Ted: Alright, I'm ready. Let's hit it.
Marshall: Can't go. Tournament.
Ted: What so you mean? I suited up!
Barney: You take too long to get ready.
Ted: What are you talking about? I got that low maintenance, just rolled out of bed look.
Marshall: Yeah, which takes an hour and a half of waxing, tugging and teasing to achieve.
Barney: And then he starts on his hair. Ace!
Marshall Eriksen: Why wasn't I told for the belt? I can go for the belt!
[Barney, Lily and Ted laugh]
Marshall Eriksen: If Lily woulda' die before me, then I could ride tricycle!
Lily Aldrin: If I die, I would just come back and haunt your penis...
Robin Scherbatsky: I'm not shaving my legs for the first three dates. If I don't shave, I don't misbehave.
Barney Stinson: FYI, men don't care. They just want to get to the green, they don't mind going through the rough.
Robin Scherbatsky: I need a razor.
Lily Aldrin: What happened to not shaving until the third date? Where are your convictions?
Robin Scherbatsky: They were surgically removed by Doctor Awesome.
Ted Mosby: [after two girls are both hitting on him] I'm never NOT wearing a suit again.
Barney Stinson: The real Wimbledon lasts a fortnight.
Marshall Eriksen: British words are cool. Also, their lawyers wear wigs. I wore a wig at work once and they laughed at me.
Ted Mosby: It's a tricycle.
Barney Stinson: No way!
Marshall Eriksen: What happened?
Barney Stinson: It's a tricycle.
Marshall Eriksen: No way!
Lily Aldrin: What happened?
Marshall Eriksen: It's a tricycle.
Lily Aldrin: I'm telling you now, all sorority girls are sluts.