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Vampire Killers (2009)
"Lesbian Vampire Killers" (original title)

R  |   |  Action, Comedy, Horror  |  20 March 2009 (UK)
5.2
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Ratings: 5.2/10 from 16,197 users  
Reviews: 88 user | 104 critic

Their women having been enslaved by the local pack of lesbian vampires thanks to an ancient curse, the remaining menfolk of a rural town send two hapless young lads out onto the moors as a sacrifice.

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Cast

Cast overview, first billed only:
...
Margarita Hall ...
Daughter of Darkness 1
...
Daughter of Darkness 2
...
Jimmy
...
Emma Clifford ...
Ms Rossi
...
Fletch
...
Steve
...
Blonde
...
...
Anke
...
Trudi
...
Heidi
John Pierce Jones ...
Landlord (as John Pierce-Jones)
...
Sidney Goatherder No.7 / The Storyteller
Edit

Storyline

Centuries ago, Baron Wolfgang MacLaren vanquished the Vampire Queen Carmilla in the remote Cragwich; however, before decapitating the evil vampire, she curses the locals and descendants of the baron, swearing that every woman would turn into a lesbian vampire on the eighteenth birthday. On the present days, the clumsy and naive cuckold Jimmy is dumped again by his girlfriend Judy and misses her. His best friend Fletch is fired in his job of clown after hitting an annoying boy. The two friends are broken and decide to camp in the countryside to forget their problems, and Jimmy throws a dart in a map in a pub to decide where they should go. They head to Cragwich and when they arrive in the bar Baron's Rest, they see four hot girls leaving the place in a Kombi. The innkeeper offers the old Mircalla cottage in the woods for them, the same place the girls will lodge. Meanwhile, Lotte, Heide, Anke and Trudi have trouble with their van and Jimmy and Fletch reach them in the forest and they ... Written by Claudio Carvalho, Rio de Janeiro, Brazil

Plot Summary | Plot Synopsis

Taglines:

They Won't Go Down Without a Bite. See more »

Genres:

Action | Comedy | Horror

Motion Picture Rating (MPAA)

Rated R for language, sexual content and horror violence | See all certifications »

Parents Guide:

 »
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Details

Country:

Language:

Release Date:

20 March 2009 (UK)  »

Also Known As:

Vampire Killers  »

Box Office

Opening Weekend:

£648,634 (UK) (20 March 2009)

Gross:

£1,581,373 (UK) (3 April 2009)
 »

Company Credits

Show detailed on  »

Technical Specs

Runtime:

| (European Film Market)

Sound Mix:

Color:

Aspect Ratio:

2.35 : 1
See  »
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Did You Know?

Trivia

Writers Stewart Williams and Paul Hupfield were challenged to think of the dumbest and yet most commercial title possible for a film, Lesbian Vampire Killers was the answer. They then went away and wrote the script. See more »

Quotes

Fletch: Yep, lesbian vampires. Just another one of God's cruel tricks to get on my tits. Even dead women'd sooner sleep with each other than get with me it would appear. But eatin' me alive, oh no, that's fine. Next time he'll have me bummed by a big gay werewolf I swear.
See more »

Connections

Featured in Here I Am (2011) See more »

Soundtracks

Saturday Night
(Riva / Pignagnoli)
Published by Energy Production Srl/Off Limits
Performed by Whigfield
(C) (p) 1994 Energy Production Srl
Licensed courtesy of Energy Production Srl
See more »

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User Reviews

 
Modern day Abbott and Costello meet the Lesbian Vampires
27 June 2009 | by (United States) – See all my reviews

So I can't understand the poor rating for this film, except to think it was marketed to the wrong people (by accident).

What this film is not... 1) A horror film. There are no scares, it's not a fright fest. It's not even really what I would term "gory". 2) This is not Evil Dead, or Shawn or the Dead, but more like Army of Darkness. 3) This is not a porn film, there is little nudity, but if you like to see hot ladies, barely clothed, then...

What this film is... 1) Pure camp and all out laughs 2) lots of action and hilarious special effects. 3) An amazing soundtrack even for a high budget A movie. 4) Non stop memorable scenes and one liners. Based on a lot of reviews from IMDb, critics, and other sites, it seems many who watched this film expected something quite different. To me it's a modern day comic masterpiece Cordon as Fletch and McGann as the Vicar were my favorite characters. The beautiful lead vampires played by Silvia and Vera were amazing and right there as well. The rest of the cast (Mathew and Myanna especially) were also great and did just what they needed to do.

This movie is fun sober or wasted. Enjoy either way just take things a little less seriously...


45 of 64 people found this review helpful.  Was this review helpful to you?

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