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Stan Helsing (2009)

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It's Halloween night, and slacker video clerk Stan Helsing along with his insanely sexy ex-girlfriend , best buddy and an exotic dancer/'massage therapist' - detours into a town cursed by ... See full summary »



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Cast overview, first billed only:
Stan Helsing
Kit Zenga ...
Pleatherface (as Twan Holiday)
Travis MacDonald ...
Charles Zuckermann ...
Jeff Gulka ...


It's Halloween night, and slacker video clerk Stan Helsing along with his insanely sexy ex-girlfriend , best buddy and an exotic dancer/'massage therapist' - detours into a town cursed by the biggest monsters in movie history: Freddy, Jason , Pinhead , Leatherface , Chucky , & Michael Myers. Written by Anonymous

Plot Summary | Add Synopsis


The most feared monsters in cinematic have met their match.


Comedy | Horror

Motion Picture Rating (MPAA)

Rated R for crude and sexual content, some drug use and language | See all certifications »

Parents Guide:



Official Sites:




Release Date:

25 March 2010 (Russia)  »

Also Known As:

Mega Monster Movie  »

Company Credits

Show detailed on  »

Technical Specs


| (edited)

Sound Mix:


Aspect Ratio:

1.85 : 1
See  »

Did You Know?


The director of the film also plays the gay porn director for Cornhole Pictures in the movie. See more »


When the 18-wheeler truck cut in front of Teddy's minivan, the doors of the trailer swing open to reveal its scary contents. A minute later, when they show the back of the trailer again, the doors are closed and locked. See more »


[first lines]
Stan Helsing: [picking up a ringing phone] Schlockbuster. Happy Halloween.
Stan Helsing: Yeah yeah yeah, we carry porn.
Stan Helsing: What do I recommend? Well... "Schindler's Fist", "How Stella Got Her Tube Packed", "Six Degrees of Penatration". This is a good one. "Glad He Ate Her".
Stan Helsing: Yeah, yeah, okay. You're welcome, Grandma.
See more »

Crazy Credits

The makeup department is listed in the end credits with humorous nicknames like "Jeny 'Puppet-Sex' Cassady" and "Werner 'Monkey Gland' Pretorius"). See more »


References Shutter (2008) See more »


Where U At
Written by Johnathan Simon, Morgan Little and Tek Luciano
Performed by Tek Luciano & M.O.
See more »

Frequently Asked Questions

See more (Spoiler Alert!) »

User Reviews

Just not funny
24 August 2011 | by (Brisbane, Australia) – See all my reviews

Anyone who's followed the '(insert genre being parodied) Movie' series will know that the series has steadily gone downhill since the quite good 'Scary Movie'. While 'Stan Helsing' may have avoided the 'Movie' title, it's just as bad as the worst of the preceding films.

The barely-there plot involves four friends, Stan Helsing (Steve Howey), Nadine (Diora Baird), Teddy (Kenan Thompson) and Mia (Desi Lydic). On the way to a Halloween party, they are stranded in an isolated town and eventually forced to fight 'parodies' of six famous movie monsters Freddy, Jason, Leatherface, Chucky, Pinhead and Mike Myers.

The problem with SH is it's just not funny. While meant to be a parody of monster movies, the six monsters aren't given enough screen time to justify the parody. The main characters are lazy stereotypes: Stan is a commitment-phobic slacker who refuses to believe his destiny as Van Helsing, Nadine is the bitchy ex-girlfriend (unfortunatley for Baird, her performance is overshadowed by her breasts, which are on disply throughout the film), Mia is the ridiciously stupid and incredibly slutty blonde (though, to Lydic's credit, she at least goes about with a smile on her face). Finally, Teddy is the typical jive-talking token black guy even though Thompson is quite funny and could be even better with a half-decent script. The biggest indignity falls to comedy legend Leslie Nielsen, who spends the entire film in drag.

Like previous films, it reverts to gross-out humour and lots of sexual references for laughs and it comes off as desperate.

Even if, like me, you see these films as a guilty pleasure despite their poor quality, 'Stan Helsing' is still disappointing.

5 of 7 people found this review helpful.  Was this review helpful to you?

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