- Adrian Monk: [seeing Julie making fries as a snack] Oh no. No no no no no. I promised your mother. No junk food.
- [takes the plate of fries away from Julie]
- Julie Teeger: You promised?
- Adrian Monk: Yeah. I *am* the babysitter.
- [throws Julie an apple]
- Julie Teeger: Uhm. I don't think so! My mom said I was babysitting *you*.
- Adrian Monk: [laughs in disbelief] O-oh-kay
- Julie Teeger: Are you getting paid?
- Adrian Monk: Yeah.
- Julie Teeger: How much?
- Adrian Monk: You know, that is between your mother and me...
- [makes move to throw the fries away]
- Adrian Monk: ... why, how much are you getting?
- Julie Teeger: [smiles] Eight dollars an hour
- Adrian Monk: an *hour* ?
- [silent for a moment]
- Adrian Monk: I guess you're the sitter.
- [hands the plate to Julie]
- Adrian Monk: Enjoy your fries.
- Adrian Monk: [forcefully scrubbing his hands] Any more soap?
- Natalie Teeger: That's it.
- Adrian Monk: No, I mean is there any more soap in San Francisco?
- Adrian Monk: [Adrian and Natalie are breaking into a mansion. They have put up a ladder against the wall. Adrian is urging Nathalie to climb up] Hurry! What are you waiting for? Go!
- Natalie Teeger: [climbs the ladder and lands on the other side of the wall] Okay. You're next!
- Adrian Monk: [feeling the ladder] No, no, it's... eh... it's wobbly. Somebody has to hold it.
- Natalie Teeger: Mr. Monk I can't come back. I'm already over!
- Adrian Monk: Well, it's too wobbly! Look! It's all wobbly! I can't climb this! Why is it so wobbly?
- [Natalie who is suddenly next to Monk taps him on the arm]
- Adrian Monk: How did you do that?
- Natalie Teeger: I opened the gate.
- Adrian Monk: Good thinking. Ok, hold the ladder.
- Natalie Teeger: No Mr. Monk the gate is open!
- Adrian Monk: Natalie look. These are the leper's instructions. I've promised him I would follow them to a tee. We nodded on it.
- Natalie Teeger: Well, I'm using the gate!
- Adrian Monk: Ok, but don't tell the leper.
- Natalie Teeger: [looking at a photo of a young Randy Disher with a severe acne-covered face] Is that Randy? Oh my God! That is so funny! Not a funny in a haha-way, more a funny in a 'Oh boy this will really embarrass him'-way.
- Adrian Monk: Julie, I was duped. It was *all* a con.
- Julie Teeger: A leper-con.
- [laughs]
- Adrian Monk: What?
- Julie Teeger: Was he magically delicious?