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|Index||246 reviews in total|
Summary: Wait for this one on Cable if you must see it- don't waste
your money or movie queue on this one. Keep a vomit bucket close and
expect to leave it with the IQ of an earthworm. I expect this one will
hit the bottom once it hits DVD.
What happened to Mike Myers wit circa Wayne's World, Axe Murderer, and Austin Powers? There hasn't been a SNL alum that has bombed so badly since Julia Sweeneythe's "Pat" movie(IMDb # tt0110169). Even bad movies I give a chance hoping to see some gleaming moment of humor, meaning, or purpose. I stopped caring about the movie 5 minutes in and regrettably stopped watching and left after about an hour. Oh the things I could have done in that hour- It is truly a shame that none of that could have been completed. This movie is not only juvenile, it is just plain stupid, slow, and humorless (unless you are an awkward 10 year old that found The Cat in the Hat a work of art) Myers once said in an interview that if he can make his wife laugh at his jokes, he knows they are good. Nobody laughed at this movie when I saw it, so I hope she isn't doing you the disservice of laughing at these "jokes" and "gags"(uhggg I really hesitate calling them that). I hope Meyers sticks to the formulas for his most recent successes: Prewritten scripts for animated movies. I only hope he leaves the turn and burn movie platform (lower budget stupid movies to turn any profit) behind and re-establishes a witty persona more suited of his age.
Best of luck Meyers- I will wait for your next one on DVD too.
Words cannot describe how close I was to walking out of the theater during the movie. However, I only stayed out of the hope that there would be a moment that was actually funny. It utterly failed to be another stupidly hilarious Mike myers comedy like Austin Powers or Wayne's World. There was absolutely no plot. It was really like the writers said, "Hey, let's go get a hot girl, a bad pop star, a midget and all the bad sex jokes we can find and make a movie about nothing!" This was truly disappointing.It was LOOOOOOOOOOONG too! By the end, it was getting painful to watch. I was appalled when I heard the couple behind me talking about how hilarious it was. (Pity their lack of taste). I would not suggest this movie to anyone! Good Lord, could it have gotten any worse??
It's obvious when a comic knows they're bombing: they resort to the
crutch of using dirty jokes or ethnic jokes for cheap, easy laughs.
Love Guru is evidence that Mike Myers is dreadfully insecure about the
future of his career.
Austin Powers (oh wait, that's the character being rehashed but not what they call him in this flop), learns Eastern Religion and a bad accent. His journey of enlightenment is apparently to insult people (usually with that familiar word that starts with "f"). He chases women, gives advice on how to offend women and therefore get one, etc. There are no laughs, no memorable moments, no reasons to watch this whatsoever. In addition to Myers self-destructing, Jessica Alba continues her challenge to set a record for consecutive lousy performances in worthless movies. Her current run of these career-ending disasters is a number roughly equal to the number of miles that light travels in a year.
This rubbish isn't even good enough for "straight to video" release. The producers, had they had a moment of self-preservation and/or sanity, should have decided not to release it at all.
An open letter to Mr. Michael Myers.
Dear Mr. Myers.
I am writing to inform you that it's the sign of the times and I think you should read and understand what it clearly means in regards to your....career. The years have come and go but unfortunately they have not been kind to cinema and society in general. The reason I'm writing this letter is because I feel that deep in my heart you should SERIOUSLY consider throwing in the towel and find something else worthwhile pursuing; maybe philanthropy perhaps? If you do that not only will people respect you more but it will also help wash away all memories of those years enduring your crap after crap after crap movies. Although I can't see how this can possibly happen overnight if fate and the universe persists, it will be a sigh of relief if it was all the more true.
Memories. Oh how profoundly fond those memories are and I recall watching "Wayne's World" when I was teeny-weeny with a more less jaded view of the world and then came "Austin Powers". Ahhh, the laughs those provided to help me drift away from the drudgery of life. Then a funny thing happened and the end result was a horrific turn as a pudgy, sex-innuendo laden feline several years ago. In my mind there's no denying that you should have realized that your career tanked at that point for someone once funny to even remotely consider such a perilous career move. The days of "Austin Powers" are gone, buddy. GROW UP AND BE A MAN!!!
