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Surveillance Vido of an Empty Parking Lot Is A More Entertaining Way to Spend 90 Minutes. 'Awful' is way too kind of a word for this piece of garbage. And to think, crew people actually had to get out of bed in the morning and waste gas driving to the studio to make this movie. A waste of time, money and effort. The only thing NOT wasted here was talent, since no talent was used in the making of this stinker. Is Paris so broke that she has to stoop this low to get some cash. Offering to water my lawn would garner Paris more respect in the public arena than what she did on screen here. I hope the studio didn't spend more than $50 on the script. If they paid more, they got ripped off.
AWFUL!!!
If ever there was a case for barring someone from the film industry,
this piece of trash is it. Money DOES NOT equate talent (or common
sense in the case of Hilton).
This movie has little plot and Hilton's zombie-like "acting" puts the
deep freeze on anything you might want to get out of the film. There's
a reason the rest of the cast is made up of unknowns and little known
bit players in Hollywood.
There have been some pretty dense actors through the years, but Hilton
is by far the runaway winner of all time. She even believes her award
from Harvard is something good!
Some people learn they don't have the skills to be in the business
after the first flop, or at least after the second bomb. Hilton however
is obviously too blinded by her bedazzled sunglasses and purse to be
able to recognize she has been in FOUR of the worst movies of all time!
this movie is to say the least, one of the worst things done to mankind in the past 100 years right behind the a-bomb. I had the misfortune of seeing this piece of garbage with my sister for her birthday. I would not recommend seeing this movie even it it is for comic value of how bad it is. There are 3 scales of bad: 1. the kind that makes you laugh it is so bad (murdercycle) 2. the kind that is soo bad it pisses you off (Epic Movie) 3. Gary busey bad (The hottie and the nottie). i hated it but my sister loved it, (granted she is 12 and has down syndrome (no lie)). the fact that this movie also tries to portray a message is even worse, because i wasn't sure what it was until i did some reading.... this is perfect grounds why IMDb needs a 0/10
I am just amazed that (as of this moment) there are 554 people who
rated this movie a 10...
I would like 10 pounds or 20 gallons of whatever it is that has warped
their mentality to such a degree...
Acting - Abysmal to Non-existent... Script - Huh? Wazzat? Directing -
Not that I saw.
My only regret is that I cannot vote less than 1...
Although I must say that I am quite satisfied that this flick has
rocketed to the numero uno spot of the bottom 100...
R
*** This review may contain spoilers ***
First off, the whole movie might just hit a Razzies grand slam for
2008. This film easily achieves Worst "Actress" for Paris Hilton, but
the horrible support of the main actor Joel Moore on her side, the
no-brainer screenplay, the childish script (if you look in the quotes
section, see if it feels like the way ACTUAL human beings would
normally talk), and the horribly wrong direction is not helping her
out. It's horrible to see that this movie was accepted to be taken on
to be a movie.
The Premise is simple: A guy (Moore) chases the girl of his dreams from
kindergarten (Hilton), and finds her just as stunning, and single, as
he could have ever dreamed. Well, not entirely single, as she still has
the same friend from kindergarten (Larkin), who is hideously ugly.
Hideously. Disgustingly. Hell-Hole. Frigging. Ugly! Jesus! All the
money it must have took to make 100% sure that Larkin was going to be
the most vomit inducing creature must have been half the cost of the
movie. The other half must have been Hilton's salary, as, there is
nothing else that possibly could have cost money, as the movie really
has nothing to offer. Don't get me wrong, though, Paris Hilton's
"Acting" doesn't even deserve the time and energy it takes to pull out
a check. Before I get off on a tangent (or is it too late), it sickens
me to see that hideous creature co-starring this mess.
Well anyway, as it turns out, Moore has to find a guy to go out with
Larkin, because Hilton swore that she wouldn't ever date again until
her friend has a date too. And, oh-so surprisingly, Moore starts to
develop feelings for Larkin despite the ugliness(!!!!!) of her skin.
Don't blame me for the horrible predictable screenplay, as anyone with
eyes could see that something like this would happen. Of course,
normally a moral is at least enough from saving a movie to be a 2
instead of a 1, but the true showing of Moore's character's true liking
for the "Nottie" is after her surgery and transformation. It implies to
all young girls that they NEED to be that perfect ten in order to be
looked gracefully upon society. That is a horrible thing to engrave
into a girls mind.
AND THEY HAD TO MAKE HER SO FREAKING UGLY! It's torture staring at the
screen with that freakish wreak up there. And half the movie is gross
out gags making fun of her. It isn't even like Norbit's make-up
department, which made a black man believably Asian. Instead, it
enhances unbelievability, as no one would ever be that ugly. Normally,
I look for ANYTHING to give in order to prevent a 1 star vote. This
includes Acting, Special Effects, Costumes, Dialog, even one fresh
joke. But this movie deserves what I give it, the worst possible grade
ever. I wish there was a Zero out of Ten, as this movie gives me and my
eyes nothing but pain.
OK, I'm not going to bash this film based on Paris Hilton, I admit, I
don't like the girl, but I'm not going to base my comment on that
alone, I think it's unfair. A lot of people are giving this movie a one
just because of Paris without even seeing the movie, it gets a bit
annoying. But I don't know why, I think I was just in a mood for one of
those awful films that just leave a bad taste in your mouth, I think
every once in a while, we need to see something like that. Now the
problem with The Hottie and the Nottie, besides it's stupid title? The
story, beyond predictable and hypocritical, along with the acting...
it's like they just took people off the street who had no credibility
to be in a film. I love how Paris Hilton isn't even the main character
and yet she is first billed, you know that she paid good money for that
or wouldn't be in it, big woop, her as an innocent charity loving girl,
that's believable.
