Gossip Girl: [voice-over] Prohibition never stood a chance against exhibition. It's human nature to be free. And no matter how long you try to be good, you can't keep a bad girl down.
Blair Waldorf: You know, I got moves.
Chuck Bass: Really? Then why don't you get up there.
Blair Waldorf: [laughs] I'm just saying, I got moves.
Blair Waldorf: You really don't think I'll go up there.
Chuck Bass: I know you won't do it.
Blair Waldorf: Guard my drink.
Victrola Trannie: Who's that girl?
Chuck Bass: I have no idea...
Gossip Girl: Prohibition never stood a chance against exhibition.
Chuck Bass: Nathaniel, your position in my esteem has been replaced by your voicemail. So Bart didn't go for Victrola but seems I've already bought the house out for tonight and it's not a party without my people or any people I'll see you there.
[Chuck goes and sits on the ground]
Lily van der Woodsen: Long night?
Chuck Bass: Alfonso made me an omlette, I may have washed it down with a or two.
Lily van der Woodsen: Father didn't go for your business proposal?
[Chucks shakes his head no]
Lily van der Woodsen: Come on.
[Lily helps him up]
Lily van der Woodsen: Let me help you.
Chuck Bass: He was born poor, I was born loaded but if the only way to impress him was if I started with nothing then why doesn't he just take it all away.
Lily van der Woodsen: Because he loves you. No good parent likes to see his child go without.
Chuck Bass: I had the idea. I did the work. He tells me I can't be committed and he's the one screwing 25 year olds, when he's supposedly committed to you.
Lily van der Woodsen: We're newly committed as recent as last week.
Chuck Bass: I wonder why he was pawing some asian chick in his limo yesterday.
Lily van der Woodsen: How could I be surprised really. Excuse me.
Lily van der Woodsen: [sees Rufus dusting the ceiling] Well... this is a new strain of obsessive compulsive.
Rufus Humphrey: The new art piece projects up to the ceiling.
Lily van der Woodsen: Oh, still doing anything to get a girl on her back, huh?
Dan Humphrey: What? What? Did I do something wrong? I knew the hair thing was too much.
Blair Waldorf: What are you doing?
Nate Archibald: Going to Victrola. I promised Chuck it's important to him.
Blair Waldorf: I saw your father get arrested. Why didn't you come to me, I would've listened.
Nate Archibald: I've tried Blair. But everytime I try something's got your attention, a dinner party, ya know a masked ball.
Blair Waldorf: Yeah, let's talk about that masked ball. Let's talk about how while I was waiting for you to find so that we could finally be together, you were confessing your feelings and kissing Serena. I thought I was doing everything right.
Nate Archibald: It's not your fault.
Blair Waldorf: Do you love me?
Blair Waldorf: You should deal with your father. He needs you. You know what, I don't.
Chuck Bass: Alfonso made me an omelette. I may have washed it down with a Belini or two.
Gossip Girl: [voice-over] Jenny Humphrey's rise to the penthouse was short and sweet, but if she crosses Blair Waldorf, it's straight back to the basement.
Dan Humphrey: Sex is meaningful, like art. And you don't rush art.
Blair Waldorf: [to Chuck, at the opening of his club] I think we just broke up. I don't want to talk about it. I just want to escape. That's what this place is for, right?
Blair Waldorf: So... I heard on Gossip Girl that your having sex with Dan out here - in streaming video.
Serena van der Woodsen: Oh, god Kati and Is filmed us.
Blair Waldorf: Well it's not very high school musical scandalas and no they haven't stream it yet but... I heard it was... aggresive.
Serena van der Woodsen: I must say Dan has been surprisingly good at everything we've done.
Blair Waldorf: Which is everthing?
Serena van der Woodsen: No but feel free to ask any personal questions.
Blair Waldorf: Well you've talked about it, right?
Serena van der Woodsen: No mom we haven't.
Blair Waldorf: May I remind you that this is your first real boyfriend S and in relationships you talk about stuff.
