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6/10
Full-fledged throwback to the golden age of slasher films
Simon_Says_Movies21 March 2009
A movie titled My Bloody Valentine is clearly non trying to pander to art house crowds, nor does it even seem to be reaching for a higher ilk in the horror genre, but while appearing as a fully tacky horror movie entry (a 3-D remake) My Bloody Valentine succeeds in avoiding and ultimately reviving the never ending pitfalls of such films; a strong, unique opening and a surprising and completely plausible, non-ridiculous finale.

Unfortunately the movie is not as strong as its bookend acts, but it is certainly gory, fun, terrifying, tense and nothing but entertaining. (And yes, there is also nudity). The use of the trademark, in your face, 3-D tactics is mostly restrained, although it seems that director Patrick Lussier (who has mostly been in horror movie limbo since he directed Dracula 2000) could not avoid the intermittent pickaxe to the screen. The performances are actually quite strong, and while this is becoming more the norm in horror films, MBV even forgoes the smart-alecky, prankster character which removes the propensity for us to be taken out of the film.

The unique opening is actually a three-tier start. Flashing newsreels reveal that the collapse of the Hanniger Mine in a small town which claimed the lives of 6 miners (Or was it something else that killed the men?). Awakening from a comma years later, the sole survivor of the cave-in, Harry Warden, picks up where he left off, slaying dozens before being killed himself concluding what the town dubbed the Valentines Day Massacre. But all is not what it seems, as 10 years later Tom Hanniger (Jensen Ackles), a near-victim of Warden, returns to the small town to sell the mine but the killings suspiciously begin once again and it is up to Tom to clear his name.

My Bloody Valentine is a full-fledged throwback to the golden age of slasher films, like Friday the 13th (and is ironically better then the Friday remake this year) and never for a single second tries to be anything it's not and in doing so, it ultimately becomes something it shouldn't be; fun.

6.5 / 10.0

Read all my reviews at: simonsaysmovies.blogspot.com
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8/10
Expect the expected...
Pete Simone (ps42)15 January 2009
My Bloody Valentine 3D is one of those really rare kinds of horror flicks. It delivers buckets of gore, brisk pacing, and a lot of in your face 3D goodness. Sit close to the front of your theater for the maximum effect (if you dare!). There is brutality in king size portions, sure to satisfy the most hardcore of horror fans. They really pull out all the stops with that pickaxe's of his.

Perhaps most importantly though, the production and marketing teams were aware of what it what it was. At its core, its a cheesy mindless slasher film, and rather than try to overcome this, My Bloody Valentine acknowledges this trait and works with it. It owns it. Internet ads bore slogans such as 'Its actually 4D if you're wasted.' Never does it get bogged down trying to patch together an airtight story. It just keeps its unrelenting pace up from start to finish, and delivers what the audience came out to see, gratuitous violence.

A film like this is quite refreshing for the genre, not because it is artful by any means, but because it embraces its inherent trashiness. By deliberately failing to take itself seriously, My Bloody Valentine becomes something more than the majority of its peers can ever be. It becomes fun in the same way that a Poison concert or monster truck rally is fun. Take my advice and see this thing as it was meant to be seen, through beer goggles and a pair of cheap 3D glasses. Enjoy it for what it is and don't worry about the second thoughts you might have tomorrow morning.
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6/10
About what you expect, and that's not all bad!
TOMASBBloodhound16 January 2009
Warning: Spoilers
This is a remake of a Canadian horror film that I grew up with and is still very dear to me. Even though I don't think they make great horror films these days, the 3D gimmick was too much to pass up. And it's nice to see that the original motivated someone to try and remake it. That said, this film is nothing extraordinary, but worth it if you have some time to kill. And be prepared to pay extra since this is a 3D film. They charged me an extra two bucks for the glasses. It isn't often you pay $9.50 for a movie at 3 in the afternoon, but what the hell.

The film is faithful to the original in a few ways. Using many of the same names and the mining community for the setting. The story centers around the aftermath of a violent rampage by a coal miner ten years earlier. And a spate of grisly new killings that coincide with the arrival of a young man who left town at the time the original murders took place. Is it just a coincidence, or is the young man picking up where the murderous miner left off? This time around, the script has a lot more going on than in the original. Sometimes a bit too much, but the action is spread out to more locations than just the creepy old mine. There is a very strong amount of gore that the original sorely lacked (thank you Paramount). You will see people mangled in just about every way you can kill someone with a pick ax. This film even recycles the dead body in the dryer shot from the original, too. It seems like they made a point to be much more graphic for the fans who had always complained about too much gore cut out from the 1981 version. And the 3D was a nice treat. It looked very good, even from the rear of the theater where I was seated. And a man in full mining gear is still a very scary sight.

I expected problems with the script, and I was correct to do so. Much of the dialog is very weak, and it seems like they used a test audience to pick the actual killer since it really could have been either of two people. Some of the acting was more than passable, and it was good to see Tom Atkins working again. The locations above ground were more lush and not as economically depressed as they looked in the original. And this kind of hurts when it comes to creating a spooky atmosphere. There are a couple moments during fight scenes where the actions of characters produced groans from the audience due to stupidity, and I really doubt the county sheriff of such a supposedly impoverished area could afford such a nice home and a housekeeper. I guess the film was still as good as I thought it could be, and I'm not a worse person for having seen it. 6 of 10 stars.

