Morticia Frump Addams: Oh, this is dreadful. Has your memory been destroyed?
Gomez Addams: I don't know. I don't remember.
Gomez Addams: [gazing around at his home] Looks like a museum that's been condemned.
Gomez Addams: What's that?
Morticia Frump Addams: That's our butler, Lurch.
Gomez Addams: Is it real or do you wind it up?
Morticia Frump Addams: Surely you recognize your own offspring.
Gomez Addams: No, but the girl DOES resemble you.
Morticia Frump Addams: And Pugsley's the image of you.
Gomez Addams: [horrified] He is?
Morticia Frump Addams: Well, naturally. Look in the mirror.
Gomez Addams: [shunning away, quickly] I'm afraid.
Gomez Addams: I'm going to get you a lovely, golden-haired doll that says "Mama."
Wednesday Addams: But what have I done?
Gomez Addams: Nothing.
Wednesday Addams: Then why are you punishing me?
Gomez Addams: [spotting Mama in the stocks] This is an interesting old wooden carving.
Grandmama Addams: Me, a wooden carving?
Gomez Addams: It's alive!
[Morticia hopes Gomez' memory will return through routine activities]
Morticia Frump Addams: Let's recapture those mad moments, Gomez. Kiss my arm.
Gomez Addams: Your arm?
Morticia Frump Addams: Darling, I'm yours, from shoulder to knuckle.
Gomez Addams: Isn't that rather unsanitary?
Gomez Addams: It's not very easy to relax around here.
Morticia Frump Addams: Well, of course it is. Stand on your head.
Gomez Addams: Nothing takes the knots off a man's head like sandpaper.