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ThanksKilling (2009) Poster

(2009)

Quotes

Darren: Looks like I got something you don't, Turkey!

The Killer Turkey: What's that Darren... a vagina?

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The Killer Turkey: [while having sex with Ali] Damn, that was good! You just got stuffed!

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The Killer Turkey: Nice tits, bitch!

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Johnny: One extra small gravy-flavored condom?

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Darren: Turkeyologists all over the world know it as... Thankskilling!

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The Killer Turkey: Gobble, Gobble, Motherfucker!

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The Killer Turkey: Shut the fuck up, you stupid bitch!

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Kristen: [right after a girl has lifted her shirt and shown her bra] Pull yor shirt down, honey! It's Thanksgiving, not Titsgiving!

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Kristen: Her legs are harder to close than the JonBenet Ramsey case.

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Darren: I'm gonna have sex with someone in this car. Yeah, for once, you know

[looking at his hand]

Darren: , it's not just gonna be by myself.

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Billy: Let me guess, it's 505 years later, right?

Darren: No... but it will be in 45 minutes!

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Ali: Come on! I mean, it's totally impossible for a turkey to kill a human, right?

Darren: [laughs] Oh... there are ways.

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Darren: It was just a story, Kristen, I doubt it's even true.

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Darren: Not just any beak. A turkey beak.

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Johnny: Mom, you know me and poppa don't talk anymore. Ever since I got put at second-string quarterback he hasn't even wanted to talk to me.

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Kristen: My dad has a huge collection of books. I'm sure he has something on killer turkeys.

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Billy: I hate books! Why can't it just tell us what to do?

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The Killer Turkey: It almost did, but it didn't.

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Johnny: He's dead... unless he fell in some radioactive waste. But what are the odds of that happening?

Kristen: Don't be silly, that only happens in movies.

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Johnny: You know, in a way, I'm glad this happened. I may have lost my parents, but I gained a girlfriend.

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Johnny: [as he lay dying] I wish I could call a time out...

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Sheriff Roud: Oh, by the way, your stepmomma left me. Love you, bye!

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Kristen: I guess I was just a little beaked out - uhh, I mean freaked out.

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Billy: We gotta find a way to kill that cockblocking turkey!

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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