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Sharp Teeth (2006)

Video  -  Comedy | Horror  -  2006 (USA)
2.0
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Ratings: 2.0/10 from 51 users  
Reviews: 5 user | 1 critic

A nuclear leak mutates the fish in the lake next to the local university. Journalism student, Lola Dent sees this story as an opportunity to make the honor list. She uses her wiles to ... See full summary »

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Cast

Credited cast:
Kerry Corrigan ...
Natty Paste
...
Earl Molar
Strath Crawford ...
Sgt. Huey Scrime
Erin Dunnigan ...
Canoe Victim
Ethan Edwards ...
Bernard Tusk
Ilene Elkaim ...
Lola Dent
Peter Foulds ...
Rod Chopper
Bill Fulker ...
Professor Pierre Pierre
Andrew Huisman ...
Andy Kline
Bev Mattson ...
Dean Kitty Devine
Thomas W. Mays ...
Newspaper Editor / Canoe Victim
Vera Raiser ...
Queen Vera
George Sanford ...
Jake Offal
Melanie Staley ...
Greta Vinka
Tom Tranmer ...
Victim
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Storyline

A nuclear leak mutates the fish in the lake next to the local university. Journalism student, Lola Dent sees this story as an opportunity to make the honor list. She uses her wiles to convince a rookie harbor police officer to help her crack the case. Written by Echelon Studios

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Terror lies just below the surface ...

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Comedy | Horror

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2006 (USA)  »

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Followed by Marina Monster (2008) See more »

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User Reviews

 
Save the Carp, Kill the Crew!
1 November 2011 | by (the Draconian Swamp of Unholy Souls) – See all my reviews

I guess this thought crossed the mind of many B-horror movie lovers already… After seeing yet another cheap and horribly lame horror movie, it's all too tempting to think something like "I can do this better…". That's probably what Christine Whitlock must have thought right before making this "Sharp Teeth". Unfortunately, for her at least, it's really not that easy to make a half-decent amateur film and now her own work is the subject of mockery. "Sharp Teeth" is a completely unendurable and ridiculous piece of garbage. Whitlock clearly recruited all of her family members and friends to appear in her film, but none of them has got even the slightest bit of acting capacities. The good woman also didn't work with a script or storybook, so it seems, because the plot is completely incoherent and derivative of two dozen other creature- features. It's about an energy research facility which dumps its nuclear waste in a nearby lake. This causes the carp population – that is already threatened with extinction – to mutate into hideously green and bloodthirsty monsters. Yes that's right, this movie is about murderous carps! Lola Dent, a journalism student even though she's at least ten years too old to pass for a student, goes on a private investigation, but she and boy-toy deputy sheriff are too fixated on her cleavage in order to make any progress in the case. The whole film is stuffed with tiny little details that are just downright irritating, like for instance a corpulent nurse who continuously squeezes her own breasts and then they make this childish trumpet noise. Or a whole bunch of female environmental demonstrators whose idea of running amok is walking around in a circle and shouting out "Save the Carp! Save the Carp!". Even though dozens of people "mysteriously" vanished already in and around the lake, quite often with surviving witnesses around, there are constantly new imbeciles going for a swim or a boat ride. And, of course, in good old "Jaws" tradition, the local authorities refuse to believe something is the matter. Oh blah blah, we wasted too many words already on this retarded amateur romp. In case you even slightly consider of watching "Sharp Teeth", well … don't!


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