Max Russo: [after the tiny trophy man crawls up his sleeve and emerges from his pants leg, carrying a pair of white underpants] Hey, my underwear! Hey, you know what, I was wearing those for ten straight days!
Theresa Russo: He-e-y, how was school? Max, why are you carrying Alex's backpack like that?
Max Russo: She told me my backpack was bending my spine, so she gave me hers to even it out.
Alex Russo: Let's check.
[takes her backpack]
Alex Russo: There, all straight. You're welcome.
Jerry Russo: Alex, your brother is not your pack mule.
Max Russo: Yeah, I'm not your pack mule.
Alex Russo: I'm sorry, Maxie.
[hands him her backpack]
Alex Russo: Could you take this upstairs for me?
Max Russo: Sure.
Justin Russo: In walks this brand new girl, and she is the hottest thing I've ever seen in my life.
Jerry Russo: Eva Longoria goes to your school?
Theresa Russo: [offended] Eva Longoria?
Alex Russo: Miranda Hampson? Isn't she that new goth girl in eleventh grade?
Justin Russo: She's not goth. She just likes wearing black and dark makeup and listens to bands that are kind of scary.
Alex Russo: Oh, so not goth. But goth.
Theresa Russo: So, how long have you been in this line of work?
Trophy Man: Well, since the first Olympics, but I was just on a medal back then. I've done all kinds of trophies.
Alex Russo: What about tennis?
[Trophy Man poses as tennis player]
Justin Russo: World's fastest typist?
[Trophy Man poses as typist]
Trophy Man: Yeah. Oh, you know what other trophy I've done?
[leans toward Theresa]
Trophy Man: World's greatest kisser.
Jerry Russo: All right, all right, it's past everybody's bedtime. It's time for you to get back on the pedestal. Alex.
Alex Russo: Garybay eemobilitay.