Vampire Killers (2009)
Fletch: Hahahahahahahaha! It's got a big metal cock for a handle!
Fletch: Yep, lesbian vampires. Just another one of God's cruel tricks to get on my tits. Even dead women'd sooner sleep with each other than get with me it would appear. But eatin' me alive, oh no, that's fine. Next time he'll have me bummed by a big gay werewolf I swear.