- Jeetendra 'Jitubhai' B. Patel: If you start being too honest, you will remain a bachelor all your life.
- Yogesh B. Patel: I will not be dishonest. I want an honest relationship.
- Jeetendra 'Jitubhai' B. Patel: Dishonesty is the key to a long-lasting marriage.
- Bhavna Hasmukhbhai Shukla: Look, I'm sorry. I can not marry you. Your first marriage is destined to fail.
- Yogesh B. Patel: Jesus, man!
- Bhavna Hasmukhbhai Shukla: In this house we only take Lord Krishna's name.
- Yogesh B. Patel: I mean, Krishna, man!
- Yogesh B. Patel: You know, Grandpa, something really strange happened. I met the first girl, then the second, and the second girl looked exactly like the first one. I mean, they... they looked just the same!
- Nanaji: Let me explain. Now, at your age, in all the girls you see, you will only see one girl's face in all of them.
- Yogesh B. Patel: Why is that?
- Nanaji: Because, in every girl, you are searching for the girl of your dreams. That's why in every face, you will only see that face.
- Yogesh B. Patel: Is that really true, Grandpa?
- Nanaji: And remember, every girl is capable of being your dream girl.
- Yogesh B. Patel: Does this... happen to everybody?
- Nanaji: Don't know about others, but this is surely what happened to your Grandpa.
- Rajni Parmar: [explaining bringing a stenographer to a private dinner] Marriage is a sort of contract, is it not? There was a time when our parents used to negotiate this. Now it's the new generation. The boys and girls settle it amongst themselves.
- [Yoesh's star chart says his first relationship is destined to fail but not his second]
- Bhavna Hasmukhbhai Shukla: [suggesting a solution] I can only marry you if you've had a complete physical relationship with any girl.
- Yogesh B. Patel: "Complete physical relationship" means...?
- Bhavna Hasmukhbhai Shukla: You don't know?
- Yogesh B. Patel: Actually, I do know. I know a lot but it's not been "complete" yet.
- Bhavna Hasmukhbhai Shukla: Actually, there could be one more solution: If you have a complete physical relationship with the same girl that you're going to marry, then you might just save your first marriage.
- Yogesh B. Patel: So you're... You mean with you?
- Bhavna Hasmukhbhai Shukla: Yes.
- [Anjali is said to speak top English]
- Yogesh B. Patel: So have you been in a relationship before? I'm just asking, just generally.
- Anjali: No, no, no, no. No boyfriend. Not allowed.
- Yogesh B. Patel: Oh, so you don't go out on dates.
- Anjali: No-no, I go out on all dates. Sundates, Mondates... All dates up till Saturdates.
- Yogesh B. Patel: My name is Yogesh Bharat bhai Patel! I'm a man! A real Man! No protein supplements! No steroids! And I don't need any father-in-law to help me take care of my wife! Understood?
- Jeetendra 'Jitubhai' B. Patel: [following the crazy behavior of a prospective bride] Indu bhai did what any other smart businessman would do.
- Yogesh B. Patel: What?
- Jeetendra 'Jitubhai' B. Patel: Defective goods are always palmed off to out-of-town customers.