Whip It (2009)
Razor: You guys came in second out of two teams.
Razor: Yeah, let's celebrate mediocrity! That's fantastic.
Bliss Cavendar: Screw you and your grandmother's Chevy Celebrity!
Brooke Cavendar: I'm supposed to buy you shoes from a... a head shop? Does that really strike you as responsible parenting?
Bliss Cavendar: Fine, the shoes are a gateway drug.
Bliss Cavendar: [helping Pash to the toilet] Come on, let's get this out.
Pash: [belches low] It's cool. I swallowed it.
Bliss Cavendar: Come on, just stick your fingers down your throat. You'll feel better.
Pash: No! You stick your fingers down YOUR throat.
Bliss Cavendar: ...Pash... you ever thought... about your parents making love... your dad's naked body...
Bliss Cavendar: His balls jiggling... sweaty?
[throws up, heaving]
Pash: [whimpers] That's not fair!
Earl Cavender: I like smart girls. That's why I married your mama. Well, that and I knocked her up.
Pash: [On going to Austin, TX alone] But you don't have the balls.
Bliss Cavendar: I can grow the balls...
Iron Maven: Nice jump, Evel Knievel.
Bliss Cavendar: Thanks. Maybe I'll teach it to you some time.
Iron Maven: [a little surprised] Really?
Bliss Cavendar: Yeah.
Iron Maven: [smiles] Okay.
'Hot Tub' Johnny Rocket: Hey. Black Widows, my spidey senses are tingling. About to make a sequel in my pants
Eva Destruction: Yeah? Spider-Man 3 1/2?
'Hot Tub' Johnny Rocket: Yeah, it is 3 1/2 inches. Wide.
'Hot Tub' Johnny Rocket: Air trombone, yeah.
Bliss Cavendar: Is this what you do with all the girls? Take them here to show off your skills?
Oliver: Yeah, and it usually works too.
Bliss Cavendar: Oh yeah? Maybe we should do something different.
Oliver: Wow, from here it kinda looks like you're wearing a stryper t-shirt.
Bliss Cavendar: stryper? Yeah, 80's christian heavy metal. I mean in the name of jesus we rock.
[Bliss is waiting on a table occupied by Corbi, Colby and their friends]
Colby: What's the name of that thing that if I eat it real fast, it's free?
Bliss Cavendar: That's the Squealer. You have to eat it in three minutes or less.
Colby: [ponders briefly] Yeah. You bring me a Squealer. And I don't mean Corbi.
[Colby laughs and grabs Corbi in a groping hug, and Corbi mock-squeals loudly]
[Bliss finds Iron Maven waiting for her at the Warehouse]
Iron Maven: Ruthless, Ruthless, Ruthless.
Bliss Cavendar: [hesitatingly] Maven, Maven, Maven?
Iron Maven: Hey, guess how old I am.
Bliss Cavendar: [guessing] 27?
Iron Maven: [not at all touched] Oh, that's sweet. I'm 36. Guess when I started skating. I was 31. 'Cause it took me that long to find one thing that I was really good at.
[Iron Maven stands, staring intently at Bliss]
Iron Maven: And you know what? I worked my ass off to get it.
Bliss Cavendar: [nervously] Yeah, me too.
Iron Maven: [smirks briefly] It's too bad you're only 17.
[Bliss stares in shock]
Iron Maven: What do you think the league is gonna say when they find that out? Or your teammates, when they find out you've been lying? That's gonna be rough.
Bliss Cavendar: [pleading desperately] Maven, please, look...
Iron Maven: [cutting her off] No, you look. One day it will be your time, Ruthless, but it's not your time now. And if I was you, I wouldn't even bother lacing up those skates.
[Iron Maven walks away, and Bliss hangs her head and cries]
Bliss Cavendar: Fuck.
Earl Cavender: I can take losing the money. I cannot take loosing the chance for our kid to be happy.
Corbi: So, what are you, like, alternative now?
Bliss Cavendar: Alternative to what?