The Darjeeling Limited (2007)
Jack: What did he say?
Peter: He said the train is lost.
Jack: How can a train be lost? It's on rails.
Rita: What's wrong with you?
Jack: Let me think about that. I'll tell you the next time I see you.
Peter: I love the way this country smells. I'll never forget it. It's kind of spicy.
Peter: I like how mean you are.
Jack: The characters are all... Thanks.
Jack: I wonder if the three of us would've been friends in real life. Not as brothers, but as people.
Brendan: Why are your eyes so red?
Francis: Why is your head so bald?
Rita: [while making out] Your crazy! What's your name?
Jack: Jack, what's yours?
Jack: You're beautiful.
Rita: Don't come into me.
Jack: Which direction did your's go?
Francis: What do you mean?
Jack: Your feathers... mine blew toward the mountains
Francis: That's not right. It's not suppose to get blown away. You're suppose to blow on it then bury it.
Peter: I didn't get that. I still have mine.
Francis: You guys didn't do it right. I asked if you read the instructions. You did it wrong... I tried my hardest. I don't know what to do.
Peter: I don't think Dad would've hated it.
Francis: Let's go get a drink and smoke a cigarette.
Peter: What about our snake?
The Chief Steward: It's dead.
Peter: He killed it?
Jack: It's got to be against his religion or something.
Francis: [Francis and Peter are beating each other up] You don't love me!
Peter: Yes I do!
Jack: I love you too, but I'm gonna mace you in the face!
Jack: Wouldn't it be great if we heard a train go by in the distance?
Peter: Not really.
Francis: It'd probably be annoying.
Francis: Any questions?
Peter: I have one. What happened to your face?
Francis: He has this disease where his head is shaved except he doesn't have to shave it because he can't grow any hair in the first place. Don't talk about it around him though. It might offend him.
Francis: Ok. Let's check the next itinerary.
Peter: Fuck the itinerary.
Francis: Let's go have a drink and smoke a cigarette.
Francis: I guess I've still got a lot of healing to do.
Jack: Gettin' there, though.
Peter: Anyway, it's definitely going to add a lot of character to you.
Jack's Ex-Girlfriend: Whatever happens in the end, I don't want to lose you as my friend.
Rita: I promise I will never be your friend, no matter what, ever.
Jack's Ex-Girlfriend: If we fuck, I'm gonna feel like shit tomorrow.
Rita: That's okay with me.
Francis: [spotting some children crossing a river] Look at these assholes.
Jack: Do you want to go in the bathroom and smoke a cigarette with me?
Francis: [after Jack comes back from having sex with Rita] Where are the savory snacks?
Francis: [pause] Did you just fuck that Indian girl?
Jack: I think he's still in mourning.
Francis: Well I probably still am too.
Patricia: God Bless You and keep you with Mary's benevolent guidance in the light of Christ's enduring grace. All my love, Your Mother, Sister Patricia Whitman.
Francis: Let's take a look at the itinerary.
Peter: Fuck the itinerary.
Francis: I only remember certain details, but from what I've been able to reconstruct, it was raining, I was going about 50 miles an hour as I went into a corner, did some wrong steering, wheels went out from me, and suddenly, "Whoo", skidded off the road, slammed into a ditch and got catapulted 50 feet through the air. Little particles of glass and debris were stinging my face as I flew. And for a second, there was just total silence. Just... Then BAM! The bike crashed to the ground, exploded and caught on fire, and then I smashed into the side of a hill with my face. I was driving home. I live alone right now. Anyway, two joggers ran up and started digging out all the dirt that was jammed inside my mouth and my nose and my ears. My brain had stopped, and my heart had stopped, so technically I was dead at this point. They did all the procedures exactly right, as a result of which I'm still alive.
Francis: The first thing I thought of when I woke up was, I wish Peter and Jack were here.
Jack: You wanna read a short story I wrote in France?
Francis: How long is it?
Francis: How long is it?
Jack: How long is it? Never mind. Forget it.
Peter: You know, maybe right before whenever you're about to take out your tooth, you should say something like, "Please forgive this." Because, actually, it's kind of...
Francis: Can you back away a little? You just spit in my eye.
Peter: I can't believe you just said that.
Francis: Why not? It's the truth.
Jack: He didn't really mean it.
Alice: I think you're all equally grief-stricken. Let's just leave it at that.
Peter: [upon discovering that Jack's ex-girlfriend left her perfume in his suitcase] Could she be gaslighting you?
Jack: What's gaslighting?
Francis: You're the two most important people in the world to me. I've never said that before, but it's true, and I want you both to know it. I love you, Peter
Peter: Thank you.
Francis: I love you, Jack.
Jack: I love you, too.
Francis: How did it get to this? Why haven't we spoken in a year? Let's make an agreement.
Peter: To do what?
Francis: A: I want us be become brothers again like we used to be and for us to find ourselves and bond with each other. Can we agree to that?
Francis: B. I want us to make this trip a spiritual journey where each of us seek the unknown, and we learn about it. Can we agree to that?
Peter: I guess so.
Francis: C. I want us to be completely open and say yes to everything even if it's shocking and painful. Can we agree to that?"
[Peter and Jack cock their heads and look at each other. Francis simply continues]
Francis: Now, I had Brendan make us an itinerary
Peter: Who's Brendan?
Francis: My new assistant. He's gonna place an updated schedule under our doors every morning of all the spiritual places and temples that we need to see and expedite hotels and transportation and everything.
Patricia: [Exasperated by her son's questions] Maybe we could express ourselves more fully if we say it without words.
Patricia: Should we try that?
The Chief Steward: Do you have a prescription for these?
Francis: ...Well, I almost died.
Francis: Peter, you can not abandon your wife just because she's pregnant.