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Vampire Killers (2009)
"Lesbian Vampire Killers" (original title)

 -  Action | Comedy | Horror  -  20 March 2009 (UK)
5.2
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Ratings: 5.2/10 from 15,798 users  
Reviews: 88 user | 105 critic

Their women having been enslaved by the local pack of lesbian vampires thanks to an ancient curse, the remaining menfolk of a rural town send two hapless young lads out onto the moors as a sacrifice.

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Cast

Cast overview, first billed only:
...
Margarita Hall ...
Daughter of Darkness 1
Sianad Gregory ...
Daughter of Darkness 2
...
Jimmy
...
Emma Clifford ...
Ms Rossi
...
Fletch
...
Steve
...
Blonde
...
...
Anke
...
Trudi
...
Heidi
John Pierce Jones ...
Landlord (as John Pierce-Jones)
...
Sidney Goatherder No.7 / The Storyteller
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Storyline

Centuries ago, Baron Wolfgang MacLaren vanquished the Vampire Queen Carmilla in the remote Cragwich; however, before decapitating the evil vampire, she curses the locals and descendants of the baron, swearing that every woman would turn into a lesbian vampire on the eighteenth birthday. On the present days, the clumsy and naive cuckold Jimmy is dumped again by his girlfriend Judy and misses her. His best friend Fletch is fired in his job of clown after hitting an annoying boy. The two friends are broken and decide to camp in the countryside to forget their problems, and Jimmy throws a dart in a map in a pub to decide where they should go. They head to Cragwich and when they arrive in the bar Baron's Rest, they see four hot girls leaving the place in a Kombi. The innkeeper offers the old Mircalla cottage in the woods for them, the same place the girls will lodge. Meanwhile, Lotte, Heide, Anke and Trudi have trouble with their van and Jimmy and Fletch reach them in the forest and they ... Written by Claudio Carvalho, Rio de Janeiro, Brazil

Plot Summary | Plot Synopsis

Taglines:

They Won't Go Down Without a Bite. See more »

Genres:

Action | Comedy | Horror

Motion Picture Rating (MPAA)

Rated R for language, sexual content and horror violence | See all certifications »

Parents Guide:

 »
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Details

Country:

Language:

Release Date:

20 March 2009 (UK)  »

Also Known As:

Vampire Killers  »

Box Office

Opening Weekend:

£648,634 (UK) (20 March 2009)

Gross:

£1,581,373 (UK) (3 April 2009)
 »

Company Credits

Show detailed on  »

Technical Specs

Runtime:

| (European Film Market)

Sound Mix:

Color:

Aspect Ratio:

2.35 : 1
See  »
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Did You Know?

Trivia

Ashley Mulheron was initially envisioned for the role of Heidi. See more »

Quotes

Fletch: Hahahahahahahaha! It's got a big metal cock for a handle!
See more »


Soundtracks

Crying Blood
(V.V. Brown (as V V Brown))
Published by EMI Music Publishing
Performed by V.V. Brown (as V V Brown)
Licensed courtesy of Universal-Island Records Ltd
Under license from Universal Music Operations
See more »

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User Reviews

 
Wishes it were Shaun of the Dead with Vampires
13 March 2009 | by (London, England) – See all my reviews

There is one word for this film: Weak. If you think you're going to get Shaun Of The Dead with vampires as one comment suggests you will be massively disappointed.

This film is not without it's laughs, but sadly they are few and far between and mostly in the trailer (the werewolf line is still the best in the whole film so work out how much that made you laugh in the trailer, figure that's the best you're getting and decide from there).

It is only 87 minutes but it still manages to get dull, something Shaun avoided. It does not have the deft lightness, charm and flow of Shaun and this is largely due to sub-Carry On writing that thinks it's funny when you are rolling eyes and groaning. The direction is lazy and feels more like one of the standard rubbish 'Brit comedian(s) comedy' like Sex Lives Of The Potato Men or Parole Officer. It's better than Potato Men of course - on a sort of level with Parole Officer I suppose or the Oz comedy Black Sheep.

Perhaps if Horne and Corden had written it, as Pegg and Wright did for Shaun, it would have worked for them better. But this is a weak film that only comes off as the pair trying (and failing) to do their own Shaun. Avoid unless a die-hard Horne and Corden fan, and even then you'll have to talk yourself into enjoying it if you're sober!


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