The Hound.
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7/10
3D is not this slasher movie's only saving grace.....
xamtaro14 October 2009
Years ago, in the town of Harmony, a horrible mining accident occurred, due in part to the negligence of young Tom Hannigar. Five men were found dead and one, Harry Warden, in a coma. It soon came to light that Harry Warden killed those men to conserve his own air supply. On valentine's day, Harry mysteriously awakens from his coma and goes on a killing spree and ultimately met his end at the hands of the town sheriff, But not before confronting the main characters Axel(Kerr Smith), Sarah(Jamie King) and her boyfriend Tom Hannigar(Jensen Ackles) who still harbors the guilt of causing the accident in the first place. Years pass, teenagers become adults and have families. Suddenly, mysterious killings start to happen again with a very familiar M.O; killed by a man in a mining outfit, similar to Harry Warden's. Axel and Sarah are now married but there is trouble brewing in paradise. To complicate matters, Tom Hannigar returned to Harmony and where he goes, the mysterious killings follow.

Is some deranged copycat killer out to make a name for himself by repeating the tragedy from 10 years ago? Or has Harry Warden come back from the grave to exact his revenge on Tom Hannigar and everyone close to him?

For the first time, i surprise even myself by saying that i liked the story. Or at least i was mildly hooked by it. Usually stories in such slasher horror remakes are bland and shoved aside in order to focus more on silly teenage shenanigans and gruesome killings. The story of My Bloody Valentine plays with the "mystery" element very well, throwing many red herrings and misleading little clues as to the identity of the killer. Literally everyone is a suspect and this film keeps you guessing up until the final reveal. There is even a small(though weak, but passable) attempt at a tragic love triangle between the 3 main characters which ties in rather well with the whole "valentine" theme of the movie.

The characters are at least more bearable than the usual slasher movie fare and easier to get into, emotionally. The acting may be a little stiff at times but i did not expect much good acting from horror genre movies.

A mystery story would only work one time around(once you know the ending, the mystery element kinda ends there), so is it worth watching this movie again on DVD or blu ray??? I give it a resounding yes thanks to.......you guessed it, the 3D gimmick.

It has been said many times over that the 3D gimmick coupled with some fresh new ways to kill off characters is the highlight of this movie. I never knew one could get so creative with a pickaxe and shovel. The gore itself is not gratuitous but the kills are shockingly gruesome and some of them rather unique.(my favorite is when the killer shoved a shovel into a girl's mouth and cleaved her face in half). Really must hand it to director Patrick Lussier(also directed Dracula 2000) for his clear straightforward directing style which keeps the usual frantic cuts to a minimum and allows the violence to be played out in its full gory.....i mean glory.

Of course, what would a slasher film be without some mandatory nudity? Thankfully, the nudity is played more for laughs than to titillate here as a dumb blond runs around a motel and car park, completely buck naked in the middle of the night, trying to confront her boyfriend and then trying to escape the killer.

In retrospect, My Bloody Valentine actually plays out like an extremely violent episode of Scooby Doo complete with surprise ending and unmasking. There were some issues with the overall "feel" of the non-3D portions of the film which felt cheap and at times looked no better than a made-for-TV miniseries. Slasher genre fans are sure to love this and casual movie viewer can easily immerse themselves in the well plotted mystery and suspense.

My Bloody Valentine is a surprisingly fresh take on the slasher genre. It takes familiar elements and adds a new twist to it. This movie among other recent slasher remakes is like a breath of fresh air after spending hours in a gas mask. Definitely one of the better ones in the market. Maybe there is hope for the slasher genre yet.
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8/10
Great fun!
boy_in_red16 January 2009
I missed out on the 80's 3D craze- films in the Jaws, Amityville and Friday the 13th franchises all getting 3d instalments on the big screen. Well it seems 2009 will make up for that, with My Bloody Valentine, Final Destination 4 and Pirahna all adding an extra dimension to their proceedings.

My Bloody Valentine is a great start. It's fun, gory, doesn't spend too much time on the dialogue, because it understands we're wearing these ridiculous glasses for a reason! I really enjoyed it actually- and for someone who has watched so many slashers, the 3d did add some wonderful novel touches, so it felt like more than just a retread. I know it's cool to bash remakes these days (and admittedly so many are very weak) but I much prefer this to the original- which seemed to plod along at quite a pedestrian pace, and besides the mining town setting, really didn't offer anything especially new. This film is far tighter and doesn't take itself so seriously- it has its tongue-firmly-in-cheek.

The only downsides are perhaps the stalk and kill sequence involving a naked lady. I guess some horror fans like their nudity, but in a genre so often viewed as misogynistic, it didn't do itself any favours. Admittedly the character is actually quite strong and fun- you don't feel her nudity weakens or humiliates her, but... I dunno, perhaps pandering a little too much for the teenage boys? Go catch this at the cinema, take a few friends, and enjoy an hour and a half of silly fun.
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1/10
Bloody awful.
jamesharrah26 May 2009
Warning: Spoilers
I was 17 when the original came out at the birth of the so called slasher era: "Halloween" (classic!), "Friday the 13th" (the first one, not all that trash that followed. I still cant watch it by myself at the age of 44.), "Silent Night Deadly Night", "New Years Evil", "Prom Night", the list goes on and on, and the original "My Bloody Valentine" wasn't all that bad of a movie. It had actually had some scary moments in it. Yes it was predictable as this genre of movie goes: crazed masked killer on the loose stalking teenagers!. And it was fine just like it was (as in most original movies) and did not need a remake.

