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"It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" Hundred Dollar Baby (TV Episode 2006) Poster

Quotes

Bobby Thunderstorm: Hey, now we're talking here. She's a killer!

Dee Reynolds: You're goddamn right I'm a killer.

Brianna: You look like a holocaust victim in pageant makeup.

Dee Reynolds: I will eat your babies, bitch!

Brianna: Bring it!

Frank Reynolds: Nobody's eating anybody's babies.

Bobby Thunderstorm: Hey, you looking to spur, little girl?

Frank Reynolds: No, no. No fight. She's not ready.

Dee Reynolds: Oh, I'm ready.

Frank Reynolds: No, no, you're not ready.

Dee Reynolds: I'm ready! Let me eat her babies!

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Dee Reynolds: [talking on the phone while on steroids] Yes dad, I know the fight is in a few hours, all right? I'm trying to find my goddamn head-band. Is that okay? Is that okay with you, if I find my head-band before I come down there? Is that all right with you dad? Jesus! Why didn't we get the orange one like I said? This one might as well be goddamn camoflaged!

[Dee punches her wall in rage]

Dee Reynolds: [screaming] Oh, good! Are you happy now? I just punched a hole in my wall!

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Dee Reynolds: [seeing Frank load up a lot of weight onto a bar] Uh, that looks really heavy.

Frank Reynolds: Look, this is not gonna be a half-assed workout. We gotta really get into it. It's gonna hurt.

Dee Reynolds: Yeah, but I can't lift that.

Frank Reynolds: Just position yourself under the bar and listen to me. Alright, here's what you're gonna do. You're gonna take all the weight on your neck. Then, you're gonna jam your legs down and hyperextend your ankles and then shoot back up and lock your knees in place.

Dee Reynolds: None of of those things sound right to me... at all.

Frank Reynolds: Look. You wanna fight like a man? You gotta train like a man.

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Dennis Reynolds: [while training Charlie to become an underground fighter] Why don't you punch this board?

[Dennis grabs a board and holds it up]

Charlie Kelly: Okay. Hold it steady for me. Watch your eyes.

[Charlie punches the board and groans in pain]

Mac: That looks like it stings.

Charlie Kelly: Oh my god! What is that made out of?

Dennis Reynolds: It's a board so it's, you know, made out of wood.

Mac: It's like particle board.

Charlie Kelly: It's like harder than wood, dude.

Mac: It's actually softer than wood.

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Dee Reynolds: [upon finding her steroids are gone] Who took my shit?

Charlie Kelly: [quietly] I might have had some.

Dee Reynolds: What did you just say, you little bitch?

Charlie Kelly: I might have had some of your pills or whatever.

Dee Reynolds: Oh yeah?

[Dee walks over to Charlie and gets in his face]

Dee Reynolds: [filled with rage] I am gonna punch a hole through your face!

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Mac: Charlie, we need to build up your tolerance to beatings!

Dennis Reynolds: Hence the smashings!

Mac: Yeah, we used the trash can but Dennis wanted to use a chair.

Dennis Reynolds: I think he's ready for a chair.

Mac: That's way too excessive.

Dennis Reynolds: The guy's ready for a chair.

Mac: No, he's not ready for a chair...

Charlie Kelly: Hey, hey, guys! I can handle a chair.

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Mac: [watching an underground fight] Well, this is awesome.

Dennis Reynolds: Yeah, this is amazing. There's blood everywhere. It's amazing!

Mac: Yeah, and we were totally right. These guys don't have any technique. They just get all cranked up like animals and beat the christ out of each other.

Dennis Reynolds: Look at all this money being thrown around. Dude, we gotta get in on this.

Mac: Oh yeah. You know really, I think it's about who can take the biggest beating.

Dennis Reynolds: Yeah.

Mac: You know who can take a really good beating?

Dennis Reynolds: Charlie.

Mac: Charlie.

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Dee Reynolds: Oh, I have an idea, Dad. Why don't you shut your fat little monkey face and hold the bag? I'm going to paralyze this bitch.

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Dee Reynolds: Rocky IV is not the greatest move of all time.

Dennis Reynolds: What do you consider to be a good movie?

Dee Reynolds: I don't know, Million Dollar Baby or something.

Dennis Reynolds: Are you serious? No way!

Dee Reynolds: It won an Oscar!

Charlie Kelly: It has Stallone punching a Russian's face in to all smithereens!

Mac: Lifting anvils and shit, pulling a truck through snow.

Dennis Reynolds: Million Dollar Baby is totally unrealistic. Girls can't fight, they don't have muscles.

Dee Reynolds: That is a horribly sexist thing to say.

Dennis Reynolds: It's not sexist, it's just truthful, you know.

Charlie Kelly: Girls can't pull trucks through snow.

Dee Reynolds: Could you pull a truck through snow?

Charlie Kelly: I absolutely could!

Dee Reynolds: You can barely walk through the snow, Charlie.

Dennis Reynolds: That is true.

Charlie Kelly: Okay, is the truck in Park or Neutral?

Mac: That is a good question.

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Shady Woman: Men are suck pricks.

Dee Reynolds: Oh, tell me about it.

Shady Woman: I bet you're real tired of them pushing you around.

Dee Reynolds: Oh God, you have no idea.

Shady Woman: If only there was a way that you could be physically tough enough to intimidate men...

Dee Reynolds: I'm sorry. Do I know you?

Shady Woman: Let's just say that I provide a much needed service around this place. Step into the shadows and, uh, we'll talk.

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Bobby Thunderstorm: [to Dee] I'm just busting your old man's balls you don't have to get your panties in an uproar!

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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