

Ziva David, Mossad Liaison: No! It was a stone wall! I backed up too quickly.

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NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: Why would I buy a set of clubs that Ducky could not use?

NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Why? Oh gee, let me think. I don't know. Maybe because if you don't buy them, I will tell Ducky that you destroyed his one-of-a-kind, hand-crafted, hickory-shafted, vintage golf clubs.

NCIS Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: [Notices Ducky standing nearby] I think you just did.

Dr. Donald 'Ducky' Mallard: [Ducky walks closer] Let's just call it even, Timothy. That Jazz albumn that I borrowed from you?

NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: My original vinyl pressing of Django Reinhardt's Crazy Rhythms?

Dr. Donald 'Ducky' Mallard: Yeah. You were right. It was unique. It was original.

NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: It was autographed. What happened to it?

Dr. Donald 'Ducky' Mallard: Good question.

[Ducky leaves]

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Dr. Donald 'Ducky' Mallard: [speaking of a victim] His attempts to abuse himself to death were interrupted by a 22 caliber slug to the head.

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Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Tony's nicknames for Agent McGee: McRanger Rick

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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