I do try to give these remakes (lord I am sick to death with them) a chance to see if they can hold a candle to the original...they never do. Just gore, gore, gore for shock value or it just isn't scary at all. This movie is one of those cases. Too much gore (after awhile one gets immune to it and too much blood just makes it all the more unbelievable), the acting was terrible, suspense was non-existent, the full frontal nudity of one victim...why?, all in all it was just another stupid remake of something that was fine to begin with. Granted though I didn't watch it in 3-D, as the trailer states "A New Dimension of Terror" (I believe the exact words were used in the "Friday the 13th Part 3, 3-D"). I am sure watching it in 3-D would not have helped. It was a terrible movie. I found myself actually yawning.

Whatever happened to the horror movie that actually scared you? Things that go bump in the night, shadows in windows, someone watching you and you have no idea they are there, and the best part...you never actually see the killer till the end of the movie. "Friday the 13th" was the best as far as that scenario goes. But the masked killer? "Halloween" was the best in that department.

Remake, remake, remake. I do believe Hollywood has just gone dumb and can't come up with anything new without rehashing something that has already been done. Have yet to see a remake of anything that can even come close to the original with the exception of "King Kong". The rest is garbage. And this movie, "My Bloody Valentine" was just bloody awful.

Let me try to list some remakes:

"Halloween". Rob Zombie ruined this movie. And I like his movies. "When a Stranger Calls". Actually fell asleep watching it. "Texas Chainsaw Massacre". No raw terror there. Just stupid. "Prom Night". Check please! "Carrie". Although faithful to the book, no one can out do Sissy and Pipers' performances. "The Fly". Next! "The Shining". Was no Kubrick film that's for sure. "Friday the 13th". Have no desire to see it. "Amityville Horror". Waste of time.

I could go on and on. Hollywood? Do the public a favor and leave classics as they are...classic, and try something new.
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6/10
My Bloody Valentine 3-D A Deadly Blind Date
MichaelRAllen17 January 2009
The use of three dimensional effects have not been a part of cinema for over twenty years, with IMAX the exception, but now it is back and better than ever in 2009. During "My Bloody Valentine 3-D," the audience will experience large pickaxes, flying bullets and tree limbs coming out of the screen and into your lap. At times the effect seems gimmicky as the story forces the occurrence of projectiles moving through the air and other times the three dimensional effects hit it just right. When you see the film you will know when the effect works; the mesmerizing visuals are sometimes jaw-dropping, literally.

Writers Tom Farver and Zane Smith keep the pace up throughout "My Bloody Valentine 3-D," right until the end when it appears that a miner, with grievances will take on a whole town. Right from the beginning the story starts off with a woman on the run from a mysterious figure, behind a breathing mask who seems to delight in wrecking other people's good time. The start to the movie is explosive and the film does not back down from creating a suspenseful horror flick that is simply out to horrify and be fun. At times the dialogue or introduction of characters into scenes comes off as slightly campy, but the delivery of lines in each scene is generating intensity for the final climactic act.

The plot of this horror film is somewhat conventional with Tom Hanniger returning to his hometown in order to heal some past misgivings at the hands of a bloody serial killer. "My Bloody Valentine 3-D," mostly centres on the character of Tom Hanniger, with Sarah and Axel Palmer supporting. Adding enough smaller characters to keep the story complex and creating enough diverging plot lines to keep things tight "My Bloody Valentine 3-D," does a good job of keeping the killer's identity mysterious while piquing viewer's curiosity. Instead of going for a closed box Hollywood ending the film slightly steps it up by leaving the ending open for a sequel. Some of the most successful film franchises come from the horror genre and "My Bloody Valentine 3-D," might be trying to capitalize on future returns by delivering a plot twist that slightly disappoints.

Lighting, environments, and music are all spot on, only the overacting of certain characters distracts from an otherwise excellent horror film. Many of the scenes within "My Bloody Valentine 3-D," take place in darkly lit mine shafts or the interiors of houses, at night and the overall tone feels like a thriller while showing enough gore to entertain horror fans. The music in the film is subtle enough while picking up the pace slightly during action sequences. On the other hand, the musical score of "My Bloody Valentine 3-D," could have been much more eerie in order to build up further tension. The acting of Jaimie King comes off as pretentious and somewhat naive while Kerr Smith, appearing to take his role of a small time sheriff a little too seriously displays some awkwardness. The rest of the actors including veterans; Tom Atkins and Kevin Tighe play their smaller parts well; Jensen Ackles, could have taken a darker approach to his character, in order to truly deliver a role of someone who is struggling with the trauma of past brutal events but the portrayal is still good.

Overall "My Bloody Valentine 3-D," delivers an entertaining ride through dark alleys, mine shafts and the evil minds of writers Todd Farmer and Zane Smith. Slightly on the lighter side of the horror genre this film develops enough jump scares, with the help of three dimensional effects to deliver a fun and fast 101 minutes. See this one with a friend and laugh out loud when a 20' branch comes screaming at your head (and try not to duck)! 6 Mesmerizing Skulls out of 10.
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10/10
Yes, Yes, Yes! The Live-Action Digital 3-D Revolution Begins...
nconstab15 January 2009
My Bloody Valentine 3-D pulled out all the stops and is every bit worth the ticket price.

