Dexter Morgan: I'm going to tell you something that I've never told anyone before.
Dr. Emmett Meridian: Okay.
Dexter Morgan: I'm a serial killer.
Dexter Morgan: Oh God. That feels... so amazing to say out loud
Dr. Emmett Meridian: Well, you must be letting go, 'cause I've never heard you make a joke before.
Dexter Morgan: I'm not joking; I kill people. Whoo. There it is again.
Dexter Morgan: You should try it.
Dexter Morgan: [the psychiatrist turns off the lights in the room] What are you doing?
Dr. Emmett Meridian: I'd like to talk you through a deep relaxation technique. It might bring some things to the surface.
Dexter Morgan: What kinds of things?
Dr. Emmett Meridian: Well, there must have been a time in your life when you felt powerless, right? Foster-child, no control over your destiny. If we can bring some of those memories to the surface, we might find the root of your "control issues". First I want you to close your eyes and focus on your breathing. I want you to count each breath, okay? In: one, and out: two. Just give it a try.
Dexter Morgan: [in voiceover] This is ridiculous. I could be killing him right now.
Dexter Morgan: Nothing like some Little Debbies and a worthy new adversary to clear my head.
Sergeant James Doakes: Morgan, what took you so long?
Vince Masuka: Playing "hide the salami" with Mr. Prosthetics?
Debra Morgan: I don't fuck and tell.
Vince Masuka: Since when?
Debra Morgan: Can we go inside? I'm kind of wet.
Vince Masuka: [going to say something witty]
Debra Morgan: Don't!
Dexter Morgan: What are we looking at here?
Angel Batista: I'm thinking two circus clowns dancing. You?
Dexter Morgan: Nah, looks like a lobster. See the claws?
Angel Batista: Why do bloodstains always look like crustaceans to you?
Dexter Morgan: I like seafood
Angel Batista: Rorschach would say you have a hard time relating to others
Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] My therapist wants me to accept the things that are out of my hands. Tragically for him, he's not out of my hands.
Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] I can't have sex with Rita. Every time I sleep with a woman, she sees me for what I really am. Empty. Then she's gone. But I don't want Rita to go, which means I have to deal with this.
Dexter Morgan: I can't kill Meridian yet - I need another therapy session.
Dr. Meridian's Patient: [about Dr. Meridian] How about you? Finding him helpful?
Dexter Morgan: Nah. I'm a sociopath. There's not much he can do for me.
Dr. Emmett Meridian: So what do you want to talk about?
Dexter Morgan: Fakes. People who pass themselves off as something they're not.
Dr. Emmett Meridian: Like a pre-owned car salesman?
Dexter Morgan: A brave politician.
Dr. Emmett Meridian: A Jew for Jesus.
Dexter Morgan: A wolf in sheep's clothing.
Lt. Maria Laguerta: We both want the same thing.
Neil Perry: Uh, ten minutes alone with Angelina?
Lt. Maria Laguerta: To see you convicted.
Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] This is a disaster. I chose Rita because she was damaged. If she gets better I'll lose her for sure.
Dexter Morgan: What can I do for you?
Lt. Maria Laguerta: So many things. I need the blood spatter report on Vanessa Gale.
Dexter Morgan: Blood spatter's inconclusive. All I can tell is she was shot at close range. I wish I had more for you.
Lt. Maria Laguerta: Mm. Me, too.
[Captain Matthews appears in the doorway and shouts at Maria]
Captain Tom Matthews: Maria! The D.A. needs the work-sheet for the Ice Truck Killer case.
Lt. Maria Laguerta: I'm working on it.
Lt. Maria Laguerta: When did you talk to the D.A.?
Captain Tom Matthews: Oh, we had dinner last night. Mayor Allen took us out to celebrate Neil Perry's arrest. Hell of a good time.
Lt. Maria Laguerta: [She gives him a fake smile as he leaves and murmurs something including the word "puta."] I'm the one who get Perry to confess, and he's got the Mayor kissing his ass.
Dexter Morgan: I wouldn't be too upset. Matthews will be the one with the egg on his face soon enough.
Lt. Maria Laguerta: [softly] You still believe we got the wrong guy?
Dexter Morgan: Perry's a pretender to the throne. The real king is still out there, and he'll kill again. It's just a matter of time.
Dexter Morgan: [voice-over] The three suicide sisters shared the same therapist. Dr. Emmett Meridian. He must be terrible at his job.
[Debra knocks on the open door of the office where Rudy is working and shows her grinning face]
Rudy Cooper: [He holds up a prosthetic hand] Stay where you are! I'm armed.
Debra Morgan: [laughing] Bad puns?
[They share a passionate greeting kiss]
Debra Morgan: You said you needed a favor. What's up?
[She slides her hands inside his white coat to caress his torso]
Rudy Cooper: Take off your pants.
Debra Morgan: Oh, I should've known it was that kind of favor. You never ask me to come by before work.
Rudy Cooper: Mm, no, but I like the way you think. I have a patient who lost both her legs in a car accident. Really brutal.
Debra Morgan: Like your mom?
Rudy Cooper: [He nods] Which is why I want to do something special for her. I want to give her a new smokin' pair of legs. Yours.
Debra Morgan: No-ho!
Rudy Cooper: Let me just take a cast.
Debra Morgan: No way, no!
Rudy Cooper: It'll take twenty minutes, tops.
Debra Morgan: I don't want...
Rudy Cooper: Come on. Please? Stop being such a chick!
[He pulls her pants down, leaving her underwear alone]
Rudy Cooper: Sit down.
[Still using the name "Sean", Dexter has returned to see Dr. Meridian as a patient, hoping for clues that Meridian has helped his rich women patients to suicide]
Dexter Morgan: She was sitting on top of me, basically naked.
[He sighs heavily]
Dexter Morgan: Asking me to spend the night. And I didn't know what to do.
Dr. Emmett Meridian: It's okay, Sean. Don't beat yourself up. Your girlfriend really means something to you. I know that.
Dexter Morgan: Well, if she means something, why did I run away from her?
Dr. Emmett Meridian: For the same reason that you work so hard to shut everybody else out. 'Cause you're afraid they won't like what they see.
Dexter Morgan: Yeah, I think you're right. How can I change that?
Dr. Emmett Meridian: Well, for starters, you accept the fact that we all have a big bad wolf hiding inside of us. The darkness we don't want anyone else to see.
Dexter Morgan: [sensing a clue] Do you?
Dr. Emmett Meridian: Of course I do.
Dexter Morgan: [Dexter puts his fingers close to his mouth, almost as though he wants to bite his nails] Really?
Dr. Emmett Meridian: [Nodding] Mm-hmm.
Dexter Morgan: Well, how do you deal with your own wolf?
Dr. Emmett Meridian: Well, first of all, I accepted that it was there. I made friends with it. And I just let it out for a big meal, once in a while.
Dexter Morgan: [voiceover] At least three times, that we know about.
[Dexter has spent the night in Rita's bed and sits up at dawn, his back to her]
Rita Bennett: [drowsily] Next time we'll figure out what to tell the kids. So you don't have to sneak out like this.
Dexter Morgan: You want there to be a next time?
Rita Bennett: And a time after that!
[Still sleepy, but smiling, she rises enough to prop herself on one elbow]
Rita Bennett: Don't you?
Dexter Morgan: [the look on his face is both harsh and confused] No. I mean, yeah. I just -
[He turns to face her]
Dexter Morgan: I didn't freak you out?
Rita Bennett: Why would you think that?
[She reaches over to touch his arm]
Rita Bennett: Dexter, there's nothing you could ever do that would scare me away.