For a price, any organ in your body can be replaced. But it can also be repossessed.
Payment due on April 2 2010
Bad Heart? Bad Liver? Bad Credit? No Problem!!!
The Union's new "Antiforg Payment Plan" is here to help, No matter which organ you need replaced. We have a payment schedule that will keep your body - and your wallet Healthy.
Now Offering: No Down Payment!! Low A.P.R.!!! Call 1-800-GO-UNION or see your local representative for details.
All antiforg's are leased with the consent of The Union. Lessee are subject to background and credit checks at initial signing. Subsequent credit checks may be performed at the lessor's discretion. Repossession of antiforgs may be performed at the lessor's discretion. The Union is not at fault for any and all resulting injuries or fatalities related to antiforg repossession.
Go Ahead. Have The Cheeseburger.
You don't have to live in fear of heart disease or family history of cholesterol. The Union offers state-of-the-heart antiforg technology with payment plans for every budget.
Guys Won't Make Passes At Girls Who Wear Glasses.
Never get called four-eyes again. The Union offers state-of-the-art antiforg techonology with payment plans for every budget.
We Encourage You To Drink Irresponsibly.
New Heart: $975,000
Total Payment: $2,600,000
Cirrhosis of the liver can be fixed by simply signing on the dotted line. The Union offers state-of-the-art technology and payment plans for every budget.