I admit that my expectations were pretty low at first, but as a horror fan and a 3-D fan, I went to the theater anyway not trying to get my hopes up too much.

From the very beginning, the story, action, and the visuals hooked me into it with lots of twists, turns, and shocks. Digital 3-D movies over the past few years have only offered family films or animation in 3-D.

Finally, Live-Action Digital 3-D that WORKS!! A MUST see movie if you like blood, gore, and full nudity; all in 3-D! A few story problems in the third act but everything else makes up for it. The movie is meant to be fun anyway, and it was!

Bravo to the filmmakers for making this movie entertaining and visually stunning. We are off to a great start in 3-D movies!
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7/10
My Bloody Valentine 3-D (2009) ***
JoeKarlosi19 January 2009
Remake of the 1981 slasher film about a maniac in a coal miner's outfit slaughtering everyone, and a worthy retread of the original. These days there has been a return of sorts to the unrestrained gory days of early '80s slasher films, and this one delivers in all those typical categories you'd expect -- the over-the-top mutilations and gore sequences, the gratuitous sex (including full frontal female nudity) and people getting theirs in a variety of inventive ways. At least it's a step up in that the main cast and victims are not just silly teenagers, but rather silly 20-somethings and older this time out. And it is a very nice bonus getting a return from old timer Tom Atkins as a retired policeman in the mix, too.

This film is also released in standard flat 2-D, but I would only have awarded it **1/2, if not for the added gimmick of third dimension, which is really what the fun is all about here. The 3-D effects are well done, seeing things fly off the screen and into your face. One wonders whether they might have taken this even farther with more deliberate situations designed to fully utilize the effect, but what's there is still cool. The "mystery" of the film kept me going back and forth in my guesstimates, up to the final second, so that was an added bonus to the usual trappings that worked for me. *** out of ****
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2/10
Almost awful!
bsvends117 June 2009
Well, I didn't expect much, but I didn't expect it to be as bad as it actually is! This movie have nothing to offer except some graphic killings, and it seems this is the whole point of making the movie. Maybe it's fun to make gory scenes and maybe the producer thought - hey lets have fun and see if someone will pay to see what we made. The acting is bad to the point of laughable, it's poorly directed and basically you just end up laughing at all the stupidity. Then, maybe this is the point, maybe it's made bad to make fun of the genre or the audience. I don't know, it sure isn't worth watching! You would think they could be a little bit more inventive and creative, it's not that hard! The fact that some people give this movie 10 stars is disturbing!
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10/10
st. valentine's day massacre
kai ringler23 September 2009
in a coal mining town a mining accident has taken place and 22 workers are trapped below, one survives. but how?? apparently he killed the other miners for their air.. how ingenious,, i mean if you're all gonna die , i guess that would be an option,, so flash forward , year it's the anniversary of the mine collapse, and murders, harry is in a coma, at the hospital.. he wakes up and he is highly p' od , he goes on a rampage killing almost everyone involved.. but he misses the owner's son, the owner is the one responsible for the mine collapse, they think this tme the got dear old " harry " the owner's son goes away and comes back 10 years later to sell the mine, that's when the killings start again,, but is it harry is it the sheriff,, or tom,, or one of the townspeople even,, lot's of good stuff here in this one.
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7/10
He'll Break Your Heart
moviewizguy16 January 2009
Warning: Spoilers
Tom returns to his hometown on the tenth anniversary of the Valentine's night massacre that claimed the lives of 22 people. Wearing a miner's mask and armed with a pickaxe, an unstoppable killer is on the loose. Instead of a homecoming, however, Tom finds himself suspected of committing the murders.

Seeing my first 2009 horror film, let alone film, this year, I can tell horror movies are looking promising this year. I'll admit it. The film didn't surpass my expectations, but that isn't fair, since I set the bar up unusually high for these types of films. Yes, I would have never seen this film in theaters if it weren't in 3D. If you're thinking to watch it in 2D, DON'T! Spend the extra $2.50 (or more) because the extra fee is worthwhile. If you don't have a theater with 3D screenings near you, all I can say is that the film will not be as good as if it were in 3D and I stand by this statement.

With that warning out of the way, I'll say this is one of the most fun times I've ever had of watching a horror film in theaters. The 3D factor is just an icing on top of a red velvet cake. As a slasher fan myself, I found the film entertaining. I had myself laughing from death scenes that are sometimes ridiculously over-the-top, the gore, the gratuitous nudity, and the horror clichés. This must mean the film is poking fun of itself as a slasher genre or it must mean we're back in the 1980's. I'll go with the latter. But really, does that really matter?

The plot was fun, but in films like these, it doesn't really matter either. I had a grand time guessing who's the killer and who's not, just to have myself getting slapped in the face back. It will literally keep you guessing until the end and even if the conclusion has been done several million times before, one will wonder why one would fall for it again. The 3D gimmicks were great and sometimes shocking. You see human body parts flying in your face. You flinch when a pickaxe come flying in your way. It's just that great.

I had a mix reaction with the performances. Jensen Ackles was decent, although I had myself laughing from his odd performance. Fortunately, Kerr Smith and Jaime King did a better job. Betsy Rue, the actress who would show her body in full frontal nudity for five minutes in a part of the movie does her part so well that you forget about the nudity (barely). The score is also better than in many other horror films because, really, horror films these days usually have annoying, loud rock songs playing in the background for no apparent reason.