Nate Cooper is a man that just can't seem to move on in life, after 20
years he returns to his home town looking for his first grade crush,
Cristabel. She's still around making men drool, but she won't go for
him unless he can hook her ugly friend, June, up with a guy as well.
June has bad teeth, bad skin, bad nails, bad hair, just all in all,
it's bad, so Nate does everything he can to get June a guy, but it's
more difficult than he could ever expect, until he finds out that love
isn't everything he thought it might be.
The script is predictable, stupid, could've been written by a teenager
and was very hypocritical, which you will see what I mean if you watch
this movie. Now I know that they were just trying to get a big name,
but come on... Paris Hilton? I actually had an open mind and just
thought to give the movie a shot, but she just is such a horrible
actress, like beyond horrible, I'm not just saying that because of who
she is, just I know you'll believe me. This is a movie that really
shouldn't have been made or if Hollywood wanted it so much, get
different people, please, before they do something like cast Paris...
never mind. Stay away from this movie at any costs.
1/10
*** This review may contain spoilers ***
The Hottie and the Nottie is somewhat of a conundrum; it is a romantic
comedy that is neither moving nor funny. It attempts moments of
gross-out humor, but holds back from going for an R rating. And for
having a target audience of teenage girls, it lacks characters that
most girls that age will be able to identify with.
The last two films that Paris Hilton has appeared in have received some
of the lowest ratings in the Internet Movie Database (IMDb). Pledge
This! received a user rating of 1.6, ranking it at #7 in IMDb's Bottom
100, while Bottoms Up was rated 1.9 and rang in at #22 in the Bottom
100. It appears as though Hilton is lined up for a hat trick with The
Hottie and the Nottie, having managed to hammer out three terrible
films in a row.
This is not to say all the blame should be placed on Hilton. She does a
decent job with what she had to work with. But scriptwriter Heidi
Ferrer manages to cram more teen movie clichés and unfunny moments into
ninety minutes than any reasonable person could.
The film begins with Nate Cooper (Joel David Moore) remembering first
grade and his first experience of love, with Cristabelle Abbott
(Hilton). Then the film flashes forward twenty years to an older,
sadder version of Nate, accompanied by unnecessary character narration
a sure red flag for a bad movie.
After his girlfriend leaves him, Nate decides to move from Maine to
California to find his first-grade crush. Somehow he is in touch with
Arno Blout (The Greg Wilson), from first grade, a disgusting mess who
lives with his mom. In less than 20 seconds, Arno quickly fills Nate in
on all that he's missed in the past twenty years; Cristabelle is hot
and single, but that is only because she lives with her ugly friend,
June Phigg (Christine Lakin), also from first grade! OMG! So begins
Nate's quest to conquer Cristabelle, aided by Arno's stalker file,
which tracks her every move. After their lives literally collide, it
doesn't take long for Nate to find out what a nice girl Cristabelle is
and how she creepily remembers him, too. Of course they cannot be
together because that would be a fifteen-minute movie, so she confides
that she will not go out with anyone until June gets a boyfriend. Nate
vows to find June someone so he can cozy up to Cristabelle.
From here, the film devolves into a banal take on "The Taming of the
Shrew" as Nate tries to find someone who will go out with the ugly
duckling of a friend, only to find himself suddenly in love with her
the instant she gets a makeover. Try not to count the number of loose
ends or the implausible leaps of believability -- there are simply too
many.
Probably the saddest piece in this Jenga game of absurdity is the
director, Tom Putnam. Just five years ago he was named "One of the 25
New Faces of Independent Film" by Filmmaker Magazine. But "fresh" isn't
a word that comes to mind when describing this film.
Just try and tell me you don't think the lead players had their roles all mixed up. Even as a tomboy on Step By Step, Lakin was a real hottie and knew how to make "boy" styles look cute. She deserves a whole lot better than this. Hilton's track record, on the other hand, speaks for itself. If Judge (Michael) Sauer had the power to indict her for bad acting, singing, and just plain performing overall, he'd lock the door, throw the key away, and make sure this nottie with an Executive Producer credit, of all things! never got out. I ragged on Madonna for her performance in Swept Away; compared side-by-side to H&N, she's Oscar material! If this aural and visual carnage never makes it to DVD or home video (trust me, it will), it'll be too soon.
*** This review may contain spoilers ***
Seriously, this movie actually got better when I remembered my wife
carried pepper spray in her purse, and I dug it out and sprayed myself
in the face until the canister was empty.
But, in fairness, not ALL aspects of this movie were 1 star out of 10,
and the single score system for IMDb does not address such. So, I will
try and expand the grading system:
Plot: WTF were they thinking? Cast: 2 stars.
Cinematography...*chortle*. Acting: At least as good as some hip-hop
videos played om MTV...you know, the ones starring Vanilla Ice.
Costumes/Wardrobe: 4 stars. (See, I am being fair.) Maker-up:
Disgusting. On SOOOO many levels. Sheer disgust factor: 1,000,000
stars. The freaks who made this don't seem to understand that laughing
at people who are not beautiful is a lot like laughing at people who
suffer from a lack of mental ability--it shows your own ugliness.
Forget the fact that the monster-girl blooms, most of the movie she is
the troll that gets beaten for our amusement.
Sick. Sick. Sick.
The video store was completely out of all the major movie titles, so
I'm looking around and land on The Hottie and The Nottie. At first I
didn't really want to rent it, but since there really wasn't much else
I just went ahead with it. This movie was absolutely horrible from
start to finish. This movie has no plot, terrible acting, among other
things that make this movie terrible. It is honestly an unwatchable
movie. I literally had to turn it off 45 minutes into it because I was
bored and Paris Hilton's acting made me lose braincells. So please stay
away from this movie it will rot your brain and bore you to death.
1/10
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