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35 out of 58 people found the following review useful:

Simple Review

3/10
Author: bwanaart from United States
26 May 2008

This movie was a classic "B" - - SciFi type of movie. It has a wonderful cast of really good actors...but in my opinion the plot was anemic, the directing was even more-so...and I loved it! Why? Because the cast each did an excellent job of acting and the setting was believable. One can see from the 'heft' of big stars where the budget most certainly was spent. It most certainly wasn't spent on special effects or, for that matter, screen writing.

All in all, I would not only recommend it because of its positive aspects...but would watch it again and again if the opportunity affords itself. The positives outweigh the negatives.

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11 out of 14 people found the following review useful:

I wasted 3 hours of my life tonight

1/10
Author: capechick2730 from United States
25 May 2008

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

I knew this was going to be a bomb when the first shark attack reminded me of a video game from a few generations back it was so completely phony. Granted it was made for TV so it couldn't be as realistic as "Jaws", but my goodness this is now on my top 10 for worst movies I have ever seen.

The basic premise, as usual, is the bad guy, Armand Assante wants to build a multi-million dollar condominium complex in this little town on the California coast. Most of the residents are all for the idea because the "fishing has dried up" and the economy is in the toilet. Only Daniel and his family are holding out.

Apparently The Bad Guy has deliberately contaminated the water to destroy the fishing in the hopes that everybody in the town will wish to sell to him (ho-hum). Unfortunately there seems to be a nasty side effect of this poisonous water: The sharks get bigger, meaner and start bonding together! OMG! Can you guess how The Bad Guy dies at the end?? The scenes were so disjointed; one minute it's sunrise but in the next scene it's still dinnertime. These people all knew about the shark attacks; well maybe most don't because nobody I saw eaten was ever reported missing including a daycare worker and yet THEY STILL GO IN THE WATER! We have people swimming, scuba diving, surfboarding, having a water Baptism, you name it, they were doing it the water. And while it appeared to be cold enough that some were wearing sweaters and wetsuits & you could see their breath, people right up the beach were in bathing suits and splashing in the surf. People are being eaten and murdered and some of the characters start making out after a near death experience.

Have you figured out yet that this is a stinker of a movie? Who makes these things? Worse yet, who approves these movies? A Junior High kid who has played Donkey Kong a few too many times? If you're desperate to see people eaten by sharks go watch Jaws (the original) and don't waste 3 hours of your precious life on this drivel. The actors and actresses should not have even got paid for this movie, they should be sending US checks for watching it.

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12 out of 16 people found the following review useful:

A Complete Abomination

1/10
Author: Chris Hardaman from United States
28 May 2008

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

Beware -- this movie is terrible.

***minor spoilers to follow***

First off is the horribly cliché'd plot of an evil, greedy businessman trying to develop beautiful natural coastal town for profit. Come on, that is lame! It's done to death! Also there is a high amount of shark attacks in this movie and none are actually seen on film, which is fine because it was a Hallmark movie so I get that. What isn't fine is that the writers substituted quantity over quality. They failed to develop any of the characters who died. Not only that, but nobody seemed to notice or care that people were going missing at an alarming rate. This is a small town where pretty much everyone knows everyone. There wouldn't be an hour gone by before the entire town would be on alert. How could the filmmakers miss this elementary fact?

I think this film had a promising cast, but pretty much everyone really laid an egg here. Maybe it was the poor writing or perhaps the poor direction, but most likely it was a combination of bad writing and bad direction. The script was a failure and whoever was responsible for authorizing this script into production should be fired. The director is much more talented than he showed us on Shark Swarm. I just don't know what went wrong, but this film failed on every level. (1/10)

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6 out of 8 people found the following review useful:

Onw of the worst films I ever watched

1/10
Author: lvelho-1 from Portugal
9 May 2009

The movie has Terrible script. It show us terrible performances and awful lines. Just couldn't waist my time to see it until the end. Very very bad. Several scenes in the movie are plainly useless. Don't have connection with the story, and don't add any value. Why are they there ? Bad editing ? Some lines are just ridiculous and one could not believe people talk like that to each other in real life. Some things happen that result from very dumb decisions from the characters. For instance: There are these 3 boats side by side in the middle of the sea (actually one can tell it is shot in an harbour so calm the water is) the bigger boat has the engine broken and main characters want to get away from a bad guy and sharks. Instead of choosing the middle fiber boat they decide to get away using the smaller rubber boat...plainly dumb.