In the end, you should really watch, or consider to watch, this film in 3D if you're interested. The kills are great, there's some suspense, and the 3D aspect is really mixed well with the movie that you will have a fun time watching it. If you're expecting something original, don't bother watching it. However, if you like slashers that are similar to those in the past, do yourself a favor and watch it.
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10/10
Bloody brilliant 3D experience and a pretty good movie
springsunnywinter15 January 2009
Warning: Spoilers
My Bloody Valentine 3D is a remake of the 1981 Canadian slasher film of the same name which I never heard of before this movie was released. The film will have a 3-D theatrical release and is the first film released in Real D which is the main reason why I intended to see this movie because I have never seen a movie in 3D before and I generally like horror movies.

Ten years ago, a tragedy changed the town of Harmony forever. Tom Hanniger (Jensen Ackles), an inexperienced coal miner, caused an accident in the tunnels that trapped and killed five men and sent the only survivor, Harry Warden (Richard John Walters), into a coma. But Harry Warden wanted revenge. Exactly one year later, on Valentine's Day, he woke up and brutally murdered twenty-two people with a pick axe before being killed.

Ten years later, Tom Hanniger returns to Harmony on Valentine's Day, still haunted by the deaths he caused. Struggling to make amends with his past, he grapples with unresolved feelings for his ex-girlfriend, Sarah (Jaime King), who is now married to his best friend, Axel (Kerr Smith), the town sheriff. But tonight, after years of peace, something from Harmony's dark past has returned. Wearing a miner's mask and armed with a pick axe, an unstoppable killer is on the loose. And as his footsteps come ever closer, Tom, Sarah and Axel realise in terror that it just might be Harry Warden who's come back to claim them...

The 3D experience was amazing and so lifelike which seems like that it is really happening. The movie was pretty good that was best viewed at the 3D theatre although it is another slasher movie which has been tackled a lot of times in Hollywood but I had no problem with it because I had a good time watching it. It is not the kind of film that is going to appeal to everyone and it is best not to take it too seriously. I would recommend it to people who liked movies like Scream. The story is simple and the cast is unknown but it is better that way because then you can just concentrate on the mystery. Overall if want a good 3D experience and/or like horror slasher film then My Bloody Valentine is the movie for you.
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6/10
Entertaining Collection of Clichés
Claudio Carvalho11 June 2009
In the mining town of Harmony, there is an accident caused by the son of the owner Tom Hanniger (Jensen Ackles) during a drilling, and the mine collapses burying six miners alive. The rescue team finds only Harry Warden alive but in coma and the other miners murdered punched by his pickax, and they conclude that Harry killed them to save oxygen for himself. On the Valentine's Day, Harry awakes from the coma in the local hospital, and he kills twenty-two persons, including a group of teenagers that are partying in the mine. Harry is killed by the deputy but the only survivors are Tom Hanniger, his girlfriend Sarah (Jaime King), their friend Axel Palmer (Kerr Smith) and another girl. Ten years later, Tom returns to Harmony after the death of his father decided to sell the Hanniger Mine, and finds that Sarah has married Axel, now the local sheriff, and they have a son. On the Valentine's Day, Harry Warden also returns seeking revenge against those that had escaped from his pickax in the past, and Tom is accused by Axel and other locals.

The slasher "My Bloody Valentine" is an entertaining collection of clichés that keeps tension until the last scene despite being predictable. The greatest attraction of this forgettable feature seems to be the effects of 3D in movie theaters. I have watched at home on DVD and I had lots of fun with the silly and manipulative plot. My vote is six.

Title (Brazil): "Dia dos Namorados Macabro" ("Macabre Valentine's Day")
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10/10
Fantastic!
fantasywriter10116 January 2009
I loved this movie! I went into it with low expectations but with high hopes and boy did they deliver.

The gore was extreme but well placed and the 3D just plain rocked. The acting was well done with great performances by both Jensen Ackles and Kerr Smith. Every twist and turn left me tense and guessing. The pace never slowed, thus keeping me on the edge of my seat the entire time. The ending tied up the loose ends nicely but still left room for a sequel, if the director is so inclined. The bit of a cliffhanger at the end was well done without being too melodramatic yet being complete enough to where another movie is not needed.

I will definitely be seeing this again soon!
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2/10
Would not even scare a baby
Bigg_Bad4 May 2009
I was not expecting a lot from this movie and yet I was still disappointed. The directing is so god awful it's actually painful to watch and the reason for me saying this is that every single shot is a missed opportunity. It's like they intentionally looked at the scene and said wow it would be really scary if we filmed from these angles, with this lighting and these sound effects and background music....and the went in the complete opposite direction. This might all be on purpose because the movie studio thought it would make more money on a cheesy movie that even the biggest wuss would dare to see.

Besides all this it lacks several of the other key elements:

1. Bad character development - you don't care about the characters at all or relate to them.

2. Lame killer - No reason for him killing the people (Yes a killer with no motives can be scary, but it's very hard to pull off and this movie doesn't come close...at all) And also no reason for the way a does it and no back story.

3. Just generally a poor story that seems half baked and with lots plot holes and stupid ideas.

So to sum up...NO ! this is not a good movie.

