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"NCIS" Trojan Horse (TV Episode 2007) Poster

(TV Series)

(2007)

Quotes

NCIS Director Jenny Shepard: [calling her private line from Paris] Hello Cynthia... hello... Cynthia?

Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Noooooooo...

NCIS Director Jenny Shepard: Jethro, I should have recognized the heavy breathing. Is the Agency intact?

Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: I cut it up into small bits and pieces and sold it to the three letter boys.

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Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: I had a wife like you once, Cynthia. I divorced her.

Cynthia Sumner: Beat her to it, did you?

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[Gibbs ignores an incoming call from Cynthia]

Dr. Donald Mallard: That wouldn't have been your assistant, would it, Director?

Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: I do hate a nagging woman, Duck.

Dr. Donald Mallard: [chuckling] She's only doing her job, Jethro.

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Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: [having been caught talking about something other than their investigation] I know, boss. This isn't TV trivia. A dead man was left on our doorstep clutching a hit list. Well, not exactly clutching, but with a hit list in his wallet, and we have to find the two names on the list that haven't been hit yet before they are hit.

Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: No, DiNozzo.

Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: No?

Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: We have to find the dirtbag that KILLED THE OTHER FIVE!

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NCIS Director Jenny Shepard: [to Gibbs about being "acting" director] I take it walking in my heels has presented a challenge.

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NCIS Director Jenny Shepard: [talking to Cynthia from Paris] Put him back on.

Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Yeeeesssss...

NCIS Director Jenny Shepard: Is there any serious business I should know about?

Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Well, the Buy America toilet paper doesn't fit the metric fixture and we got to turn...

NCIS Director Jenny Shepard: [she hangs up on him, cutting him off mid sentence]

Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: [to Cynthia] She hung up on me.

Cynthia Sumner: [sarcastically] Shocking.

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Officer Ziva David: You're comparing me to your mother?

Joe Kelly: Just around the eyes. Maybe the mouth.

Officer Ziva David: [to Gibbs] PERMISSION TO SHOOT!

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NCIS Director Jenny Shepard: [talking to Gibbs on the phone from Paris] Put Cynthia on.

Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Hey how's the Frog...

[long pause]

Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: ...legs. You always enjoyed them sauteed in butter.

NCIS Director Jenny Shepard: [angrily] CYNTHIA NOW!

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Special Agent Timothy McGee: What are you looking for?

Abby Sciuto: Gibbs. He has this uncanny way of just showing up whenever I make a discovery.

Special Agent Timothy McGee: He's a little bit off his game since he's been playing director.

Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: [on the videophone behind McGee and Abby] Is that so, McGee?

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Special Agent Timothy McGee: They're desperate.

Abby Sciuto: They're like drowning men grasping at thin polystyrene tubes.

Special Agent Timothy McGee: I was going to say straws, but I do like that idiom better.

Abby Sciuto: Because mines more accurate! I mean, does saying 'grasping at straws' tell you if they're made out of paper or glass or metal or polystyrene? No!

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Abby Sciuto: Oh, this cab is bringing back memories. Cheap vinyl, plastic divider, dirty floors. Actually, these floors are pretty clean. The ones I remember were dirty.

Special Agent Timothy McGee: Let me guess. Short-lived career as a cabby?

Abby Sciuto: A short-lived encounter. A ship in the night.

Special Agent Timothy McGee: Ooh.

Abby Sciuto: My first time.

Officer Ziva David: For what?

Special Agent Timothy McGee: Front seat or back?

Abby Sciuto: Back. Well, both, kind of.

Officer Ziva David: Oh! My first time was in a weapons carrier.

Abby SciutoSpecial Agent Timothy McGee: Of course it was.

Officer Ziva David: Where was the cabby when this encounter took place?

Abby Sciuto: He was a cabby. Putting himself through school. It was his first time too.

Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: First time for what?

Abby Sciuto: Seeing a curling match, Gibbs. Haver you ever seen a curling match? The pristine ice and those little brooms that sweep.

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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