Imagine a parallel earth where vampires have cut a swath through humanity. The disease is so bad, the ravenous bloodsuckers begin feeding on each other. Three surviving humans create a jump... See full summary »
It's Halloween night, and slacker video clerk Stan Helsing along with his insanely sexy ex-girlfriend , best buddy and an exotic dancer/'massage therapist' - detours into a town cursed by ... See full summary »
Cocky cockney snooker player Billy Kid accepts the challenge of a grudge match from Maxwell Randall (the Green Baize Vampire), six times world champion; the loser will never play ... See full summary »
A faux-documentary about wife swapping clubs in the L.A. area. A reporter interviews the vice cop. The first 40 minutes is a semi-sex orgy. The guys do not take off their pants as they make... See full summary »
When Reaper, the leader of a murderous biker gang, is released from prison on a technicality, he swears revenge on Wade Olson, the undercover cop who put him there. And when Reaper swears ... See full summary »
Geoffrey G. Bowers
A suburban high school teacher is fired from her job for teaching sex education. But she continues to give private sessions at her home to her former students leading to rumors and complications around town.
Moronic American student Rusty arranges a student exchange program for his closest friends and him to study in Romania for six months and meet his Internet girlfriend Draguta. He travels with potheads Pete and Wang, Pete's girlfriend Lia and her twin sister Danni, the naive and romantic Newmar and his dippy girlfriend Lynne, the nerd Brady and his sexually confused roommate Mike, and crook Cliff. His friends actually intend to party. While traveling by train to Razvan they learn that five hundred years ago the vampire Radu lost his beloved Stephania, whose spirit was trapped in a music box. Ever since, Radu has kept Stephania's body while seeking the music box to bring her back. One of Radu's minions has recently retrieved the music box but, mortally wounded by the vampire slayer Teodora Van Sloan, drops the object in a gypsy's basket. Newmar unwittingly buys the music box and gives it to Lynne, who opens it and is possessed by Stephania. When all arrive at the university, they are ... Written by
Claudio Carvalho, Rio de Janeiro, Brazil
Here, look. Got something for ya. The Codex Eroticon. A classic. Written like 1000 years ago. Makes the Kama Sutra look like Martha Stewart's prison notes. Ooh! You know what else I got? It's erotic comic books that I've been working on in conjunction with my memoirs.
[reading the cover]
"Uncensored and raw?"
You know what? The book'll do ya.
I don't know about this.
TAKE the Codex Eroticon, please! There's a legend that surrounds this hallowed tome, Newmar. They say that the ...
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If studios could do product recalls, the witless and inept "Transylmania" would be high on the list of returnable merchandise. This truly pathetic stab at horror movie comedy involves a group of brainless college students from America who enroll in a summer school session held in a vampire-infested castle in Romania.
The incoherent storyline is matched by the amateurish acting and low-grade humor, which frequently reaches back - badly - to old Marx Brothers and "I Love Lucy" routines for laughs.
Actually, the movie has seemingly saved all its clever and funny parts for an epilogue that runs all of six minutes. If the other ninety had been half as good, we might have had something here. But, any way you slice it, "True Blood" this ain't.
3 of 8 people found this review helpful.
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