Serena van der Woodsen: I know but I dunno sometimes talking about it or planning it can ruin a good thing, ya know?
Blair Waldorf: I would know. Well, as long as your not worried.
Serena van der Woodsen: Well, I'm not but I dunno he might be. Is it possible for a guy to want to slow things down?
Blair Waldorf: Only the guys we like.
[the girls laugh]
Blair Waldorf: But with you, I can't imagine why.
Chuck Bass: Nathaniel! Your position in my esteem has been replaced by your voice mail.
Serena van der Woodsen: Is it possible for a guy to want to slow things down?
Nate Archibald: Oh, Serena right?
Jenny Humphrey: That's funny.
Nate Archibald: Not really, no.
Jenny Humphrey: No. Uh what are you doing in the girls hall?
Nate Archibald: I was actually looking for you. Ya know I really didn't mean anything I said about having feelings for Serena.
Jenny Humphrey: Maybe you didn't. I just... I mean... I don't even care but other people might.
Nate Archibald: Yeah I know.
Jenny Humphrey: Yeah I know including my brother.
[Nate starts to give her chocolates]
Jenny Humphrey: You bought me chocolates?
Nate Archibald: Well, I know you care about being friends with Blair and your brother, he's with Serena, and I'm with Blair, and I just really need you to help me out here, you promise?
Blair Waldorf: Promise what?
Nate Archibald: Uh, promise to help me come up with a more creative apology than these. I'm sorry for taking you for granted lately, okay.
[Gives Blair the chocolates he was giving Jenny]
Blair Waldorf: That is so sweet. I mean i prefer the gold collection but thank you.
[Jenny starts to leave]
Blair Waldorf: Hey Cinderella, I think you dropped this at the ball.
[holds up the bracelet]
Blair Waldorf: I hate secrets more than anything, you know that. Friends don't lie and we're friends, right?
Jenny Humphrey: Right.
Jenny Humphrey: Thanks for helping me out with the bracelet. I didn't know broken glass could cost that much.
Blair Waldorf: Well, it was my pleasure. Oh, wait, no, it wasn't. Game recognizes game little J but you have to show more respect. This is the last time I've helped you, next time you cross me I won't be as forgiving.
Jenny Humphrey: Don't worry there won't be a next time.
Blair Waldorf: Good, cause I wanna tell you something. Something nobody knows, not even Serena. You can keep a secret right?
Jenny Humphrey: Of course.
Blair Waldorf: Nate is planning on giving me his family diamond. It's the most incredible ring you've ever seen.
Jenny Humphrey: Uh, ring, as in engagement ring?
Blair Waldorf: I remember the first time I ever saw him. Maybe we were just little kids but I knew, he's the one I wanna marry, and now it seems like he feels the same way too.
[Jenny just stands there and doesn't say anything]
Blair Waldorf: Why are you not happy for me?
Jenny Humphrey: I'm sorry it's, it's just been a really weird week, um there's this stuff with my parents and my family so maybe I should just go.
Blair Waldorf: No maybe you should look at me in the eye and tell me what you're hiding. Are you jealous?
Jenny Humphrey: Of you and Nate?
Blair Waldorf: Do you like him?
Jenny Humphrey: Uh, no.
Blair Waldorf: You think cause you talked to him once in the hall you might have a shot?
Jenny Humphrey: Blair, it's nothing like that.
Blair Waldorf: Then tell me what is it like?
Jenny Humphrey: I don't wanna hurt you.
Blair Waldorf: How could you hurt me?
Jenny Humphrey: Yesterday wasn't the first time I talked to Nate. At the ball he told me he wasn't over Serena.
Blair Waldorf: Why would he tell you that?
Jenny Humphrey: Because I was wearing her mask and he thought I was her - he kissed me.
Blair Waldorf: That's enough.
Jenny Humphrey: Blair... I didn't want you to find out.
Blair Waldorf: Your dismissed Jenny, for good.
Jenny Humphrey: [Jenny leaves]