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(TV Series)

(2008)

Quotes

[first lines]

Duggie Hammond: What are you doing here?

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Kate Hammond: Well, if you really must know, around that time I was having a bit of a serious snog.

DS Ben Jones: Can I have the gentleman's name?

Kate Hammond: The gentleman's name was Caroline.

DS Ben Jones: Caroline!

[she just looks at him]

DS Ben Jones: Oh.

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Johnny Hammond: Let's face it. What do you get for burglary these days? A holiday in Wales with a social worker?

Dr Bullard: Tenerife if it's serious.

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DS Ben Jones: You don't have to look quite so smug, sir.

DCI Tom Barnaby: Of course I *do*. It's one of the perks of experience.

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[last lines]

Joyce Barnaby: How did you get His Honour to do this for free?

DCI Tom Barnaby: His Honour is doing this out of the kindness of his heart.

Joyce Barnaby: That is nice.

DCI Tom Barnaby: Well, I thought so.

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Biddy Dixon: How's it goin', Lionel?

Lionel Hicks: Fine, Biddy. Put the kettle on.

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DCI Tom Barnaby: Feuding's an Olympic sport around here.

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Colonel Henry Hammond: Sophie, hang it. Is she a, is she a communist?

Arabella Hammond: No, Henry, she's a social worker.

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Johnny Hammond: [about his father] I was his worst nightmare and he mine.

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Dr Bullard: [Sarcastically] Very difficult to operate a wheelchair when someone's shot half your head off.

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Arabella Hammond: Love, hate, what's the difference, Mr. Barnaby? What's the difference?

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Arabella Hammond: Thank God for small Thorazines!

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Arabella Hammond: Most first marriages are a mistake.

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DCI Tom Barnaby: It seems that lack of respect for the mayor is endemic in our wayward community.

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Arabella Hammond: May as well be hung for two lambs as a sheep.

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Arabella Hammond: David, I picked you for my occasional indulgence because it appealed to a certain perversity within me. When having sex with you, I like to imagine how deeply horrified the Hammond clan would be. But, believe me, otherwise it was pure farmyard, nothing else at all.

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WPC Gail Stephens: [about Barnaby] Is he on to something?

DS Ben Jones: I'm never quite sure.

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DS Ben Jones: So what's in there?

[reaches for box lid]

DCI Tom Barnaby: Hey-ey-ey.

[stops Jones opening it]

DCI Tom Barnaby: Do you know what a MacGuffin is?

DS Ben Jones: No.

DCI Tom Barnaby: Well, it's one of them.

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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