The Doctor finds his TARDIS colliding with a spaceship based on the RMS Titanic during a Christmas party. With the help of a waitress named Astrid, the Doctor must take on the race called ...
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The Doctor finds his TARDIS colliding with a spaceship based on the RMS Titanic during a Christmas party. With the help of a waitress named Astrid, the Doctor must take on the race called the Hosts as the lives of the Titanic crew and those on Earth are in danger. Written by
This was my first ever exposure to Doctor Who and...it turned into a LONG HIKE for me to take this show even a little seriously after this.
Doctor Who is now one of my all time favorite shows (if you look on my profile and "Top 10 TV Shows" list, trust me, both Classic and New Who are there) and that owes no favors for this episode.
So the plot technically starts with a short film called Time Crash, the only fond thing about this special, because it has its own IMDb page, sucks for the rest of this special but I'll give you a brief rundown - Doctor runs into past incarnation of Doctor, they bicker as usual, both actors look like they're having fun, they move on. While they got the characterization for Peter Davison's Doctor wrong...its a really great short and its what got me into Classic Who (even though I started with a Tom Baker story, go figure).
Anyway, the story begins with a Space Ship thats modeled after The Titanic flying around outside Earth's orbit...so no one watching the sky NOTICES this? It'd be pretty hard to miss and The Doctor goes aboard this ship and befriends Kylie Minogue as an alien Stewardess (to be fair, I won't pick on her acting, partially because I'm not sure how much acting experience she's had and partially because...thats only a small problem) and he meets a couple of other aliens dressed in Cowboy suits because...it was a trick from the snobby aliens who said it was fancy dress...even though THEY'RE wearing Early 1910's dress. Don't think too hard about that. There's also an Earth expert who gets everything wrong played by Richard from Keeping Up Appearances(and thats the height of comedy in this episode...oh what, you thought a story about aliens replicating a space ship out of the Titanic would be completely comedic?), the only alien looking alien called Bavacavalatta (I have no idea if I spelled that right) and a stereotypical "asshole" join The Doctor.
Anyway, the General from Tomorrow Never Dies and The World Is Not Enough pilots the Titanic into the path of oncoming meteors mainly because he's mentally flipped. So the goal is that The Doctor has to crawl his way, with the other passengers to the command bridge so they can stop the Titanic falling to Earth (because the WHOLE WORLD needs to be in danger to get emotional investment) while also fighting off "Information Robots" that are in the design of Angels (which, to this special's credit, look really good). Anyway, after a few of them die, The Doctor gives this speech thats supposed to be epic (considering the plot, is THIS where you'd REALLY put an "epic speech"?) and The Doctor asks for the help of one of the other...pilots(?) played by the Werewolf from Being Human and one of the people Russel T. Davies considered for the role of The Doctor after Tennant left (even though I LIKE Russel T Davies...NO! Thats miscasting if ever I've heard it!).
Anyway, The Doctor meets up with the robots and he manipulates them into taking him to their leader (and he acts like he's never said that before even though he said that as Christopher Eccleston, the FIRST DOCTOR FROM NEW WHO AND FROM A SCRIPT THIS SAME WRITER WROTE!) and it turns out that the owner of the company who made this trip possible planned for this to happen (yes I remember what the first sentence was of the previous paragraph!) so there could be a major disaster, killing over 6 billion people because he lost controlling interest in the company and this would bring him back because of the sheer loss of lives...even though he's ON the cruise. One wonders why if that was to be a major disaster he planned to happen (even though that would rely on knowing the Captain would flip) why he'd even be in the same star system? If it failed, he could still make a decent case for his company takeover so...I really have nothing on why he's even there.
Anyway, Kylie Minogue manages to kill him by driving a forklift into him (he's in a 'head chair', a wheelchair if the person using it was just a head) and even though she could've easily, Kylie doesn't bother to get out of the forklift as she's driving it over the edge (at a whopping speed of 5 miles an hour!) and she dies...anyone that stupid was asking for it. The Doctor goes up to the bridge, saves the Titanic JUST AS it was passing over Buckingham Palace (for some unbearably unfunny moments where the Queen and royal guards are in a panic about The Titanic falling) and he manages to pull up just in time and just as The Queen thanks him, even though, old or new, Elizabeth II has never met any incarnation of The Doctor.
This is a really crap story, all around but the cherry on top of the cake is that this episode is dedicated to the memory of Verity Lambert, the first producer of Doctor Who and one of the first Female Producers at the BBC. She was a legend and gave birth to the show as fans know and love it today. And as a personal fan of the William Hartnell era of the show, what she deserved was a story on par with Genesis Of The Daleks, not THIS! This entire episode is BAD! Even by the standards of bad Doctor Who. It would've been laughed out of the writing room in the Colin Baker era and that Doctor had to fight bombs that turn people into trees! Its like one of the writers had a bet that they could get their kid's worst fan fiction of Doctor Who broadcast on Television. Whoever that kid was, I hope he improves as a writer and his father won big.
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