I really love horror movies and I hope someone will come along and bring the genre back on track (Basically it's needs the Begins/Dark Knight treatment...In which I mean it has to be a serious project for all the parties involved)
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1/10
Possibly one of the worst movies I've ever seen.
notyetawoman25 January 2009
My Saturday was going wonderful, then I meet a few friends at the local movie theater to find out we're seeing My Bloody Valentine. I say "whatever", buy my ticket, grab my 3D glasses, and sit down.

The movie starts and gets into the blood and guts almost immediately, which is so abundant throughout the film that it starts becoming comical. I sit here giving the film the benefit of the doubt, hoping that somewhere throughout this god-awful movie a solid story will form that will at least half catch my attention. Unfortunately, that never happened. I sat through an hour of corny dialogue and predictable storyline before I got up and walked out of the room.

This is a horrible movie and not worth straining your eyes with those stupid glasses you have to wear.
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Real Throwback to the 80's
Michael_Elliott16 January 2009
My Bloody Valentine 3-D (2009)

*** (out of 4)

Remake of the 1981 slasher has a maniac minor killing twenty-two people but ten years later more bodies start to pile up. Is it a copycat killer or has the original come back for more revenge? I'll start off by saying that I'm not a big fan of the original and I'll go even further by saying this one here, story wise, isn't that good. It's more like a two-and-a-half star movie thanks to its throwback to the 80's slashers but the 3-D effects are what really makes it worth seeing. The story has some logical issues to say the least and this includes the identity of the killer, which is pretty impossible considering what you've seen throughout the film. With that said, the movie certainly goes all out in terms of violence and gore. I was pleasantly shocked at how gory this thing was as we get all sorts of graphic killings ranging from picks through the eyes, necks, heads, decapitations and much much more. The red stuff is constantly flowing so I'm sure gore hands are going to be very happy. The film also goes back a few decades in terms of nudity because there's some full frontal female nudity, which we haven't seen in a horror film in a very long time. It seems a lot of slashers today play it safe but that's certainly not the case here. The film goes all out and that includes the 3-D effects. The "Real3D" process is certainly the greatest I've seen and I'm sure others will be very impressed. There are a couple classic scenes with various objects floating at you with one of the best early on when the killer throws his weapon towards the camera. Thankfully the director knew these effects would be the main draw here and he constantly keeps the stuff coming at the screen. Unlike many 3-D movies there's nothing here done for comic relief as the film uses the effects to show off the gore and violence. We get some smaller stuff like one character spitting at the camera but for the most part it's murder and mayhem. The performances are what you'd expect from a film like this but it was great fun seeing Tom Atkins in the cast. Many horror buffs will know him from films like Halloween 3 but it's nice to see him here. In the end, the film certainly doesn't stand out as a classic but you know what to expect when you walk into this. The movie isn't a total success but there are certain things horror and 3-D fans want and this film delivers them.
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8/10
Harry Warden is back....
harleyburnett24 February 2016
Warning: Spoilers
"My Bloody Valentine 3D" is a marvelous rendition of an 80's classic updated with care to create one of the best "remakes" out there. The film does not stray to far from its predecessor yet adds to it in a visually stunning form. Even in 2-D it shines as though it were made back in the 80s! The character development is what I enjoyed the most as it gave a nice change from topless blonde teens running to their deaths. The coal miner "Harry Warden" awakens from his one year coma and wreaks havoc but for a short period as he is gunned down later on. Ten years pass and the town of Harmony wants to forget about this terrible event in their history. Tom Hanniger returns to town to sell his fathers mining facility and catches up with the townsfolk only for a mysterious man in a coal miner outfit to show up and begin a murdering spree. Is it Harry Warden back from the dead or an impostor? The plot to this film is average but the kills are great. I recommend this movie to anyone looking for a great night of fright and suspense.
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1/10
And the new worst film of all time is.....MY BLOODY VALENTINE!
Phillip McDowell26 March 2009
First of all, I have long thought my bottom 6 movies were: XXX: State of the Union, Gigli, Speend 2: Cruise Control, Astronauts wife, Alexander and the worst of the worst AVP:REQUIM. Now after watching MY BLOODY VALENTINE I have to say "it is the worst by a lot". it was so bad I have to say it twice, "IT IS THE WORST BY A LOT"!! What makes it so bad was it had the potential to be a great horror movie. The first 8 minutes of the movie was the best part of the movie because it Del with events that happened from the first movie. After that, it went down the tank FAST!! If not for the fact my wife was sleeping pretty sound in the movie I would have got up and left. listen to what I say, "DO NOT GO SEE THIS MOVIE, don't buy the DVD or if you you have the chance to get it for free decline it.
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7/10
Jensen Ackles Fan will Love this movie.
greyxnights16 January 2009
I went to this movie, not expecting anything grand or special. The only reason I did go was so that I could see Jensen Ackles on the big screen. I am a big Supernatural fan, and I was excited to see him, not so much the movie.

Overall, the story line was decent. It has been done before so it's nothing that is going to blow you away. It was a typical slasher film with lots and lots of gore (very gruesome gore), and sex and nudity, which is something I did find to be a tad bit unnecessary for the film and something I frowned upon. The scene (only one) could have been done exactly the same with clothes...there was no real point to nudity.

Anyway, the 3D was very cool, and I would suggest seeing it in 3D. It doesn't make you dizzy and it isn't overpowering as if to take away from the story. The 3D was done tastefully.

