K.I.T.T.: Why did you leave Sarah Graiman?
Mike Traceur: Oh, we are not talking about this.
K.I.T.T.: Sarah said you were immature and selfish, and that is why you left her.
Mike Traceur: She said that?
K.I.T.T.: Do you have another girlfriend? Are you a homosexual?
Mike Traceur: Oh, come on. Did you really just ask me that?
K.I.T.T.: Is it not natural that you should have a companion or some sort?
Mike Traceur: Monogamy is not natural.
K.I.T.T.: Why do you say that?
Mike Traceur: Because relationships don't last.
K.I.T.T.: It is true in the last 20 years 53% of the marriages in the United States ended in divorce.
Mike Traceur: You happy?
K.I.T.T.: I cannot be happy.
Mike Traceur: Yeah, me neither.
K.I.T.T.: I am the Knight Industries Three Thousand. You may call me "K.I.T.T."
K.I.T.T.: I am incapable of happiness. But I will say that it is logical that you are here.
Mike Traceur: Yeah, I know what you mean.
Mike Traceur: K.I.T.T., you try something like that again, I'll put sugar in your gas tank.
K.I.T.T.: Don't even think about it, Mike.
K.I.T.T.: I require fuel.
Mike Traceur: You run on gas. Not hydrogen or plutonium or something really cool I've never heard of?
Sarah: Yeah. And what if you're in Nebraska and your hydrogen fuel system breaks down? Complicated isn't always better.
Mike Traceur: Why you gotta hate on Nebraska?
K.I.T.T.: My system is largely solar powered and recycles 91% of its expended energy, allowing a ratio of 167 miles traveled for every gallon of fuel burned.
Mike Traceur: So the super car runs on gas.
Mike Traceur: Well, together again.
K.I.T.T.: I am incapable of happiness, but I will say it seems logical that you are here.
Mike Traceur: Yeah, I know what you mean. Mind if I drive?
K.I.T.T.: Is this going to become a habit?
Mike Traceur: Definitely.
Mike Traceur: He was my friend.
K.I.T.T.: I am still learning about the complexities of friendship, but I would be honored to count you as mine.
Mike Traceur: Every cowboy needs a sidekick.
K.I.T.T.: I would not sell yourself short Michael. You are much more than a horse
Mike Traceur: Hey, sense of humor. That's new.
K.I.T.T.: You would not be pleased if I dropped food on you.
Sarah: [Mike is being rude to K.I.T.T] Do unto others.
K.I.T.T.: [pulls up the verse she is referring to on the computer] From the book of Matthew - Chapter 7; Verse 12.
Mike Traceur: This is intolerable.
Mike Traceur: [KITT does a 180, tossing everyone around in the car] Sorry, I'll pick up the chip!