Vikram: Confidence... It's the food of the wise man, but the liquor of the fool.
Kevin Malone: Dunder Mifflin. This is Kevin. Please hold while I transfer you.
Kevin Malone: Oscar! Your mom!
Jim Halpert: Charles is having Kevin cover the phones for a while. How do I say this diplomatically? I think Kevin is doing exactly as well as anyone might have expected someone like him to perform in a position like that.
Jim Halpert: Yep, I used to play soccer in school. From second to fourth grade. I was on the orange team.
Pam Beesly: [frustrated shouting] I can't do this. I had a real job. I sat 10 feet away from my fiancé. I had health benefits. I was just feeling impulsive. I should've gotten a tiny tattoo on my ankle.
Michael Scott: Blech.