Luke Danes: Who are they?
Liz Danes: They're the support group of single moms I hooked up with. They're horrible! All they do is bitch, bitch, bitch. I'd have left every one of them too!
Emily Gilmore: [Lorelai and Rory have a high-spirited discussion at Friday night dinner] Spaghetti and meatballs is just too much excitement.
Liz Danes: Hey, let me tell you my big exciting news.
Luke Danes: Oh-oh.
Liz Danes: It's not an oh-oh, it's good. Unless you don't like babies, in which case it's not so good.
Luke Danes: You're pregnant?
Liz Danes: Oh, it was supposed to be a surprise, who told you?
Luke Danes: You just did.
Liz Danes: Wow, I blew my own surprise!
Liz Danes: I'm gonna do all the healthy things for me I did not do last time I was pregnant, like not binge drink.
Luke Danes: [to support group] Can I get you ladies anything? Compassion? Perspective?
Lorelai Gilmore: [about Emily Gilmore's new car] That's not a car. It's a rap video set.
Rory Gilmore: I could kill him!
Logan Huntzberger: You'd have to get in a very long line.
Rory Gilmore: The man should be drawn and quartered.
Logan Huntzberger: There's no fast pass, either. You just got to wait.
Rory Gilmore: Quartering's too good for him. He should be eighthed, sixteenthed.
Logan Huntzberger: I don't know; you quarter a guy, he's in four pieces. That's tough to recover from.
Rory Gilmore: He should be stretched on a rack, iron maidened, strappadoed.
Logan Huntzberger: Oh, my god. What is strappadoed?
Rory Gilmore: When you suspend him in the air with a rope tied to his hands that are tied behind his back.
Logan Huntzberger: You're scaring me with your knowledge of torture.
Rory Gilmore: I did a paper on the attorney general. It comes with the territory.
Richard Gilmore: [the Gilmores are discussing buildings that should have Rory's name on them] The Rory Gilmore Medical Research Laboratory.
Emily Gilmore: No, that sounds like monkey testing. People won't pick it!
Emily Gilmore: I'm all alone here and I desperately need to run a couple of errands.
Lorelai Gilmore: And there's no one else?
Emily Gilmore: I don't remember being in labor for 14 hours with anyone else, so no, there's no one else.