Acting was alright. Jensen Ackles and Kerr Smith did a good job as main actors for the role. The rest were...decent. Special Effects was actually...really, really good. One scene in particular I actually really, really loved (towards the end, Jensen and Lights....that's all I'll say..XD) Overall, the movie was decent...better than I had thought. However, if Jensen hadn't been in this movie, I doubt I would have gone to see it. But, fellow Supernatural fans and Ackles Lovers, you will definitely enjoy watching Jensen on the big screen, I guarantee it.
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10/10
Fantastic 3-D Slasher! - Very mild spoiler
artic_vixen16 January 2009
Warning: Spoilers
Saw an advanced screening of My Bloody Valentine 3-D last night at 10pm.

What a cool movie! Okay, so basic plot is this guy goes on a psycho rampage in a mine and (very minor spoiler ahead) kills everyone he can get his axe into....except for one guy who is spared due to cops showing up and saving the day by shooting the guy. But he runs out of the mine and no one speaks of him again. Flash forward ten years and killings have begun again. So, automatically, people in the town think that it is the same psycho killer from ten years ago. But they killed him. Didn't they? A trip to the place where he was buried shows no sign of a body and now the mystery begins of is it really the killer from before? If so, did he rise from the dead? Or was he never dead? Or do we have a copycat on our hands? I'm not much of a slasher type movie fan. Couldn't have given two rips about the Jason or Michael Myers series at the beginning of their respective chains (although, I am finding myself enjoying the remakes of these), but even though this was filled (and I DO mean FILLED) with gore sequences, this was a very enjoyable and intriguing storyline...along with having the kick butt 3-D effects, of course! I think the second biggest jump moment for me was the scene from the trailer where he throws the axe and it hits the windshield of the car...that really did look like it was gonna hit me. :] The first biggest, I won't spoil it, but it was really close to the beginning and it totally hit me by surprise.

I should probably mention that there's some very nice eye candy for both sexes. All of the girls dress like sluts, whether intentional or "accidental" (what was with the denim cut off skirt where the pockets hung down below the skirt...ugh, how tacky...and the man's flannel shirt with one button too many undone was common...oh and the very first scene, it is almost impossible not to stare at her chest the entire scene because she is wearing a two sizes too small white t-shirt with a black bra underneath...or at least, it looks like it's black...she never takes her shirt off) and there is a scene where you have full frontal for quite a bit of time while the one girl is running for her life and thankfully since you're seeing her for such a long time, she at least has a very nice body. Then the guys...oh, man, I was having a hard time picking out which one to drool over more...Kerr Smith was looking F-I-N-E and Jensen Ackles always has this something yummy about him that comes through when he speaks. (I'm such a sucker for the 5 o'clock shadow look.) One quick note in general about going to see a 3-D movie. As a suggestion...make sure to sit in the center of whatever row you sit in. This evening, I, stupidly, decided that I was determined not to have anyone sitting in front of me, so I picked the second row back, right behind the bars, so I could put my feet up and there was no chair in front of the bars for me to have to worry about that. However, by doing this, even though the effects were still really cool, I didn't really feel like I was enjoying the full effect of the 3-D experience. I had the emergency lights on the floor right next to me and because it wasn't as dark, it was more like watching just a regular movie. So, I assure you, I WILL be seeing this movie again tonight...and I am quite positive that the 3-D experience will be that much better.

And for all the horror fans who WILL go see this movie, make damned sure that you stay til the very, very, very end. I promise you, you will not regret it. Was this really a horror movie, though? I mean, we're not talking occult...the killer wasn't possessed by a demon or anything. He was just deranged. This stuff could really happen! That makes it more of a thriller in my book.

Anyway, highly recommended, must-see for 3-D fans, slasher movie enthusiasts, or just anyone who likes a good whodunit, since you're kept guessing til the very last scene. Yes, I would go see it, even it wouldn't have been offered in 3-D (I really liked the storyline), but as long as it's still playing in 3-D, you owe it to yourself to find that theater that is showing it and wait to see the "regular" version when it comes out on DVD. Hopefully, though, 3-D will be offered on DVD as well.

PLEASE for the sake of your kids' sanity and to be courteous to the other people trying to enjoy the movie, leave the rug rats at home for this one. Not one scene is appropriate for them and your theater mates would greatly appreciate NOT having to tune out your baby crying and screaming (like one was doing last night at my viewing).

I can't wait to see this again in about 4 hours!

Vixy :]
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7/10
Excellent journey of gore and suspense, what are you waiting for? Go see it!!
Warning: Spoilers
Taking a good look at the two heavily populated cinema 'lives' of the slasher genre, the most striking similarity in both is that they were started by the box office successes of two stand-out features. First Halloween in 78 launched a tidal wave of wannabes that included the much maligned but equally heavily imitated Friday the 13th series. The category had a good run, but eventually lost popularity mid-way through the eighties due to a restriction on gore and a lack of funding and creativity from production teams. Wes Craven's popular semi-parody, Scream from 1996, kicked off yet another major influx that sent the imitations crawling out of the woodwork and on to video-store shelves. Eventually, a lack of originality meant audiences and studios alike gave up on the cycle and it befell a similar fate that had sent its forefathers into obscurity.

There were thirteen years between the death of the Halloween-inspired glory days and Scream's unexpected re-birth, so a believer in destiny may indeed be forgiven for predicting the time is upon us for another run of masked killers and gratuitous gore.

