- King Julien: Maurice! Mort!
- Maurice: Is there something wrong, your majesty?
- King Julien: Yes! Why didn't you tell me it was my birthday?
- Maurice: Yeah, it's not your birthday.
- King Julien: Of course it is. Otherwise why would you get me this ginormous present?
- Maurice: We didn't give you a present.
- Mort: I did.
- Maurice: No, you didn't!
- Mort: No, I did!... I didn't.
- Kowalski: When did you get a robot?
- King Julien: Oh, do not be pretending, because I know it was you that sent this machine to mock me. Quit it!
- Skipper: Well, Ringtail, we are working on a mocking you scenario.
- Kowalski: Operation: Mock Julien.
- Skipper: But it's still in the lab. It's still at Mach 2. We like to get to Mach 8 before implementation.
- King Julien: You want me to play hide and seek with Lemmy?
- Mort: Uh-huh. Is good idea. You like?
- King Julien: I like. I can show you my seeking technique and also my counting technique. I invented a few new numbers I think you will like.
- [Covers eyes]
- King Julien: One, twolien, three-four-five-six-seven-eight-nine-ten, meleven...
- Kowalski: Fortunes are mere superstitions.
- King Julien: Yes, these stitions are super, and that is why you must listen to them! This is a curse. Your friend has been given a misfortune cookie!
- Private: A what?
- King Julien: A misfortune cookie. It is like a regular fortune cookie, except it is filled with hate, and bile!... and sugar... and evil!
- Private: Oh! That doesn't sound good. Except for the sugar part.
- King Julien: You need the sugar, or the bile will overwhelm the flavor.
- Skipper: Kowalski, report.
- Kowalski: The robot...
- Rico: Boom.
- King Julien: Aaaagh! What - what has been done by you to my poor Lemmy?
- Kowalski: Well, we... It was an accident.
- Private: We didn't mean to blow him up.
- Rico: Kablamo!
- King Julien: He was the only robot I was ever loving.
- Skipper: We're sorry, Ringtail. We just knew what was best.
- Rico: Kablamo!
- King Julien: Kablowing him up was the best?
- Rico: Kablamo!
- Skipper: Okay, we said we knew what was best. We just didn't do what was best.
- [Julien leaves, crestfallen]
- Rico: [Sadly] Kablamo.
- Private: Skipper, I feel bad about this.
- Skipper: Same here, young Private.
- Kowalski: It's as if there's a deep, dark abyss in the center of your soul, and all that is light and good in the world is slipping into it.
- Rico: Yup.
- Kowalski: This must be what it feels like when you've done the wrong thing.
- Private: We've never done the wrong thing before. I don't like it.
- Skipper: This is madness. Utter madness! That robot has to be decisive, forceful, able to take down an armed space squid from 50 yards.
- Private: Right.
- Skipper: You can't boogie your way out of a Martian invasion. Those space squids play for keeps.
- Private: But what can we do about it?
- Skipper: We need to extract that robot away from Julien's sick schooling, and teach him the penguin way.
- Kowalski: Yes! We are getting a robot!
- Skipper: Affirmative.
- Private: But how do we get the robot away from Julien?
- Mort: [Steps out of the shadows, speaks in onminous tone] Leave that to me.
- Skipper: Um... okay.
- Mort: [Cheerful] Really?
- Maurice: Your majesty, this isn't healthy. You need to shake this off.
- King Julien: What's the use? I shall never be shaking this or even my booty ever again.
- Mort: Foot hugging time! Yay!
- [Hugs Julien's feet]
- Maurice: Look at Mort hugging your feet! Doesn't that make you crazy? Doesn't that make you want to do something? Anything?
- King Julien: It's not the same without my Lemmy.
- Skipper: Rico, get a hold of yourself. Fortunes don't mean anything.
- Private: But Skipper, yours did.
- Skipper: That's called the exception that proves the rule.
- Private: And mine.
- Skipper: The other exception that...
- Private: And Kowalski's
- Skipper: All right, they were exceptional cookies! That still doesn't mean anything.
- King Julien: How dare you accusing me of such outrageousness, like a snake!
- Maurice: Yo, we got a snake to bit Rico! This'll convince those pen...
- [Sees Skipper]
- Maurice: Oh, well, forget it.
- Marlene: You want your fortune read, Rico?
- [Rico spits out his fortune and gives it to Mason; Phil reads it and signs something]
- Mason: Egad, are you sure you're reading that correctly?
- Marlene: What's it say?
- Mason: Uh... your smiles are like rays of sunshine, warm and inviting. My, look at the time, we must dash.
- Skipper: Hold on, chimp! I smell monkey business.
- Mason: You do?
- Skipper: Yeah, I do. Rico, smile.
- [Rico smiles]
- Skipper: That is not a warm and inviting smile.
- Kowalski: More like creepy and unsettling.
- King Julien: Maurice, I worry about those penguins. What could make them believe in curses?
- Maurice: Short of that penguin meeting a foul end, nothing.
- King Julien: Aha, but what if we made Freako...
- Maurice: Rico.
- King Julien: ...Rico meet a foul end? That would make them believe.
- Maurice: Probably, but it wouldn't be a curse.
- King Julien: Wouldn't it, Maurice? Are you sure?
- Maurice: Yeah, I'm pretty sure.
- King Julien: And I'm pretty not. No, no, wait! I'm pretty. Very, very pretty. So pretty! Mort, tell me I am pretty.
- Mort: You are pretty.
- King Julien: Thank you. See, Maurice? Mort agrees with me. Case closed.
- Maurice: All right. What did you have in mind?
- King Julien: Come closer! Closer! A little more closer! Wait, okay, that's too close. Take a step back, a little half step. Right there.
- Mason: I say, would you like Phil and I to read your fortune?
- Skipper: Knock yourself out.
- Mason: [Interpreting for Phil as he signs what the fortune says] Your decisive skills make you a natural born leader.
- Skipper: That's nice, but what does the cookie say?
- Mason: That is what it says.
- Skipper: Oh. That is one perceptive cookie.
- King Julien: I will teach you everything about being a lemur king: the bossing, the bragging, but most of all, the boogieing!
- King Julien: You still have many important things to learn, such as... the Mambo! The Moonwalk! The Egyptian! The Electric Noodle! The Robot! No, more jerky, you know, like a robot. I would think that would be easy for you.