This is a slasher film with no nudity. It does have a muddled concept, amateurish editing, an excess of bland characters and enough expository dialog to choke a rhino, but a slasher movie with no nudity is like a peanut butter and jelly sandwich that has neither peanuts nor jelly. What's the point?
Attempting to mix a poorly thought out take on reality television with the same sort of generic violence you can see in a thousand other cheap horror flicks, Killer Movie is about a TV crew from Hollywood that's taken up residence in a small North Dakota town. They're supposed to be making a reality show about one thing, but the producer (Cyia Batten) wants to change the focus to something more tawdry and sensational, causing friction with the show's newly hired director (Paul Wesley). There's also an out-of-control celebutante (Kaley Cuoco) who's signed up to be a production assistant on the show as research for her next film and, of course, a masked killer who appears to be shooting his own reality show.
I'm sure you know the drill. People get slaughtered, there's a mystery about who is responsible and blah, blah, blah. In this case, however, the phrase "blah, blah, blah" is especially appropriate because it accurately describes at least 50% of this movie. Characters are constantly explaining things, both to each other and to the audience though the use of reality show style "confessionals" where they talk directly into the camera. A movie is supposed to show, not tell. All Killer Movie does is tell and tell and tell and tell and none of it is smart or funny or insightful. Imagine a Kevin Smith script written after Kevin Smith had suffered a very serious head injury. That's what this film is like.
There are only two halfway decent characters in this tale, but they aren't the main hero or the masked killer. The main hero is good looking and generally concerned about other people. That's the sum total of his personality. The masked killer is defined by a wristwatch and eyeliner. No, you didn't read that wrong. The masked killer has a wristwatch and wears eyeliner and that's everything there is to him. The interesting characters are the relentless bitch of a producer and the foul-mouthed starlet, nicely portrayed by Cyia Batten and Kaley Cuoco. They're not exactly Shakespearean in their complexity, but they have strong personalities and understandable agendas. Pretty much everyone else in the cast is just waiting around to get killed. I supposed you can give writer/director Jeff Fisher some credit for coming up with at least two intriguing characters. Not much credit, though, because he does nothing at all of interest with either of them.
I also couldn't stand the editing of Killer Movie and a film's editing has got to be really atrocious for me to even notice it, let alone be annoyed by it. The persistent and superfluous use of establishing shots is what got to me. You know how when scenes change in a movie, the next scene will start with a shot of where it is. A scene on a boat will end and then you'll see a building because the next scene in that building. Well, this film takes that principle to ridiculous lengths. For example, if the next scene is in the local high school, we won't just get a shot of the high school to establish things. No, first there will be a shot of the countryside to, I guess, remind us the story is taking place in North Dakota. Then there will be a shot of the school. Then there will be a shot inside the school, but NOT of where the next scene is taking place. Only after all that will we get to the next scene.
And even though this movie sucks, writer/director Fisher still sticks an open-ended conclusion on it that's so blatant, he's essentially getting down on his hands and knees begging for the chance to make a sequel. It's like going to a restaurant and eating a meal that makes you sick to your stomach, then getting a coupon so you can eat for free on your next visit.
As terrible as Killer Movie is, there are plenty of attractive actresses in the cast and if even some of them had gotten naked, that would have at least been something nice to look at. The essence of slasher movies leans toward crap, which is why nudity is so commonly added to the mix to distract from the overall crumminess of the product. Without it, a slasher movie needs to be especially intelligent and thoughtful just to make it to average. Killer Movie is dumb, shallow and nobody takes off their clothes. Rush right out and watch something else.
Attempting to mix a poorly thought out take on reality television with the same sort of generic violence you can see in a thousand other cheap horror flicks, Killer Movie is about a TV crew from Hollywood that's taken up residence in a small North Dakota town. They're supposed to be making a reality show about one thing, but the producer (Cyia Batten) wants to change the focus to something more tawdry and sensational, causing friction with the show's newly hired director (Paul Wesley). There's also an out-of-control celebutante (Kaley Cuoco) who's signed up to be a production assistant on the show as research for her next film and, of course, a masked killer who appears to be shooting his own reality show.
I'm sure you know the drill. People get slaughtered, there's a mystery about who is responsible and blah, blah, blah. In this case, however, the phrase "blah, blah, blah" is especially appropriate because it accurately describes at least 50% of this movie. Characters are constantly explaining things, both to each other and to the audience though the use of reality show style "confessionals" where they talk directly into the camera. A movie is supposed to show, not tell. All Killer Movie does is tell and tell and tell and tell and none of it is smart or funny or insightful. Imagine a Kevin Smith script written after Kevin Smith had suffered a very serious head injury. That's what this film is like.
There are only two halfway decent characters in this tale, but they aren't the main hero or the masked killer. The main hero is good looking and generally concerned about other people. That's the sum total of his personality. The masked killer is defined by a wristwatch and eyeliner. No, you didn't read that wrong. The masked killer has a wristwatch and wears eyeliner and that's everything there is to him. The interesting characters are the relentless bitch of a producer and the foul-mouthed starlet, nicely portrayed by Cyia Batten and Kaley Cuoco. They're not exactly Shakespearean in their complexity, but they have strong personalities and understandable agendas. Pretty much everyone else in the cast is just waiting around to get killed. I supposed you can give writer/director Jeff Fisher some credit for coming up with at least two intriguing characters. Not much credit, though, because he does nothing at all of interest with either of them.
I also couldn't stand the editing of Killer Movie and a film's editing has got to be really atrocious for me to even notice it, let alone be annoyed by it. The persistent and superfluous use of establishing shots is what got to me. You know how when scenes change in a movie, the next scene will start with a shot of where it is. A scene on a boat will end and then you'll see a building because the next scene in that building. Well, this film takes that principle to ridiculous lengths. For example, if the next scene is in the local high school, we won't just get a shot of the high school to establish things. No, first there will be a shot of the countryside to, I guess, remind us the story is taking place in North Dakota. Then there will be a shot of the school. Then there will be a shot inside the school, but NOT of where the next scene is taking place. Only after all that will we get to the next scene.
And even though this movie sucks, writer/director Fisher still sticks an open-ended conclusion on it that's so blatant, he's essentially getting down on his hands and knees begging for the chance to make a sequel. It's like going to a restaurant and eating a meal that makes you sick to your stomach, then getting a coupon so you can eat for free on your next visit.
As terrible as Killer Movie is, there are plenty of attractive actresses in the cast and if even some of them had gotten naked, that would have at least been something nice to look at. The essence of slasher movies leans toward crap, which is why nudity is so commonly added to the mix to distract from the overall crumminess of the product. Without it, a slasher movie needs to be especially intelligent and thoughtful just to make it to average. Killer Movie is dumb, shallow and nobody takes off their clothes. Rush right out and watch something else.