It has been a good few months for fans of the original My Bloody Valentine. Not only have we learned that we will finally be able to see the full uncut version of the original, repackaged on a shiny new DVD with extras, but also we have been treated to this highly financed remake at a time when the category had pretty much sunk to the lowest of depths.

Harry Warden's name lives long in the memories of the townsfolk of a small town in West Virginia after he went on a maniacal killing spree, butchering 22 people on a cold valentine's night. Despite rumours that he was buried alive in the mines that he stalked, the body of the maniac has never been discovered. Fast forward ten years and it seems that the evil has returned, because a gas-masked maniac begins stalking the village and killing everyone that was somehow connected to the original massacre. Has Harry returned?

As the title accurately informs us, a key gimmick for the release of this remake was the fact that it is filmed in explosive 3D. Now many have tried to bring horror into the third-dimension, but the likes of Friday the 13th III, Silent Madness and Freddy's Dead had failed drastically to make the most of an ingenious tool in the creation of supreme virtual terror. So with all that was riding against it, does My Bloody Valentine 3D actually deliver??

Like hell it does! Buckle your seat belts baby and prepare yourself for a speed-train through slasher clichés that has never been taken to such extreme heights. This is a non-stop juggernaut of fast-paced gore and shock tactics that will keep your heart beating at the speed of a Japanese freeway. You can mock the brainless script and the at times overly-gratuitous exploitation, but this is a slasher movie and slasher movies exist to give you two-hours of freedom from the stress of everyday life in a virtual-world where you can leave your brains at the door.

Firstly, the film is immensely gory. So much so that even a hardened old horror-addict like myself was cowering from the screen in places. Pick-axes through faces, dismemberment, eyes popping out of their sockets; and best of all, it's all filmed in fantastic 3D. This is a car-crash of over indulgence that has the balls to drive to the borders of cinematic acceptability and then smash through them with its pedal to the medal. The pace is unrelenting and the suspense at times absolutely immense. Patrick Lussier may not be the next Hitchcock, but MBV 3D is not to be categorised alongside Psycho or Halloween. This is a film that sets out to shock in any way possible and on that level it succeeds. There's one or two tense jump out of your seat jolts and a few credibly created scares that are all the better for the stylish production.

The cast do a good enough job of keeping the plot moving fluidly and the healthy financing means that no expense has been spared in the producer's effort to unleash total mayhem on audiences. Jamie King takes us back to the Laurie Strode/Ginny Field era of brave heroines, but somewhat authentically, she also has huge character flaws. The story shares much with its predecessor and Lussier also re-uses many of the scenes that made Mihalka's hit so memorable. This may well be the first slasher remake that actually pays credit to its heritage and unlike Rob Zombie's insulting Halloween re-hash, MBV 3D can sit comfortably alongside its grandfather.

It's not fashionable to give a slasher movie a good review and I can see without looking the piles of one-star write-ups that are cluttering up column-space in the self-righteous brigade's film magazines. I bet that Egbert is having a field day ripping this particular movie to shreds. Agreed, this is not an intellectual film. To be fair, in some places it doesn't even do the basics right and there's some shockingly poor plot holes towards the climax.For a fan of splatter flicks however, this is an hour and a half in paradise and I really enjoyed every moment of this long-overdue gore-soaked extravaganza.

This is not the next Shawshank Redemption and it has no intention of trying to be, so it should be judged on its merits as a gore film and on that level it is everything that you want it to be. Full frontal nudity, buckets of gore and all the things that your mama warned you about rapped up in a tense and riveting thriller with the added bonus of an intelligent twist (Was the killer really the only bad guy? I wouldn't call the 'hero' good...) Prepare for the next invasion folks
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A Bloody Mess!
rascal6711 July 2011
This has got to be one of the worst remakes of a classic 80's slasher\horror film I have seen. I would consider the original 'My Bloody Valentine - 81' to be one of the better slashers of the early 80's period. It was no 'Halloween - 78', but it was full of atmosphere and had plenty of style to boot—this rancid remake was just an insult to my intelligence.

There is better acting seen on a daytime TV soap opera. The cinematography and lighting were flat and uninspired ( I am aware it was filmed for 3D, but even this isn't an improvement over watching the 2D version of the film) and the gore and violence didn't have any real impact due to the terrible characterization. If it was intended as a parody of the original version or slasher films in general, it failed miserably because it was so damn boring and uninteresting. Do many of these modern horror film makers have any real passion or appreciation of what makes a decent horror flick become a perennial favorite??? The producers of this travesty certainly had no vision except maybe of their wallets.

Avoid at all costs. You have been warned!
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1/10
Really Bad Movie
credencem30 March 2009
This is by far the worst movie I've watched in my 36 years of living. Really it's that bad! I don't see how the previous comment said that by showing it in real 3D or gore, that the movie redeemed itself. It never did. The acting was bad. The suspense was anticipated by the actors, as it is so obvious in a living room scene. If the producer/s of the movie are intending on making a franchise of "My Bloody Valentine", please put it on your living room shelf. I see the movie making career of Jensen Ackles going down the sewers including the rest of the actors. If the kid in the movie wishes to use this in a resume for movie acted in before, please don't. I felt my $10 was badly spent and was eagerly waiting to exit the cinema!
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