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Quotes

[the family runs into the house and find Plopper the Pig sitting on the couch. The family sits down and Homer happily cradles him]

Homer Simpson: My summer love.

Plopper: Oink.

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Homer Simpson: [after picking Mr. Burns out of a water fountain] Hey... you're not a penny!

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Mr. Burns: You saved my life. There must be something I can do for you.

Homer's Brain: A cookie! No, a car! No, a cookie!

Mr. Burns: You're getting a free dinner...

Homer Simpson: Gasp!

Mr. Burns: ...with...

Homer Simpson: Yeah?

Mr. Burns: ...me!

Homer Simpson: Me? But that's you!

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Svetlana: My name is Svetlana, but you can call me 'Hey, baby!'.

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Homer Simpson: [after giving the pilot the money] Sempher Fudge.

Pilot: Did you just say Sempher Fudge?

Homer Simpson: No I said the right thing.

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Pilot #1: [after the plane has entered turbulence] I didn't think I would be flying today, so I was doing heroin.

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Waylon Smithers: But what happened to that mini phone I gave you, sir?

Mr. Burns: That was a phone? I thought it was a lemon drop.

[Burns' belly starts to vibrate]

Waylon Smithers: I'll get your last listed number.

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Mr. Burns: Now to enjoy the Miami of Canada: Chicago.

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Marge Simpson: You smell like Chicago. Did you go there in a commercial plane?

Homer Simpson: No way! Commercial planes are for losers and terrorists. I went in a private plane.

Marge Simpson: Was there any difference?

Homer Simpson: Are you kidding? It's the difference between champagne and carbonated pee.

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Homer Simpson: I don't need a shrink, therapist, consultant or motivational speaker.

Colby Krause: I'm a life coach.

Homer Simpson: Ooh, tell me more.

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Marge Simpson: What are you doing? You don't know how to fly a plane!

Homer Simpson: I once drove a car off a cliff. How hard can it be? Hmm, what's the ocean doing up in the sky?

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Duff Man: Duff Man, has reported you, to the FAA! This, near miss, will be investigated by a panel, of three, retired, pilots. Oh yeah!

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Homer Simpson: Oh, what's the point of putting on my socks? I'd just have to take them off again a week later.

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Milhouse van Houten: Principal Skinner, why did we have to leave the Touch and Learn Reptile House so early?

Principal Seymour Skinner: Well, it seems someone was riding the giant tortoise naked.

Otto: It's not my fault. The drinking fountain dared me to do it.

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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