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4 out of 5 people found the following review useful:

Good because of Armand Assante

10/10
Author: Tonci Pivac from New Zealand
21 April 2011

I really enjoyed this one for starters,, John Schneider did a wonderful job with the material that he was given,, i was disappointed in Daryl Hannah though,, i thought that Armand Assante did a great job as the bad guy in the movie, F. Murray Abraham didn't have enough screen time in this.. the plot was great i thought,, here you have a real estate developer trying to basically buy up the whole entire fishing community, although be it very unscroupulus in his ways, dumping illegal toxins into the bay, therefore making all the fish die off , so the community goes basically bankrupt, but in the process the chemicals do something to the sharks and mess up their brain waves, turning them basically from docile,, to manhunters,, and they eventually start to swarm on the community of Full Moon Bay,, i think this was a great TV movie, and i know many of you won't agree with me,, but i just don't care.

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4 out of 6 people found the following review useful:

Whole Lotta Munchin' Going On

7/10
Author: zardoz-13 from United States
8 January 2010

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

People who love to watch movies about fictional shark attacks will get more bite for their bucks with veteran television director James A. Contner's "Shark Swarm," literally a shark munching marathon that clocks in at a whopping 169 minutes. Okay, the sharks--great whites,hammerheads, and scores of others--are primarily CGI creations. You will lose count of the number of times that one shark gobbles the camera, but Contner manages to generate a fair amount of suspense. Every time that anybody plunges into the briny deep, you know that they will wind up as shark bait. Of course, everything here is entirely preposterous, but you know that the seaweed huggers will love the ecology message. The teleplay by Matthew Chernov and David Rosiak takes its time with the formulaic plot that has "Jaws" written all over it with some melodramatic variations. Indeed, if "Jaws" did not discourage you would splashing around in the deep blue sea, "Shark Swarm" ought to with its fishy action.

Fisherman Daniel Wilder (John Schneider of "The Dukes of Hazzard" & "Smallville)and his wife Brook (Darryl Hannah of "Splash") along with their brother Professor Phillip Wilder (Roark Critchlow of "Komodo vs. Cobra")are the only people who refuse to sell out to a greedy real estate developer Hamilton Lux (Armand Assante of "I, Jury")who wants to turn the waterfront into a luxury condo. Lux has brought out everybody else in town and struggles to buy out Wilder, but he cannot make our hero an offer that he can refuse. Meanwhile, Lux's have a power plant and his scheming underling Kane Markus (John Enos III of "Demolition Man ") has been secretly dumping toxic waste into the coastal waters to drive off the fish and deprive the fishermen of their livelihoood.

Meanwhile, Philip strikes up a relationship with an EPA employee, Amy Zuckerman (Heather McComb of "Apt Pupil"), who initially starts out working with Lux until Philip woos her from the dark side. Eventually, she discovers foul play and Lux manages to wield his influence and has her removed from the job. When Philip is not making time with Amy, he is getting even more acquainted with popular college professor Professor Bill Girdler (F. Murray Abraham of "Scarface")who uses a NASA satellite to study the California coastal waters. Lately, he has been noticing schools of sharks swimming together and regards this behavior as anomalous. Before long even Daniel is suspicious. It seems that the phosphorous that Lux's henchmen have been secretly dumping has really screwed up the sharks. These predators attack anybody in the water! "Shark Swarm" is aptly titled because Contner shows up many scenes of swarming sharks that gang up on humans. In the last hour, things turn pretty melodramatic when Markus moves against Wilder and company and tries to drown them in a shark cage. Meantime, Philip has acquired secret pulse guns from another professor and discovers that when discharged at the schools of sharks that they scatter. Several other subplots crop up, including one about a little girl who refuses to wade into the water after she witnesses two shark attacks. Her distraught parents strive to make her look stupid, but she stands by her guns and gets to tell them after a narrow escape from shark infested waters that she "told them so." Professor Girdler picks up the sharks on his satellite imagery because they are glowing with the phosphorous and he warns our heroes that three beaches are liable to turn into massacres. At one point, Markus tries to kill Daniel and Brook, but Brook outsmarts him. This is the most anemic scene in this made-of-the Sci-Fi Channel movie. Daniel and Brook are suspending in a shark cage that the predators will gnaw through in no time. Miraculously, largely owing to circumstance and the fact that they are hero and heroine, they survive.

Amand Assante makes a slimy villain as does John Enos III. They get their comeuppance just as you would expect. Chomp! "Shark Swarm" is fairly predictable with few surprises, but the familiar cast and their sterling performances help out and the story does manage to hold your attention despite its excessive running time.

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1 out of 1 people found the following review useful:

Jaws 5?

