6.1/10
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40 user 32 critic

The Maiden Heist (2009)

PG-13 | | Comedy, Crime | 8 July 2010 (Portugal)
A comedy centered on three museum security guards who devise a plan to steal back the artworks to which they have become attached after they are transferred to another museum.

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Cast

Cast overview, first billed only:
...
...
Lead Villain
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Docent
Patricia B. Till ...
Rude Museum Patron
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Rose Barlow
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Donnie (as Bhavesh R. Patel)
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Curator
Philip Dorn Hebert ...
Needlebaum
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Jim Chiros ...
Sculptor
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Starving Artist
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Bob
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Warehouse Foreman
Anthony Cascio ...
Tony (as Anthony M. Cascio)
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Storyline

Three middle-age guards learn that their museum has sold a wing of art to a Danish museum. Each has a favorite in that collection, and none can imagine life without the peace and completion it brings. Though mere acquaintances, they plot a theft of the three pieces between the time they are packed and the time they're loaded onto a plane. First each must obtain a forgery; then, they have to smuggle the forgeries into the museum and find a way to make the switches. The heist is complicated by Roger's intrusive wife - he's promised her a trip to Florida for their anniversary - and George's proclivity for taking his clothes off when standing in front of the warrior statue he loves. Written by <jhailey@hotmail.com>

Plot Summary | Add Synopsis

Taglines:

They're not bad guys. Just bad thieves.

Genres:

Comedy | Crime

Motion Picture Rating (MPAA)

Rated PG-13 for some strong language, nudity and brief fantasy violence | See all certifications »

Parents Guide:

 »
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Details

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Release Date:

8 July 2010 (Portugal)  »

Also Known As:

The Lonely Maiden  »

Box Office

Budget:

$20,000,000 (estimated)
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Company Credits

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Technical Specs

Runtime:

Sound Mix:

|

Color:

Aspect Ratio:

2.35 : 1
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Did You Know?

Trivia

The ladies playing the museum visitors were not told that Christopher Walken was going to interrupt the docent's explanation of "The Lonely Maiden". Therefore, their reactions to Roger's expertise were genuine. See more »

Goofs

At the end of the movie they are supposed to be on Miami Beach, but the background clearly shows hills and geography that is not Florida. See more »

Quotes

[first lines]
Lead Villain: I sincerely apologize for disturbing your afternoon. If you relax, and stay calm, you will all be here alive. We have come only for the girl.
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Connections

Features Wheel of Fortune (1983) See more »

Soundtracks

The Halls of Montezuma
(aka "The Marines Hymn")
Music by Jacques Offenbach (uncredited)
Written by M.L. Lake (as Mayhew Lake)
Courtesy of APM Music LLC
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User Reviews

Like Freeman's THE CODE, a mix of the decent and not-so-decent
25 November 2009 | by (Victoria, BC) – See all my reviews

What's up with Morgan Freeman appearing in heist movies that go direct to video? Just a few months ago we got THE CODE, and now we have THE MAIDEN HEIST. Actually, it does appear that THE MAIDEN HEIST was originally going to have a theatrical release, but the bankruptcy of the Yari Film Group put an end to those plans and no other distributor seemed interested in releasing it to theaters.

Based on that fact, you might think that this is a bad movie, but it's not. There are some positive things about it. The production values are pretty strong for what was reportedly a somewhat limited budget; nothing about the movie looks cheap. The planning of the heist and the execution of the heist have some believable complications, and what's done about them are believable as well. Some humorous touches are amusing. Freeman, Walken, and Macy play a likable bunch of fellows that you hope will succeed.

But there's also some not-so-decent things about the movie. The violent opening fantasy sequence seems way out of place with its harsh tone. Except for Walken's character, we don't learn too much about the characters in the movie. There are some unexplained things in the movie, like where the thieves got the van and how Walken's character adjusted the vacation he was going to take with his wife. The main problem, however, is that while the movie is refreshingly low key, it's TOO low key. It's lacking a bit more edge to it. Some more excitement or some more laughs would have helped a lot.

Maybe it's best that this didn't land in theaters; I wouldn't have recommended to pay full price to see it in a theater. But if you like caper movies, like any or all of the three lead actors, and you can see it for little or no cost, it's an acceptable time waster.


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