Walter H. White: What are you offering me?
Saul Goodman: What did Tom Hagen do for Vito Corleone?
Walter H. White: I'm no Vito Corleone.
Saul Goodman: No Shit! Right now you're Fredo!
Walter White: I have spent my whole life scared. Frightened of things that could happen; might happen; might not happen. 50 years I've spent like that. Finding myself awake at 3am. But you know what? Ever since my diagnosis, I sleep just fine. I came to realize it's that fear is the worst of it, that's the real enemy. So, get up, get out in the real world and you kick that bastard as hard as you can, right in the teeth.
Jesse Pinkman: You don't want a criminal lawyer... you want a "criminal" lawyer,
Saul Goodman: Faith and begorrah! A fellow potato eater! My real name's McGill. The Jew thing I just do for the homeboys. They all want a pipe-hitting member of the tribe, so to speak...
Walter H. White: This only works if they're scared of you
Saul Goodman: I'm gonna get you a second phone call, OK? You're gonna call your mommy or your daddy or your parish priest or your boy scout leader, and they're gonna deliver me a check for $4650.00. I'm gonna write that down on the back of my business card. Four, Six, Five, Zero, OK? And I need that in a cashiers check or a money order, doesn't matter. Actually, ah, I want it in a money order and ah, make it out to "Ice Station Zebra Associates." That's my loan out. It's totally legit... its done just for tax purposes. After that we can discuss Visa or Mastercard, but definitely not American Express, so don't even ask, alright? Any questions?
Getz: [Interrogating Badger] Hey, I'm trying to help ya here, man. Now, if you just tell me who your supplier is, I think this can end very well for you.
Saul Goodman: EHHHHH! Whaddya doin' Detective? What're you doin' talkin' to my client without me present? You Sneaky Pete! Which is which? What'd the academy hire you right outta the womb? You guys get younger every...
Saul Goodman: [Turning to Badger]
Saul Goodman: What'd you say to Babyface? Huh? Didja say anything stupid? And by "anything stupid" I mean anything at all!
Badger: I... I, uh...
Saul Goodman: Ah, look at you, mouth open, vocal chords all atwitter! Yeah, we'll talk about that later!
Saul Goodman: [Turns back to Getz]
Saul Goodman: Right now, you, OUT! TEN MINUTES AGO. There are laws, Detective, have your kindergarten teacher read 'em to ya! Right, go grab a juice box, have a nap, go on!
Saul Goodman: [Counseling Badger]
Saul Goodman: Alright, who do we have?
Badger: Brandon Mayhew.
Saul Goodman: "Brandon Mayhew." Alright. "Brandon Mayhew." Ahhhh, here we go; "public masturbation."
Saul Goodman: I don't get it, what's the kick? Why doncha do it at home like the rest of us, with a big flat-screen TV, 50 channels of pay-per-view? In a Starbucks, that's nice!
Badger: That ain't me, man! I was the guy selling meth... allegedly...
Saul Goodman: [Flipping through files... ]
Saul Goodman: Ok, alright, I gotcha. Meth, right? That was just a little transpositional error, nothin' a little white out can take care of.
Skyler White: [Skyler is about to leave for work on a Saturday morning but is wearing a sexy black dress with deep cleavage. Walt is staring at her quizzically as she prepares to leave] What?
Walter H. White: What, you don't even get casual Saturday? No, I just you... You look nice is all.