Sarah Silverman: If we can put a man on the moon, we can put a man with AIDS on the moon. And pretty soon, we'll be able to put everyone with AIDS on the moon!
Sarah Silverman: I've done some drinkin', some druggin'. Tried it in the butt one or nine times.
Teacher: Today we have someone very special joining us. Let's give a big Valley Village hello and welcome to Mrs. Silverman.
Teacher, Children: [together] Hello and welcome Mrs. Silverman.
Sarah Silverman: Mrs. Silverman was my mother, and she was a bitch. I'm Sarah.