- Lauren Cooper: Can I ask you a question?
- Mr. Logan: Not just now.
- Lauren Cooper: Can I ask you a question now?
- Mr. Logan: Just wait.
- Lauren Cooper: Can I ask you a question? I only want to ask you a question. Can't I ask you a question? I'm just asking you a question. Can I ASK you a QUESTION?
- Mr. Logan: What is it?
- Lauren Cooper: Are you the Doctor?
- Mr. Logan: ...Doctor Who?
- Lauren Cooper: Are you English, sir?
- Mr. Logan: No, I'm Scottish.
- Lauren Cooper: So you ain't English, then?
- Mr. Logan: No, I'm British.
- Lauren Cooper: So you ain't English, then?
- Mr. Logan: No, I'm not. But as you can see, I do speak English.
- Lauren Cooper: But I can't understand what you're saying, sir.
- Mr. Logan: Well, clearly you can.
- Lauren Cooper: Sorry, are you talking Scottish now?
- Mr. Logan: No, I'm talking English.
- Lauren Cooper: Right, don't sound like it.
- Lauren Cooper: I don't think that you're quite qualified to teach us English.
- Mr. Logan: I am perfectly qualified to teach you English.
- Lauren Cooper: I don't think you are, though.
- Mr. Logan: You don't have to be English to teach it.
- Lauren Cooper: Right... have we got double English... or double Scottish?
- Mr. Logan: I'm not the Doctor, I'm your English teacher!
- Lauren Cooper: I don't think you are, though!
- Mr. Logan: Lauren...
- Lauren Cooper: I think you're a nine hundred an' forty-five year old Time Lord!
- Mr. Logan: Listen...
- Lauren Cooper: Did ya just pitch up from Mars?
- Mr. Logan: Don't be ridiculous.
- Lauren Cooper: You know your house, right?
- Mr. Logan: What?
- Lauren Cooper: You know your house?
- Mr. Logan: Yeah?
- Lauren Cooper: Is it bigger on the inside?
- Mr. Logan: Be quiet!
- Lauren Cooper: Did you park the TARDIS on the meter?
- Lauren Cooper: Do you fancy Billie Piper, sir?
- Mr. Logan: Right!
- [slams book on table]
- Mr. Logan: You are the most insolent child I have ever had the misfortune to teach!
- Lauren Cooper: Thank you.
- Mr. Logan: You're pointless, repetitious, and extremely dull!
- Lauren Cooper: Bit like Shakespeare.
- Mr. Logan: You are not even worthy to mention his name! William Shakes - William Shakespeare was a genius! You, little madam, are definitely not! Now just sit there, keep your mouth shut, or I will fail you in this whole module right now!
- Lauren Cooper: [tsks] Amest I bovveréd?