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Whip It (2009) Poster

(2009)

Quotes

Smashley SimpsonBloody HollyMalice in WonderlandRosa SparksDinah Might: We're number two! We're number two!

Razor: You guys came in second out of two teams.

Smashley SimpsonBloody HollyMalice in WonderlandRosa SparksDinah Might: Whoo!

Razor: Yeah, let's celebrate mediocrity! That's fantastic.

Bliss Cavendar: We deserve better villains.

Bliss Cavendar: Screw you and your grandmother's Chevy Celebrity!

Brooke Cavendar: I'm supposed to buy you shoes from a... a head shop? Does that really strike you as responsible parenting?

Bliss Cavendar: Fine, the shoes are a gateway drug.

Bliss Cavendar: [helping Pash to the toilet] Come on, let's get this out.

Pash: [belches low] It's cool. I swallowed it.

Bliss Cavendar: Come on, just stick your fingers down your throat. You'll feel better.

Pash: No! You stick your fingers down YOUR throat.

Bliss Cavendar: ...Pash... you ever thought... about your parents making love... your dad's naked body...

Pash: ...WHAT?

Bliss Cavendar: His balls jiggling... sweaty?

Pash: nnoo!

[throws up, heaving]

Pash: [whimpers] That's not fair!

Earl Cavender: I like smart girls. That's why I married your mama. Well, that and I knocked her up.

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Pash: [On going to Austin, TX alone] But you don't have the balls.

Bliss Cavendar: I can grow the balls...

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Bliss Cavendar: I'm gonna puke!

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Iron Maven: Nice jump, Evel Knievel.

Bliss Cavendar: Thanks. Maybe I'll teach it to you some time.

Iron Maven: [a little surprised] Really?

Bliss Cavendar: Yeah.

Iron Maven: [smiles] Okay.

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'Hot Tub' Johnny Rocket: Hey. Black Widows, my spidey senses are tingling. About to make a sequel in my pants

Eva Destruction: Yeah? Spider-Man 3 1/2?

'Hot Tub' Johnny Rocket: Yeah, it is 3 1/2 inches. Wide.

[trombone noises]

'Hot Tub' Johnny Rocket: Air trombone, yeah.

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Bliss Cavendar: Is this what you do with all the girls? Take them here to show off your skills?

Oliver: Yeah, and it usually works too.

Bliss Cavendar: Oh yeah? Maybe we should do something different.

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Oliver: Wow, from here it kinda looks like you're wearing a stryper t-shirt.

Bliss Cavendar: stryper? Yeah, 80's christian heavy metal. I mean in the name of jesus we rock.

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Ronny: You can't do that!

Pash: She just di-iid!

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[Bliss is waiting on a table occupied by Corbi, Colby and their friends]

Colby: What's the name of that thing that if I eat it real fast, it's free?

Bliss Cavendar: That's the Squealer. You have to eat it in three minutes or less.

Colby: [ponders briefly] Yeah. You bring me a Squealer. And I don't mean Corbi.

[Colby laughs and grabs Corbi in a groping hug, and Corbi mock-squeals loudly]

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[Bliss finds Iron Maven waiting for her at the Warehouse]

Iron Maven: Ruthless, Ruthless, Ruthless.

Bliss Cavendar: [hesitatingly] Maven, Maven, Maven?

Iron Maven: Hey, guess how old I am.

Bliss Cavendar: [guessing] 27?

Iron Maven: [not at all touched] Oh, that's sweet. I'm 36. Guess when I started skating. I was 31. 'Cause it took me that long to find one thing that I was really good at.

[Iron Maven stands, staring intently at Bliss]

Iron Maven: And you know what? I worked my ass off to get it.

Bliss Cavendar: [nervously] Yeah, me too.

Iron Maven: [smirks briefly] It's too bad you're only 17.

[Bliss stares in shock]

Iron Maven: What do you think the league is gonna say when they find that out? Or your teammates, when they find out you've been lying? That's gonna be rough.

Bliss Cavendar: [pleading desperately] Maven, please, look...

Iron Maven: [cutting her off] No, you look. One day it will be your time, Ruthless, but it's not your time now. And if I was you, I wouldn't even bother lacing up those skates.

[Iron Maven walks away, and Bliss hangs her head and cries]

Bliss Cavendar: Fuck.

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Earl Cavender: I can take losing the money. I cannot take loosing the chance for our kid to be happy.

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Corbi: So, what are you, like, alternative now?

Bliss Cavendar: Alternative to what?

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Maggie Mayhem: Ma'am, put down the lip gloss and step away from the mirror.

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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