Having read the news a while back of your latest endeavor, I hoped that you'll rebound after such a dog-pile-of-you-know-what of said movie. But alas, my hopes were shattered once again and as I left the theater after witnessing such a travesty of talentless vain proportions, the fragility of my mental state almost reached the breaking point when a good Samaritan saved me from what was, to be precise, an almost life-threatening ordeal. I thanked the good Samaritan of course as any sane individual would do and went our separate ways. But I will never, EVER, thank you for releasing such soul-shattering ineptness garbage that nearly killed me dared to be released for unsuspecting, innocent eyes!!!
So in conclusion, after clearing my head of the madness that I suffered, cleansed my spirit as well as my soul, I am now able to return to the outside world once again with the notion that no human being should ever go through such a horrific experience. Although I know that time doesn't heal all wounds but it is known that the human spirit is a remarkable thing that not even the likes of you and the evils of Hollywood inhabiting the blue and green world cannot comprehend. That special someone, that one individual who saved me from the madness you spewed fourth are moments like these that remind me of the good in the world. And for that, I'm grateful.
*** This review may contain spoilers ***
Take every bad idea from Austin Powers & Wayne's World, liberally mix
them with "The Guru" (starring Jimi Mistry & Heather Graham, obviously
where Myers stole the idea for this film) and you've got this excuse
for a film. Most of the jokes (if you can call them that) are 1 laugh
only, if that. Most of them are actually no laughs at all but that
doesn't stop Myers jamming them down your throat with the vain hope you
might find them funny if he repeats them often enough. A lot of this
movie is recycled ideas from the various Austin Powers films and Myers'
love of bad puns and word play (he might want to watch Ronnie Barker in
"The Two Ronnies" who has been doing it longer, much better and without
Possibly the only funny moment in the film is when Pitka is being beaten up by 2 children in a bar fight. Worst moment would be the "3 girls named Ann" joke. Myers also managed to not only ruin my favourite song by Extreme but also missed a great opportunity for a good cameo (he could have had the Extreme lead singer playing the sitar). Most of the jokes in this film are funny if you are a boy of 12, sadly I'm not 12 any more and Myers is just trying too hard for the entire film. Most punchlines can be seen from a mile away. Verne Troyer has pretty much destroyed any credible career he might have ever had by agreeing to be in this garbage. And don't even mention the "Elephants" scene which is not only totally pointless but slows down the movie at exactly the wrong moment. Myers doing a cameo as himself is the ultimate in ego indulgence in a film, the eventual outcomes are way too obvious as well.
Roanoake wins The Stanley Cup, gets his girl back from Jacques Grande (played very badly by Justin Timberlake), stands up to his mother and Guru Pitka loses his chastity belt, gets the girl & thus is the rip-off of Jimi Mistry's "The Guru" complete, right down to the Bollywood version of a Western dance number at the end.
Sadly this was just a movie to indulge Mike Myers and his love of childish humour so he's made no progress as either a writer or an actor since he made Wayne's World. Anyone could have filled Jessica Alba's role as she's completely forgettable (Heather Graham was much better in "The Guru", far sexier, a better actress and she could actually sing & dance better too!) and not enough was made of Pitka's sidekick/manservant who deserved a much bigger part in the movie.
Not recommended to even the most hardcore Mike Myers fan. Avoid!
I had a feeling that this movie was going to be bad but I had no idea
how awful this stinker was going to be.
I had heard bad things but I liked all the Austin Powers movies and pretty much everything else Mike Myers had done. How gutted I was however when I found myself sitting in front of this stinker.
It's hard for me to pinpoint exactly what was wrong with this thing but I think it was a combination of stinky things. Screen writing, direction, editing were the most obvious weak points. It's like the studio said to Myers "you just do whatever you want and nobody will interfere" and really somebody should have.
I actually stopped watching about forty minutes into the film because I had better things to do (like cutting my toenails).
Avoid this crap at all costs.