Author: Master Cultist (smellthecult.com@hotmail.co.uk) from United Kingdom
8 January 2010

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

Some movies truly reveal the mentality of the gibbering teats that infest IMDb for the most part, giving straight to TV fodder such lowly ratings and savage reviews. You know the type, those that take life way too seriously, and judge every movie as if the people making it genuinely believe they are creating a masterpiece. These imbeciles seem to have no inkling that, sometimes, movies are made just because the people behind it think it will be a good laugh to do so. They snort cocaine, smoke White Widow, laugh their anuses off in the concept meetings and churn out something that they know for a fact is a piece of brown, but my Christly Christington they had a whale of a time making it.

So here's Shark Swarm, a movie that is to Jaws what Dan Brown is to Clive Cussler: a pale imitation. And very enjoyable it is too.

The plot: A shady 'A-Team' style real estate developer is dumping chemicals into a bay that, unbeknownst to him, has the side effect of turning the resident shark population into blood thirsty, pack hunting monsters. No-one is safe; bathers, fishermen, surfers.

Well, unless they just stayed out of the water.

You know, maybe just stood on the shore and looked out to sea, admiring nature in all its beauty from the safety of solid ground.

Then they'd be safe.

I don't know, maybe they could head to Starbucks, grab a take-out skinny mochachino with extra choco flakes and sit on the beach reading a good book, chatting to their friends, maybe even listening to some music on their MP3 players.

Then they'd be safe.

Just don't go in the water people. Don't go anywhere freakin' near it. It's full of things that want to kill us, at all times, not just when sharks mutate but, every second of every God given day there's things in there with big teeth and poisoned prongs and body parts I can't even identify that cut and slash and gnaw. Poisonous, deadly demons with the capacity to exist underwater that hate us, absolutely hate us, and take any opportunity they get to pierce us or slash us or eat us with their huge, tooth-filled mouths.

Just stay away from the water, folks, if it's the last thing you do. The things in there HATE US.

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Trash but it rises to the top of the can

5/10
Author: Zoooma from Oakland, New Jersey
28 September 2014

Surprisingly not terrible. This made-for-TV action-horror-thriller has a good amount of shark kills and blood, especially for the ultra-gooey, super-sappy Hallmark Channel. I didn't know going into this that it was 2 hours and 38 minutes long (apparently shown in two parts over two nights on television.) When I finally glanced at the time on the DVD player, it showed 1:52 and we were nowhere near wrapping it up yet! Okay, if the time passed by that easily it must not be that horrible. John Schneider (Bo Duke) was actually really good. Darryl Hannah meh. Armand Assante was in his element in a stereotypical bad guy role. Lots of blood but little gore but still like 2 to 3 dozen kills. But why was no one concerned all these people were going missing?!?! Not exactly the most well-written script but I have seen much, much worse. Production value is better than I expected. Anything on Syfy Channel would have been pure trash. This actually rises to the top of the trash can.

4.8 / 10 stars

--Zoooma, a Kat Pirate Screener

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How do things like this get approved?

1/10
Author: The_Strangeler from United States
9 February 2013

Much has been made of the poor performances by a menagerie of "washed-up" former stars, but that's missing the woods for the trees.

The problem with this is the story and the writing. There is not an actor on the planet who could have done anything with such awful material. That's a fact.

A movie like Superbad seems like Schindler's List by comparison, and Superbad was written by Seth Rogen when he was 13 years old.

The biggest mystery by far is not how this incredibly poorly written movie got approved and made -- that happens all the time.

No, the big question has to be why did anyone approve *four more films* by these no-talent writers, each of the four at least as bad as Shark Swarm?

As much as I'd love to put this in the "So Bad, It's Good" category, I can't. It's in the "So Bad, It's Just Bad" file.

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Sharks attack a peaceful bay.

4/10
Author: Michael O'Keefe from Muskogee OK
27 December 2010

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

This made-for-cable mini-series can be predictable, but actually interesting. The CGI is at fault of being repetitive although not totally distracting. Nice photography and decent enough story about a small California fishing town being starved out by a greedy industrial millionaire Hamilton Lux(Armand Assante). Peaceful waters have slowly been poisoned by toxic waste in hopes of killing off the local fishing . Lux is wanting to strangle the business of Full Moon Bay in order to turn the area into a high dollar luxury resort complex. With lack of food supply, numerous swarms of Great White sharks enter the bay killing for sustenance and pleasure. Fisherman Daniel Wilder(John Schnider) and his business owner wife Brook(Daryl Hannah)are joined by Dan's brother(Roark Critchlow)and a Marine biologist (Heather McComb)in putting up a last ditch fight with Lux to save the bay. Also in the cast: John Enos III, Gene Davis, Mimi Michaels and F. Murray Abraham.

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