Wayne Malloy: [narrating voice over] I'm Wayne Malloy. My family and I are travelers. Our kind have been living in this country for a hundred and fifty years. We're not listed in the phone book, we don't have social security numbers, we live off the grid. Some people call us gypsies, some call us thieves. Most of them don't even know we exist.
Hugh Panetta: [to Wayne, who is pretending to be Doug Rich] So Doug, got a little matter I need ya to handle. A P.R. thing, no big deal, right up your alley.
[scene cuts to angry crowd.]
Martin Chambers: Panco sucks!
Wayne Malloy: [pretending to be Mr. Rich] Mr. Chambers, we're not interested in people or pets blowing up. I mean, I mean, we're completely against anyone blowing up, I mean, even a little bit. But you know sometimes-sometimes in your life, shit just happens, you know? You know it does. I mean, you're just going along, living your own life, living in your house, just minding your own business, suddenly, kapow! Your whole life explodes. Just like in -uh, Well, but then, what are you gonna do? You gonna give up? You gonna just call it a day? No. No, no, that's not what we do. No, we rally. We-we turn it all around. Because we're Americans. We take those grenades and we turn 'em into lemonade. Because that's what distinguishes us from sand crabs. We keep going. And I ask this of you because I ask nothing less of myself. Thank you. Thank you for your time.
Hugh Panetta: This was your divorce, right?
Wayne Malloy: [pretending to be Doug Rich] Yes. It was a traumatic. So I've just blacked everything out.
Di Di Malloy: [pretending to be Di Di Rich, about the Buchanan's] But no, I don't think that they ever accepted him, because he wasn't born like them-rich. You know, he had all that money, and he threw all those parties and stuff, but when it really comes down to it, people just want to stick to their own kind.
Teacher: Hmm. But Gatsby had money. Why wasn't he happy?
Di Di Malloy: [pretending to be Di Di Rich] Well, all the money in the world couldn't buy what he really wanted-the girl. You know, money isn't everything. I guess... he just never really figured that out.
Brent: So hot shit, can you break into anything else?
Cael Malloy: [pretending to be Cael Rich] What did you have in mind?
Jim Burns: Hey, neighbors. You got here before we all take ecstasy and dive naked into the pool.
Wayne Malloy: [pretending to be Doug Rich] Seriously?
Jim Burns: It's happened.
Hugh Panetta: [to Dahlia, pretending to be Cherein Rich] Been there, done that.
Dahlia Malloy: [pretending to be Cherein Rich] We're Jewish now.
Dahlia Malloy: [pretending to be Cherein Rich] Jesus!
Dahlia Malloy: I'm beat. You comin'?
[Wayne follows Dahlia to the steps. Dahlia yawns.]
Dahlia Malloy: Oh, by the way, we're Jewish.
[Wayne stares into space.]
Dahlia Malloy: Kids okay?
Wayne Malloy: Di Di's screwing around with Guitar and Cael must be out with that neighborhood kid.