I saw this movie the first time when I was still a senior in high
school. The two male members of the household and I watched this movie
because we expected Mike Myers to deliver. I will admit that I was
disappointed when I watched this movie for the first time; in fact, it
was my sibling who had enthusiastically wanted to watch this movie more
than I did.
However, I am a person who gets bored with contemporary culture easily. I do not like modern movies and TV shows that much; I also lost my interest in video games. So I decided to buy this movie because it only sold for $3. To my surprise, I liked this movie a lot upon my second viewing. It made a lot of good philosophical and self-help points that especially seem relevant to the problems that a lot of young people my age tend to face. Despite the fact that the movie featured tasteless humor, I nevertheless did find it funny. The second time I watched it, I had not been grossed out as much because I was obviously more mature. I also like the music and the hockey in the film.
I have the suspicion that many do not like this movie due to the fact that it features dated humor. However, I find Mike Myers' 'dated' humor to be funnier than movies out now such as Horrible Bosses, Pineapple Express and the Hangover Part III. Even though Mike Myers may be making enough money from the Shrek sequels to opt out on acting, writing and directing for now, I still do miss his comedy and would like to see more of it. I, for instance, would like to see him star in a movie with Jim Carrey eventually; maybe they can do something like the Odd Couple.
I will conclude my review by stating how surprised I am that this movie received such low reviews. I, for instance, find this movie to be better than the original SpongeBob Squarepants' movie. I can obviously see how this movie received poor reviews from critics. I am also not surprised by the negative reception the movie got from the general populace, but I am surprised by comments that the movie is bad enough to have killed Mike Myers' career. Even if the movie does feature tasteless humor, I do not think anyone can deny that it manifests glimmers of Mike Myers' former brilliance. Finis.
I don't understand why this has gotten such a bad rap! It's a classic light hearted Mike Myers film, with an easy to follow plot line that just makes me laugh. I especially like the 'Mariska Hargitay' joke, which is absolutely hilarious if you're a Law and Order fan like myself. There are a few very over the top films, but criticizing Mike Myers for being eccentric is like criticizing Quentin Tarantino for being overly dramatic. Though there are similarities between this film and the 'Austin Powers' series, there is enough individuality to create an overall well made film. Please watch this movie for yourself, don't base your opinion on it's poor reviews.
*** This review may contain spoilers ***
I would call The Love Guru the worst comedy on record if there weren't
so many Adam Sandler films competing for that same recognition.
Mike Myers should've seen this coming. He made the glorious Austin Powers. He voiced the everlasting Shrek. He made me laugh for decades with Wayne's World. I know he was trying something new here, but he should've put a stop to it before it started rolling.
I'm not even going to get into the "offensive" category he set up. If anything, I'm offended that he thought ANY of this was humorous.
Admittedly, and I will not lie, I did laugh when the title character fights a chicken sorry, I mean COCK. That was funny, believe it or not. Wait, that and the "Gamblers Anonymous Casino Night" line. Okay, those two scenes that took up 15 second of the 87 minutes were hilarious.
The rest should be avoided at all costs. I watched this ONLY because it was featured in the How Did This Get Made podcast lineup. IF you must, watch this first, then listen to their hilarious take on it.
Otherwise, ONE HUNDRED PERCENT stay away. This is an awful movie with so many things wrong with it that I don't want to spend another second on
* * *
Final thoughts: A coworker continuously states: What CAN'T Justin (Timberlake) do? I responded: Not save this movie.
The Love Guru is a dreadful movie with a bunch of painfully unfunny
jokes,and I'm pretty sure I didn't laugh once while watching this
movie.U really like Mike Myers,I love Wayne's World,Austin Powers and
Shrek and he's the only reason why I watched this movie,but he was the
worst part of this movie.His character Guru Pitka was extremely
annoying and possibly the most unlikeable character I've ever seen in
any movie,and the scene where we see Young Pitka (a young boy with Mike
Myers forty year old face edited on) is just disturbing.The entire
movie is a big insult to comedy and I would recommend it to absolutely
The Guru Pitka (Mike Myers) heads back to America in order to help a hockey player with his love life in order to do well in the final game.
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