I wanted to be a rapper. But rap was very innocent back then. It was all like "Rippity-rap-rap-rap-tastic!" It's gotten so arbitrarily aggressive now, they'll be like, "It's 2005, motherfucker!" And I'm like, "Really? You're mad about the date? You gotta pick your battles, man, because no one's gonna believe you when you're mad about real stuff."
[as a rapper
"You crashed into my car, motherfucker!"
"Yeah, well, you were mad that it was 2005. You're like the boy who cried '...
The Guitar Guy at the Party
Written and Performed by Mike Birbiglia See more