Proud American (2008)

User Rating:

1.9/10   

Director:

Fred Ashman

Writer:

Fred Ashman (writer)

Release Date:

12 September 2008 (USA)

Genre:

Documentary | Drama

Tagline:

It's about what binds us as Americans, not what separates us.

Plot:

Cast

Cecelia Antoinette	...	Grams
Marie Antoinette
Michelle Ashman	...	Katie
Jonathan Banks	...	Mr. Moretti
Jon Jon Briones	...	Dawn's Father
Kimberlin Brown	...	Lisa
Hayley Chase	...	Megan
Ryan Christiansen	...	Bobby
Michael G. Davis	...	Carlos Moleda
Chris Emerson	...	Michael
Grant Goodeve	...	Naval Doctor
Sara Hackney	...	Helen Walton
Dennis Haskins	...	Bill
Richard Kaszonyi	...	Tom (as Richard Garon)
Devon Marie King	...	Med Student
Dufflyn Lammers	...	Julie Rogers
Jane Le	...	Dawn Trang
Koda Madison	...	Annie
Marc McClure	...	Sam
Rob Moran	...	AJ
Fallon Okwuosa	...	Lisa
Laurel Page	...	Teacher
Andrew Ramaglia	...	Steve
Tenille Repinski	...	Nurse
Mackenzie Rosman	...	Bree
Julie Skon	...	Sarah
Salina Soto	...	Lucy
Phil Tanchon	...	Skateboarder
Tom Townsend	...	Steven
Sean Welch	...	Las Vegas Groom
Joseph Williamson	...	Med Student Eric Jameson

MPAA:

Rated PG for some mild thematic elements.

Runtime:

USA:115 min

Country:

USA

Language:

English

Color:

Color

Aspect Ratio:

1.44 : 1

Sound Mix:

Sonics-DDP (IMAX version) | Dolby Digital (35 mm prints) (D-Cinema prints)

Certification:

USA:PG

Filming Locations:

Albuquerque, New Mexico, USA

World's Most Expensive After-School Special

If you're reading this review, you are probably aware that this film has the lowest opening box office of all time among wide releases. I believe the weekend total was around $120/screen, or about 15-20 tickets per screen. That's one or two tickets per showing.

That would jibe with my experience. I was hoping to see if the theater would show a movie to a single patron. I ended up sharing the theater with an elderly couple, with the husband clearly in the early stages of Alzheimer's. His occasional loud comments, such as "I don't get it", "Firetrucks", and "This is stupid" actually added quite a bit to the otherwise minimal entertainment value.

Is it, as the box office would seem to indicate, the worst movie ever made? No, but giving this thing a theatrical release has to rate as a pretty bone-headed decision. Then again, I suspect that what this proves is that the super-rich are not like you and me. If you are H. Ross Perot or the president of Coca-Cola, then you can not only pay to have an homage to the American Way made, you can also pull strings and force theater chains across the country to clear 750 screens for a film that plays more like an extended ABC After-School Special. Since this is such a business-oriented movie, I kept thinking about all the lost income for all the theaters showing this film to such minuscule crowds.

Well, I guess I should move on and actually review this flick. The film opens and closes with some very nice panoramic shots of various places all across the USA. I enjoyed those parts - not enough to pay for 90 minutes of that, but they were clearly the best part of the movie.

In between, the movie has a series of documentary-style vignettes. There are 3 long ones and maybe 2 or 3 shorter stories, along with about 8 or 10 30-second success stories. The 5 or 6 extended stories ("based on true stories") all feature actors, rather than the actual people. They were all designed to celebrate one facet or another of America - perseverance, opportunity, tolerance, etc.

Me? I thought they were all very ham-handed. There was distracting music overlaid on the stories, meant to underscore the particular lesson being taught, and everything wrapped up so nicely. The whole thing seemed much more appropriate for a school classroom than for a theater. I would bet the producers are already heated up the presses for "Teacher's Guides" for this movie. Given the extreme corporate backing, I bet this gets distributed for free to schools. For something like a middle-school classroom, it wouldn't be that bad.

P.S. I loved the product placement for Coca-Cola and American Airlines throughout the film. Also, Yakov Smirnoff makes an appearance in this film for no good reason.

Overall, seeing this film was good for a laugh, but I cannot recommend it.