- Carly: Miss Ackerman, you don't need to yell at Freddie in front of the whole class.
- Miss Ackerman: Oh, look. More backtalk from the sass-master.
- Carly: I am not "the sass-master!" And it's wrong for you to be mean to Freddie just because your boyfriend broke up with you!
- Sam: Wow, Carls. Maybe you are the sass-master.
- Carly: Miss Ackerman?
- Miss Ackerman: Hi, Carly.
- Carly: Hi. Um, not that I'm not happy to see you, but why are you standing on my brother?
- Spencer Shay: 'Cause she has magic feet.
- Miss Ackerman: I spent six months in Thailand learning the art of back walking massage.
- Spencer Shay: [getting up] Those Thaila-manians taught you good.
- Freddie: Why can't Spencer just date her?
- Carly Shay: Because the woman is a big bottle of crazy sauce!
- Miss Ackerman: [when she is arrested at school] You set me up!
- Freddy: That's a lie!
- Carly: No, we set her up.
- Freddy: Oh, yeah.