[on the telephone
How are things down at Customs and Excise? VAT lads still gouging eyeballs and eating babies, are they?
No, actually. I want to do *you* a favour. I discovered a whole nest of very naughty people; duty evaders by the thousand. Thought you'd like to set your little Rottweilers onto their nether regions.
Yes, life is fun, isn't it?