When Fay turns 30, her mother and sisters keep pressing her to have a baby. She chases some guys, has sex with them, and keeps their sperm in a bottle in the fridge, then selects the most suitable for self-fertilization.

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(creator), (creator) | 1 more credit »
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Cast

Episode credited cast:
...
Fay
...
John
Rest of cast listed alphabetically:
Rachel Davies ...
Fay's Mother
...
Billy
Hayley Fairclough ...
Tina
Nichola McHugh ...
Trixie
Lisa Millett ...
Julie
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Storyline

When Fay turns 30, her mother and sisters keep pressing her to have a baby. She chases some guys, has sex with them, and keeps their sperm in a bottle in the fridge, then selects the most suitable for self-fertilization.

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Drama

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Release Date:

21 July 1999 (UK)  »

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Fay: No relationships, no access visits, no maintenance.
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standard TV semi-documentary FUN
24 August 2015 | by (whakamaru) – See all my reviews

The title is wrong, it's not really about reproduction, but "Raging Hormones" or "Girlies Paranoia" or "Total LUST", might not look so good in the programme notes? Fay (Catherine McCormack) works in a chippie bar, (Americans call them French Fries). When she turns 30, her mother and contemporaries keep reminding her and showing their cute babies.

But Fay doesn't want a permanent relationship - male or female, "No relationships, no access visits, no maintenance", she says. So, she goes to a Lesbian Resource Centre and is given the necessary bits for self-insemination! There is a cute scene where the adviser tells her to choose the donor carefully - then a boy walks past and says "F.. off, you fat old cow"! So, then Fay has a series of one-night stands, just to get a condom full of semen, which gets saved in a sample bottle and kept in the fridge. Fay keeps a chart of qualities... honesty, charm, eye colour, and many others. If good, they get a star, if not, a black dot, which is a bit arbitrary? A 1-9 scale would mean more? But then, after four such goes, we are fortunately spared the details of the self-insemination! John, a doctor is chosen as the "ONE", but then he tells her... no, go see the film, it might be on youtube, as is "Fays phone rage", a short, especially good scene.

Then, she is not pregnant and they say..."No child-care problems... no losing your figure... no tantrums in Safeways... can stay out as long as I want... sleep in as long as you want... leave the spare-room to rent... and smoke what I want"!

Two minor complaints. Fay looks more like the executive secretary that she want to become, not a lowly chippie-girl, and John (David Tennant) doesn't look or behave much like my expectations of a doctor - which might be my fault, not his?


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