- Daria Morgendorffer: You two will never graduate.
- Butt-head: Never masturbate?
- Daria Morgendorffer: GRADuate. As in, like finish school.
- Beavis: You mean, like, school ends?
- Daria Morgendorffer: Yeah.
- Beavis: Cool.
- [Mr. Van Driessen asked Butt-head to give his history report]
- Beavis: No! I wanna give my report first! Ok, my anal report... I mean, oral report, is on the time me and Butt-head had dinner and stuff.
- Mr. Van Driessen: What does that have to do with US history?
- Beavis: Shut up, I'm not done yet!
- [watching the video for 'Mockingbirds' by Grant Lee Buffalo]
- Butt-head: Is this another video with big Muppets?
- Beavis: Yeah, yeah, here we go. Seems like they have these, like, Big Bird things in every video now.
- Butt-head: Yeah.
- Beavis: I was just thinking, y'know, um, you ever notice, um, Big Bird, he never poops.
- Butt-head: Yeah.
- Beavis: Yeah, yeah. It's like, they should have him poop. Then it'd be more realistic.
- Butt-head: Then Big Bird could have a Big Turd.