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The highly skilled Federale Machete is hired by some unsavory types to assassinate a senator. But just as he's about to take the shot, he notices someone aiming at him and realizes he's been set up. He barely survives the sniper's bullet, and is soon out for revenge on his former employers, with the reluctant assistance of his brother Cheech Marin, who has become a priest and taken a vow of nonviolence. If you hire him to take out the bad guys, make sure the bad guys aren't you! Written by
When Michael Booth enters the house and starts shooting everyone with a silenced gun, the first man's head gets shot before we hear the sound of a gun. See more »
[in Spanish; subtitled]
We're federal agents, not martyrs. This is suicide. She's just another kidnap victim.
[holding up picture]
What makes her special? Because she's a witness against Torrez? He probably has her locked up, drugged our of her mind. We don't have to do this!
If not us, then who?
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Before the end credits roll: "Machete will return in Machete Kills (2013) and Machete Kills Again." See more »
When I saw the trailer for this film I thought it had to be trash but I laughed almost from the beginning to the end. Tongue in cheek humour - it's all intentional, there is nothing unfunny about Machete.
I was ready for a lot of gore but it was all done in such a hilarious way that I hardly noticed how disgusting it was. I fact, I was still laughing 5 minutes after I left the cinema.
If he wasn't already so old I would say Danny Trejo was an undiscovered talent set for a meteoric rise, but the guy is already 64. I never could have guessed as the adrenaline and action pumped incessantly.... and hysterically this weather-beaten old dude also managed effortlessly to bed any chiquita he came across, and in style too.
Machete kills and maims and has sex all the way through the movie, but amazingly he is also a gentleman. you have to love him.
The best movie I have seen this year and the best movie of this genre for some time. Top marks for not taking itself one bit seriously but knowing exactly how to entertain!
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